A Dance on the Edge of Sanity
by Kestrel
Summary: The world would never be the same after the Storms. The things that used to be known are now mysterious. Few things are what they seem to be. Nothing is the same. In this turbulent time a child is born who will question all that is believed to be.
1. Remember

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


  


_ Deep in a building of stone, there sat a woman. She looked young, but her pure white hair suggested old age. Her face was completely expressionless, her eyes were closed. She seemed unaware of the two concerned men near her._

  


_ The more muscular of the two men asked the other, "How much longer can she hold?" He was clearly very worried, the lines of age on his face were augmented by newer lines of worry and strain._

  


_ The other man, who was thinner and wore a mask to hide his face answered, "She will hold as long as she needs to, and not a moment longer, old friend." There was pity in this man's voice, and a deep sorrow. "She cannot hold herself here after what is to come."_

  


_ The muscular man's shoulders slumped and his head bowed. A single tear fell from his eye. "I know. I know all too well. How did we get here, my friend? How did we get here?"_

  


_ His friend simply said, "I don't know. I really don't."_

  


_ Behind the emotionless face of the woman, there was a thought._ _'You don't know, mentor, but I do. I remember it all.'_

  


_~_

  


A.N. Have I caught your attention yet? I hope so. Please review, it positively makes my day when you do!


	2. Beginnings

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


Elspeth groaned. She was cold. She desperately wanted to go back to her suite in the Palace and crawl into bed with Darkwind to keep her warm. Alas that she still had meetings to attend. The workings of Valdemar would keep going, even after the Storms. Even though she felt like hell. She wasn't even working hard, and she was still exhausted.

  


_'I pity the poor people who have to work full time. Particularly the builders. Accommodating gryphons, hertasi, and all other manners of oddly shaped beings is turning out to be harder than we thought it would be. At least I don't have to run around smoothing political feathers anymore. Somebody else has that job.'_

  


:_Those 'somebody else's' are admirable people,_: Gwena said. :_They know what they can do, and they know when they should turn to others for help. You could learn a lot from them, Chosen._:

  


Elspeth sighed, and continued walking across Companion's Field. There was a storm brewing, and it was bitterly cold for this late in the spring. The wind bit right through her coat, chilling her to the bone. There was something not quite right about this storm, but she was too tired from walking all over Haven to think about the storm. 

  


:_I'm the one and only Elspeth, Gwena. The only Herald-Adept. There are some things people will only believe if I tell them. Gods only know why they want to hear things from me. There are plenty of people who better understand the people from Iftel. Same with the Kaled' a' in. I wish the Council didn't think I was the only reasonable source of information they have. My ankles are really starting to hurt from all this walking._:

  


Gwena touched her nose to Elspeth's arm in sympathy. :_I know, darling. Maybe you should get the Healers to confine you to the Collegium until your baby is born. You wouldn't have to walk so much then._:

  


Elspeth sighed and looked down at her belly. It was almost time now. She could feel that the baby inside of her was almost ready to be born. She gave a slight smile. _'I bet anyone can tell I've only just under two months left. I look like an overstuffed pastry.'_

  


Gwena snorted in her mind. :_You do look rather large, Chosen. In fact, you look like you took half of your bedding and stuffed it under your shirt._: 

  


"Shut up, Gwena. I didn't ask for your opinion. Maybe you're right though. Maybe I should get the Healers to tell the Council to lay off." Elspeth blinked. She was feeling fuzzy all of a sudden, like someone had wrapped her brain in wool. "Gwena, I feel strange. Can you come here so I can lean on you for a minute?"

  


Gwena was by her Chosen's side immediately. :_What's wrong, Chosen? Are you all right?_:

  


"I'm fine Gwena. I just feel a little strange, that's all. I'll be fine in a min-" Gwena sagged under the unexpected weight of her Chosen falling on her.

  


:_Elspeth, ELSPETH! Where are you? What's wrong?_: Gwena frantically Looked at her Chosen, only to find Elspeth was wrapped in some kind of magical attack. She was doing her best to fight for herself, but she was fighting a losing battle.

  


The Companion poured her strength into her Chosen, knowing that she could protect Elspeth from just about anything. Gwena reared when Elspeth's mindvoice bellowed into her head.

  


:_It's not for me, Gwena! It's an attack on the baby!_:

  


Gwena realized they were going to need help.

  


:_DARKWIND!_:

  


~

  


Darkwind rubbed his temples. Sometimes these people could be so dense!

  


"We can't Gate you there Guildmaster. The Storms have changed things. To Gate somewhere now would be suicidal."

  


"But you could do it before. Why should now be any different? Surely you're good enough to do it again." This Guildmaster was extremely stubborn. She was determined to get what she wanted, and she wanted to be Gated all over the country. She claimed it was for the good of Valdemar. Even if it could be done, it would only be for the good of her purse.

  


"Guildmaster, the Storms completely changed the way things are done. Not with all the mages in the world could you open a Gate." No matter what Darkwind said, this woman would be convinced he was lying. Any of the Valdemaren Councilors would have backed him up, which was why this woman had cornered him away from help. She simply refused to understand how things worked now. She was fueling up for a real assault, and Darkwind didn't see any escape.

  


"Now look here, you foreigner, you.."

"Guildmaster Wetarn! Why there you are! You're needed at your Guildhall, very important business I hear." Herald Talia walked down the hall towards them. "Better get there fast, it sounded urgent."

  


The Guildmaster stared at the Herald, then glared at Darkwind. She turned her back on Darkwind, nodded at Talia, and walked quickly off down the hall.

  


Darkwind sighed. "Thank you Talia. I was about to get another speech on how barbaric I am. Sometimes I wish I were invisible. Then these people wouldn't keep cornering me and accusing me of stealing their Princess."

  


"Don't let them get you down, Darkwind. We all love you, and you wouldn't be wrong telling the people who don't like you that Elspeth wouldn't be stolen unless she wanted to be." Talia winked at him, bringing his spirits up a bit.

  


"That's true. She's about as likely to get stolen against her will as a tree. A big-"

  


:_DARKWIND!_:

  


Gwena's frantic mindcall shook him to his bones. Talia turned white. They turned and ran for Companion's Field as one, Darkwind in front.

  


:_What is it, Gwena?_:

  


:_The baby!_:

  


Darkwind cursed and doubled his pace. He had to get there in time to save Elspeth and the baby. There was no other option.

  


~

  


Elspeth writhed with pain not her own. She could feel the child inside of her twist in pain, vainly trying to escape. She pulled up her shields but they were instantly corroded by the attacker. Gwena's shielding was a little more helpful, taking some of the pain away. The air around her body heated up with the force the magical attack was exerting. She smelled hair charring, only to realize it was her own, sizzling in the heat.

  


_'I have to get away,'_ she thought. She crawled onto Gwena's back, hoping to at least escape the smoke from the grass burning around her.

  


"Get us away from the smoke, Gwena." She rasped. Elspeth then turned her attention to the attack. 

  


She didn't recognize the type of magic being worked on her baby. Elspeth gathered her will and shoved the magic as hard as she could, forcing it back down to the mage controlling it. Gwena helped shove, and together they pushed the magic out of Elspeth and back to where it belonged. Suddenly Elspeth felt a pull from the other end of the spell. It pulled on her mind, forcing her mindshields down. She heard a rough voice in her mind.

  


:_You may think you've defeated me, little mage, but my job here is done. Good luck delivering that baby. I sincerely hope you don't survive._: 

  


The mind connection snapped, taking the last of the spell with it. Elspeth sagged and fell off Gwena's back onto the hard stone beneath. She landed on her side, smacking her enlarged belly on the stone. Pain lanced up her back, and she realized something was very wrong. She felt a shudder go through her body, then the first contractions started. She was going into labor a month and a half early!

  


:_Gwena!_: She mindcalled. The Companion positioned herself so that Elspeth was leaning back on Gwena's side.

  


:_Take deep breathes, Elspeth. Try to relax. If everything goes well, you and the baby can still make it through this in fine shape._:

  


Just then, Darkwind arrived.

  


Darkwind immediately fell to her side. "Elspeth, what happened? Are you and the baby all right?" 

  


Elspeth looked at him and opened her mouth to speak, just as another contraction doubled her over in pain. She hissed in pain, and Gwena nuzzled her neck with her nose.

  


Talia sped up just in time to see Elspeth double over. "Gods," she said. "She's having the baby. Somebody get a Healer!" A servant had followed them on their dash to the Field, thinking she might be needed. She ran off at top speed to the House of Healing.

  


Talia knelt on the other side of Elspeth and slung an arm around her shoulders. "Relax, kitten. The Healers will be here soon; they'll take some of the pain away. You'll be fine. After all, women have been doing this for generations. It gets worse, and then it's over." Talia looked at the lean woman before her. Elspeth straightened her back and looked ready to take on the challenge, and then another contraction swept over her and she curled up in pain again. Darkwind looked at Talia uncertainly. She shook her head slightly. She had a nasty feeling that this was going to get a _lot_ worse before the end.

  


~

  


The servant skidded into the House of Healing, almost running into a Healer trainee. 

  


"Where's a birthing Healer?" the servant gasped. "Lady Elspeth's having her baby! Early!"

  


The trainee looked at the ruffled servant, then dashed off to find Healer Terwis. She was the best at delivering early babies. The trainee ran down the hall, turned the corner, and rushed into Terwis' healing room without even knocking.

  


Terwis looked up for the noblewoman seated before her. The woman was pregnant with her fourth child, and didn't seem likely to stop after this one was born. 

  


The noblewoman screamed in shock as the young Healer trainee ran in.

  


"Peeping tom!" she yelled angrily. "Sneaking in here to see me, how dare yo-." 

  


"Healer Terwis!" The boy yelled. "Lady Elspeth's having her baby!"

  


Terwis looked startled. "This early? Why didn't you say so, boy?"

  


"I tried to, Healer, but she screamed." The boy said, indicating the noblelady.

  


"Get out, both of you!" The noblewoman said. "I'm not due for another three months, and poor Elspeth's never had a baby before. Don't worry about me, worry about her!"

  


Terwis looked at the lady with new respect. "If you don't mind, Lady Coriya, I'll do just that." She got her emergency Healer's bag and was out the door before lady or trainee could react.

  


Lady Coriya looked at the trainee pointedly. "If you don't mind, young sir, could you step out for a moment?" The boy blushed and ran out the door, closing it behind him.

  


~

  


Healer Terwis ran down the hall the trainee just had, noticing the servant on the way out. "Well girl, where is she?" Terwis said gruffly.

  


"She's in the Field, Healer. Herald Talia and Adept Darkwind seemed to think she'd been attacked. I didn't see any blood, but-" 

  


"Attacked? Damn it, why now?" Terwis sprinted out the door down to the Field. Just as she flew out the door, the storm that had been threatening all day broke, pouring buckets of icy water on her. _'This could get complicated.'_ she thought.

  


~

  


_'Mother never said labor hurt this much.'_ Elspeth thought. Then again, her mother had never been attacked and forced into an early labor, either._ 'Where is that Healer? I hurt in places I didn't know I had. And I'm wet.'_ The storm that had made her so jumpy earlier in the day had broken. She was raked by another contraction, as if they were responding to her thoughts of pain. _'At least I have Darkwind and Gwena. They make it a lot easier.'_ Gwena and Darkwind were sharing the pain of the attack, so Elspeth was really only feeling the pains of labor. _'Only. Ha! Owww.' _ Yet another contraction. _'They aren't supposed to be so close together this soon, are they?'_

  


"Elspeth, can you tell me exactly what happened during this attack? Knowing what happened could well make the difference between life and death." Healer Terwis had arrived; for and older woman, she was fast on her feet.

  


Elspeth grimaced as a contraction shook her. "I was walking with Gwena. I had been feeling strange all day. I started to feel a little tired, then all I felt was pain. Whoever attacked-" She shuddered from the pain of another contraction, "Whoever attacked me was good, blew right through my shields. Wasn't attacking me, though. Was attacking the baby. I could feel her twisting around inside of me, trying to get away. Gwena and I forced the mage out, but he or she grabbed onto my mind and said something like :"You think you won, but I did what I needed to. I hope you die." Or something like that." Elspeth twitched. "What could that have meant? I have no idea what he di-" She doubled over in the middle of the word, grimacing in pain. 

  


Terwis placed a hand on her skin and felt that she was burning with fever. 

  


"Lady, we desperately need to get you to the House of Healing. I don't know what that mage did, but you're not going to have an easy time of this. You have a fever as well, and that does not bode well."

  


~

  


"Why do I always get the feeling the servants know things before I do?" Selenay asked Daren. Thunder roared overhead, announcing the arrival of spring.

  


"Maybe because the servants do know things before you, dearest." Daren said cheerfully. "It wouldn't surprise me if they know more of what goes on than any noble."

  


"Maybe I should use them as agents."

  


"Maybe."

  


There was a knock on the door just as things were starting to get interesting. Daren sighed. "Perfect timing. Just exactly the right time to be most irritating." Selenay giggled like a woman much younger and got up to open the door.

  


"Talia! What's wrong? You look like something terrible has happened!"

  


"Elspeth was attacked about half an hour ago. A mage attack. The Healers think she'll be okay, but you're going to be a Grandmother a month and a half early."

  


Selenay started. "She's having the baby? How's it going?"

  


Talia sighed. "Not well, Selenay. Not well at all. She's having contractions too close together too soon. She's in a lot of pain; it's not going to be an easy birth."

  


Selenay's face fell. Daren looked worried. "Daren, I'm going to go be with my daughter. Unless the world is falling to pieces, there I'm not doing anything until this is over." She went to go change into something that would not be missed if she ruined it. "Take me to my daughter, Talia."

  


~

  


Eight candlemarks and nine kinds of pain killers later, Elspeth was gasping with pain. She had never hurt so much in her life. The contractions were coming much faster now, and with much more power. She was in a bed in a sterile looking room, with Gwena on one side and her mother on the other. She hadn't thought the Healers would let Gwena in, but with the furious storm outside, they hadn't the heart to make her wait outside the door. Elspeth was extremely grateful for that. She needed all the help she could get.

  


Her mother was coaching her, telling her stories of her childhood and funny stories about other things. Elspeth was grateful to her mother, but her stories weren't helping any. 

  


Darkwind was sitting in the bed behind her, propping her up more than the pillows were. His gentle hands rubbed her shoulders, keeping her from tensing too much with the pain. She was glad he had told the Healers about this particular tradition of the Hawkbrothers. It was much nicer to have him close to her than away pacing in some hallway like many of the fathers-to-be she could think of. She reached up to touch his hand.

  


:_I'm glad you're here, ashke._:

  


The hand she wasn't holding snaked up her neck to caress her cheek.

  


:_Where else would I be?_: He asked. :_I may be an outlandish barbarian, but I would never leave you when you needed me. Particularly not when your troubles are partially my fault._: 

  


Elspeth smiled. :_I like barbarians. They're so civilized._:

  


She could feel him shake with laughter behind her. :_If I'm civilized, I must not be trying hard enough. I should be more crude._: He sent her an image of himself running through the Palace in a loincloth, chanting and shaking a stick at anyone who came near.

  


Elspeth laughed aloud at this, but her laughter was cut short as she arched her back in pain caused by another contraction.

  


~

  


Healer Terwis looked at her, concerned._ 'This should not be nearly so hard on the poor child.' _She thought. _'Something is wrong. But what?'_

  


_~_

  


Darkwind continued to rub Elspeth's back, even though his hands hurt like the devil. His hands were a small price to pay for Elspeth's comfort.

  


The sun had set candlemarks ago, and it was well past midnight. It was still stormy outside, if anything the storm had gotten worse. Elspeth had been in labor for fourteen candlemarks now, and the baby was showing no sign of emerging any time soon. Selenay looked droopy, and Healer Terwis was tired from easing Elspeth's pain. Darkwind felt like his hands were going to fall off any minute now, and his mind wanted to cease functioning.

  


None of them looked or felt nearly as bad as Elspeth. Even if she hadn't been pregnant, fighting off the attack would have tired her. Now, after fourteen candlemarks, she was exhausted. Her hair was soaked with sweat, as was the nightgown she was wearing. Her skin was gray and slack with exhaustion, and her eyes were dull.

  


She groaned in pain as more of the cursed contractions slammed through her body. If she'd had the energy, she would have screamed, they were so painful. She didn't have the energy, though, and what little energy she had left was rapidly slipping through her fingers.

  


Healer Terwis was stumped. The birth simply should not be so hard. It was an early birth, the baby wouldn't be big enough to cause this much trouble. It might have been a long birth under normal circumstances, but never would it be so painful and strong yet never get any closer to the birth. It was as if someone was keeping the baby inside of Elspeth's body, no matter how hard her body tried to expel it. 

  


_'It simply doesn't make any sense! Only a mage or a Healer could keep a baby from being born!'_ Terwis thought in frustration. _'I don't under... A mage!'_

  


Terwis looked closely at Darkwind. "Darkwind, is it possible to cast a spell to keep a baby from being born?"

  


Darkwind blinked. "I would think so, but why would somebody want-" His expression darkened very quickly. "Do you think that's what the attack was all about?"

  


"I don't know, man! You're the mage, you tell me!"

  


Darkwind didn't need to be told twice. Without waiting a second more, he looked at Elspeth with his Mage Sight. There didn't seem to be anything there.. Wait! Hidden carefully by Elspeth's inner magic and that of the baby, there was a residue of magic that shouldn't have been there. He poked it with his mind, and it suddenly tightened around the baby. Elspeth's body arched, she screamed in pain. His touching the residue had activated a spell meant to kill Elspeth and take his child with it.

  


He pushed on the spell, trying everything he could think of to dissolve it so it couldn't cause any harm. Gwena helped, doing everything she could to get the spell to loosen it's death grip of her Chosen. Darkwind delivered a particularly savage blow to the spell, and it loosened it's grip on Elspeth. However, it tightened on the baby, tapping into her life energy and searing her Channels. She writhed in her mother's womb, trying to get away from the pain. Darkwind realized that without help, his child was doomed. So he called for help from the person he knew could give it. Gathering all of his mindpower around him with Gwena to boost him, he Mindcalled: :_FIRESONG!_:

  


~

  


Somewhere deep in the Tayledras territories, a man started out of sleep and fell out of his bed. 

  


_'What on earth?'_ Firesong thought. _'Must have been one hell of a dream, to wake me up like that.'_

  


"Ashke?" A sleepy voice asked. "What happened?"

  


Firesong stood up and dusted himself off. "Nothing, Silverfox. I'm fin-"

  


:_FIRESONG!!_: There was the desperate mindcall for help again.

  


Silverfox looked startled. "Who is that?" He asked.

  


"I don't know.." Firesong answered. He sat down. "I'm going to find out."

  


He traced the voice back to where he had first heard it, then he followed the channel to it's owner. 

  


_'Owners.'_ He thought sourly. _'This better be good.'_

  


:_Who bellows at me?_: He spoke down the line.

  


:_Firesong! Please, brother, I need your help!_:

  


:_Darkwind!? What's happened?_: Firesong flew the rest of the way down the line, where he found Darkwind and Gwena waiting for him. :_Where's Elspeth?_: 

  


Darkwind opened his eyes so Firesong could see the spell that kept Elspeth and his child wrapped in it's embrace. Firesong understood immediately.

  


He held out a mental hand to Darkwind, and one to Gwena. :_Come brother, sister. I do not know who laid this spell, but it will take all of us to destroy it._:

  


Together they attacked the spell with it's death grip on mother and child. Darkwind realized something terrible right away. The spell had linked into Elspeth's Mage Talent and was using the power there to blast his child's channels open. It had already blasted the Mage Talent and Mind speaking channels wide open, it was now working on the Healing and Earthsense channels. If the child didn't die of the terrible trauma this caused, she would be a terrifying mage very early in her life. 

  


They attacked the link to Elspeth first, as breaking that one would weaken the stronger link to the baby. The three of them shattered the link, cutting off the main power supply for the rest of the spell. They all felt Elspeth's pain as another contraction, this one stronger than all the rest, took her in it's grip. She screamed again, and the baby twisted inside of her. 

  


A sudden surge of power tore at the magical shrouds around the baby. Elspeth, weakened by her labor and the spell feeding off of her, was trying to attack the spell tearing her child apart. 

  


:_Now!_: Gwena's Mindvoice screamed. :_Together!_: All four of them surged at the spell, tearing it from the baby. It could not hold out against the wrath of four mages. It released it's hold on the baby. The mage who created the spell had planned for something like that to happen, though. As the spell unspun itself, it lashed a terrible blow at Elspeth's heart. She could feel herself falling into darkness as her heart gave out, even as her body arched in the agony of giving birth.

  


Gwena lunged after her Chosen, determined not to let her die. Darkwind and Firesong where close behind, anchoring Gwena into the real world. They were losing the fight, though, and Elspeth was almost beyond their grasp.

  


Their grasp, but not a Healer's. Terwis jolted Elspeth's heart with all the power she had. She made the heart start beating again, then Healed it so it would work for the rest of Elspeth's life. Terwis' other specialty was Healing patients with bad hearts, and she had Healed many patients with more serious problems than Elspeth's.

  


They all relaxed, glad that they had banished the spell and saved Elspeth and her baby. They were starting to feel very good about themselves, until Selenay's voice cut through their peace of mind. 

  


"This is all well and fine, but there's still a baby to be delivered."

  


As if to remind them this was true, Elspeth cried out in pain from yet another contraction. It appeared that this still wasn't going to be an easy birth.

  


~

  


"Push, Elspeth! Push!"

  


"What do you think I'm doing? Pulling?"

  


"Push and breathe."

  


"You think I'd forget to breathe?"

  


"There's a specific type of breathing for giving birth. It goes-"

  


"I know how to breathe, dammit!"

  


~

  


:_So how do you feel, about to be a father, Darkwind?_: Firesong asked. He had decided to stick around until the baby was born, just to see what he had helped save.

  


:_Tired and bruised, old friend. And thinking I shall never take up a career as a kestra'chern. My hands hurt from massaging._:

  


:_That is good. You would make a terrible kestra'chern. You are better as a dutiful, civilized husband, soon to be father._:

  


:_Firesong, what will my child be? I can only think of one other who had his channels burned open, and never so early. She is a mage of Adept potential before she is even born. How can I know she can handle that?_:

  


:_You can't know, Darkwind. You can only assume that since this happened, it was meant to happen. You can't know she wouldn't have been a mage even without the help of an enemy. With Mage potential like hers, there was a good chance she would have been an Adept anyways. There is nothing you can do now, what's done is done. The real question is: What will you do to make sure she doesn't get out of hand? She will need lots of training early on, even with magic so different now, she must be trained before she can hurt someone._:

  


:_I don't know what we're going to do. Can I ask you for help, when I need it?_:

  


:_Darkwind, you and Elspeth can always come to me for help. When she is older, your daughter can come to me for help as well. You can even visit whenever you like; Silverfox and I are moving to K'vala next month. We wanted to wait out the winter, and a soon as it's warm enough, we'll be on the move. K'vala is a lot closer to Haven._:

  


:_It is good to know you are there, brother._:

  


~

  


Terwis had ordered the windows open earlier in the night. It had gotten stuffy in the room, and after the storm had broken it was pleasantly cool outside. The sky was a beautiful red-orange color. The sun had almost breached the horizon.

  


"This should be the last haul, Elspeth. Ready, one, two, three, push!"

  


Elspeth pushed with all her might, her face turning a brilliant red.

  


  


"Push!"

  


Darkwind held her from behind, embracing her in his love.

  


"Push!"

  


Firesong watched from Darkwind's eyes, comforting the two soon-to-be parents with his presence.

  


"Push!"

  


Terwis stood ready to catch the baby, Selenay held a blanket.

  


"And, Push!"

  


Elspeth gave a battle cry and pushed with all her might. Seconds later, her cry was joined by another. The high crying of a healthy newborn filled the room and everybody cheered. Elspeth collapsed back into Darkwind's arms, utterly spent.

  


Terwis picked up the child, wiped her off and severed her umbilical cord. Selenay wrapped her in a blanket and handed her to Elspeth.

  


"Let's see the little trouble maker, Elspeth."

  


Elspeth took a deep breath, uncovered her child and held her up. Just as she rose, the sun broke over the horizon, bathing the child in golden sunlight. 

  


"What is her name, parents?"

  


Darkwind and Elspeth looked at one another. There seemed to be a silent conference going between them. Finally they looked at the group of people.

  


"Her name is Windstar."

  


Healer Terwis smiled. Another successfully delivered baby. Gwena whinnied her approval. Firesong sent love and wisdom to the child. Vree landed on the bedpost to see the new hatchling. Selenay smiled, light shining through her eyes.

  


"Welcome to the world, Granddaughter Windstar."

  


~

  


Somewhere, far away, a mage in black threw his scrying stone into a wall.

  


"Damn! How could I have failed? It was a perfect plan!"

  


He vented his rage by throwing things around his workroom, though he was careful not to break anything important.

  


A strange figure moved toward the mage. It stood like a human, but the parts of it's skin sticking out of it's enormous black robes where covered in black scales.

  


"Creatorr," it hissed. "The child wasss born at dawn thissss morning."

  


The mage whirled to face the creature. "I know, dammit! I spent all of this night trying to prevent her birth!"

  


The black creature shook it's head. "No, Creatorr. The boy-child whossse Mage Talentsss you ssstretched. The one to be your Ssssecond. He will be a Great Adept, sssirr. Easssily the equal of thisss Windstar."

  


"Hmm. Very interesting, Tathil. I couldn't get rid of her this time around, so I will wait for this boy to grow up, and let him kill her. Excellent!" The mage's face was terrifying and beautiful at the same time, with the looks of a young God, and the terrible coldness of an ice sculpture. His white hair fell in a beautiful cascade behind him. The only thing to suggest he was abnormal was the lack of any color to his eyes. They were a pure, unbroken white, yet he could still see.

  


"Bring this child to me, Tathil. He must never know any savior besides me."

  


Tathil nodded. He flung off the robes, showing the reason for their bulkiness. The robes had hidden enormous bat-like wings. The creature walked to the window, jumped out, and flew off into the distance. 

  


The mage picked up his scrying stone and looked to Valdemar again. Elspeth and Darkwind were coddling their new child, behaving like absolute fools. The mage smiled when he saw the little girl. He laughed a terrible, cruel laugh.

  


"Enjoy your life, little Windstar. It will be rather short."

  


~

  


Far overhead both Haven and the mage's hiding place, a golden eagle and a silver falcon flew. They knew what was to come. The golden eagle bobbed it's head to the silver falcon, and flew quickly to the dark mage's hiding place. Once there, he found a comfortable place in the forest and made himself at home. The silver falcon looked longingly to Haven, then flew to the Vales of the Tayledras. She would await her bondmate here, for as long as it took.

  


~

  


  


  


A.N. What did you think? Did you like it, hate it, love it? Any suggestions? That's what the little review box is for, people. I will listen to your reviews as much as I can. I would love to hear your comments. Till next chapter!

  


I don't own Elspeth, Darkwind, Firesong, Silverfox, Gwena, Vree, Talia, Selenay, Daren, or anyone or anything from Valdemar. Wish I did, but there you have it. They belong to Mercedes Lackey. Windstar is mine, though, as is Healer Terwis, Guildmaster Wetarn, Lady Coriya, and the Dark Mage, Tathil, and the birds. If I left anything out, I'm sorry, please don't sue me. All you'd get is my electric bass, and you don't want that, now do you? :) 

  


  


  



	3. Different

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


"Windstar! Come down from there! You'll fall for sure!"

  


Windstar looked down at the maid from her lofty perch. She sighed. Six years and they still didn't understand the point she had been trying to drive home since she was four:

  


"Tayledras don't fall out of trees!"

  


The poor maid was at the edge of her patience. She was terrified for the Princess; the maid had kept her feet firmly on the ground for all her life and couldn't understand why Windstar wouldn't do the same. 

  


"Tayledras or not, Princess Windstar, you have to get dressed up for the Court party. Now, please come down from there!"

  


Windstar sighed again. "Can I help choose my dress?" She asked. "Please?"

  


The maid smiled. Windstar was ten years old and already sought after for her fashion advice. "Of course you can choose your dress, Windstar. You have better fashion sense than I do."

  


Windstar grinned and slid quickly down the tree. The maid grimaced, Windstar's controlled fall was beautiful to behold, and sent shivers down the maid's spine. Her snakelike grace was incredible. 

  


"Here I am, Mirian. Let's go get ready for this dull party. Will there be pastry?"

  


Mirian laughed. "Child, if you keep consuming pastry like you do, you will be perfectly spherical by the time you're fifteen. Yes, there will be pastry."

  


The maid and the girl walked from Companion's Field to the Palace complex. They were followed by two Companions. After they left the Field the Companions watched from behind the fence, their eyes fixed on the small girl. As she disappeared around a corner, the two Companions looked at one another knowingly, then cantered off in opposite directions. 

  


~

  


"Ow! Mirian, please be careful. I want my hair on my head, not yanked out on the floor!"

  


Mirian giggled. "I don't even need to help you, pretty one. You could handle this white mane of yours without any problem. Heck, you could do everything I do for you all by yourself! You hardly need me."

  


Windstar's back stiffened. She waited for Mirian to finish a brush stroke, then turned and hugged the maid.

  


"But Mirian, I do need you! If you left, I'd be all by myself when I wasn't taking lessons. Mother and Father are too busy for me most of the time, and none of the other children like me!" Windstar said. It was the truth, plain and simple. The other children didn't like her, and her parents tried their hardest but they were still busy most of the time. "I wouldn't have any friends if you left!"

  


Mirian looked at the child wrapped around her. _'Poor baby,'_ she thought. _'There's no reason the other children shouldn't like her. She's one of the sweetest people I know. It must be all her power. She's a mage equal to many already, and showing no signs of slowing down.' _

  


Mirian patted the top of Windstar's head. "I'm not going anywhere, Windstar. Now, the party's almost started, you need to find a dress."

  


Windstar looked up at Mirian with pale, silvery blue eyes. Her wide cheekbones and sweeping eyebrows proved her Tayledras heritage, while her pale skin showed her mother was a Valdemaren. Her waist length white hair proved her unusual power. Mirian always thought she looked a bit like a ghost, pale and colorless, yet with her soul shining out from within her.

  


Windstar nodded. "Dress. Right. I can do that. What did I wear last time, Mirian?"

  


"That adorable pink dress, the one with all the ribbon bows. The ladies thought you were the cutest thing ever."

  


Windstar scowled. "And I thought I was the most uncomfortable thing ever. Gods, I don't know how those Valdemaran ladies do it, with all the poofies and fluffies. Uncomfortable and ugly!" She stalked over to her wardrobe. "Not this time, I tell you! Tayledras robes for me!" She riffled through her clothing. "Mirian, would you get me the silver horse and hawk hair charms and, errrr, the tiny quartz chains? Please?"

  


Mirian walked over to the wall on which Windstar's hair ornaments were hung. She sorted through the feathers, crystals, bells, ribbons, and charms until she found the adorable little chains with hawk and horse charms hanging from them. Then she found the the strings of refractive quartz crystals. 

  


"Mirian, am I supposed to were one of my royal circlet things? Please say no, I hate them."

  


"You're royalty, Windstar. You always have to were some kind of circlet in Court to show your rank."

  


Windstar sighed. "All right, I need the, need the, ummmm, the dragon circlet. It's a gift from my Uncle Firesong, you know. He asked the hertasi to carve dancing dragons in it for me. He said it was made form moonstone, it's supposed to enhance Mind Magic. I just think it's pretty."

  


Mirian picked up the thin circlet. Made from an almost translucent white blue moonstone, it reflected rainbows when the light hit it. True to it's name, it had dragons carved all around it. Each dragon held the next one's tail, and no two were the same. Mirian had thought dragon's had wings, but these didn't.

  


"Here's me in my dress! Would you hand me three of the hawk and horse chains and two of the crystal strings, please? Thank you." Windstar quickly braided the chains into her hair, adding a very subtle glimmer to her hair with the crystals and an impression of movement with the flying hawk and running horse charms. She had chosen a lovely ice blue robe and breeches combination, with open, flowing breeches of pale blue, a matching shirt, and over it she wore a slightly darker vest robe that reached her calves, with silver embroidery covering it. Another example of hertasi work, the embroidery looked different from different angles. From one angle, Mirian could see soaring hawks, but from another angle she saw the winged horse of Valdemar, and from yet another angle, it looked like cascading silver waterfalls. On top of all of this, Windstar placed her dragon circlet. She looked like a princess from a far away land, made of ice and steel.

  


"How do I look, Mirian?" She asked.

  


"Like a frozen waterfall, my dear. Absolutely beautiful."

  


"Do I look sufficiently Valdemaren with the horse motifs, but also sufficiently Tayledras with the style? I don't want to show favoritism or anything, somebody would get offended. I have to 'properly represent two peoples united' after all."

  


_'Poor Windstar. Thrown into the political maelstrom almost before she can walk, and used as a symbol of a very important alliance.'_

  


"You look perfect, Windstar. Now off with you, or you'll be late."

  


Windstar sighed. She didn't like Court parties. "I'll see you tomorrow, Mirian. I'll probably be up late tonight, playing the sweet child, while still being thought of as a symbol."

  


Mirian frowned in sympathy. "You'll do fine, little one. You always do. Goodnight."

  


~

  


"Mother, I hate using my daughter as a symbol. She doesn't want to be here; the Court life is suffocating her. She needs something new, something different from what she has now! She's no more suited to being a Court flower than I or Darkwind!" Elspeth said. She was frustrated. She knew she needed to get her daughter out of Haven for a while, but she didn't know how to find an excuse to leave her teaching duties for a while. Then again, Windstar needed Mage training badly, and she needed the kind of two on one training she and Darkwind couldn't give her with their other training duties. 

  


Elspeth tried again. "She needs to be away from here, she's never going to get properly trained with all the people she knows constantly pestering her. She, Darkwind and I need to get away for a while to train her properly, and dammit, I would like to spend some family time with my family!"

  


Selenay grimaced. She couldn't think of a good reason to send the small family elsewhere for a while, and she needed a reason to send two of the best Mage teachers away. She felt like she was in a trap she couldn't escape. It wasn't a nice feeling.

  


"Elspeth, Darkwind, I need a crystal clear reason to send you away, I-"

  


The Queen's Own, Talia, interrupted Selenay. "Selenay, if I may interrupt, I think I have a perfectly good reason for Darkwind and Elspeth to leave Haven for a while. Assuming, of course, " she said, looking at the two, "They are willing to act as ambassadors, and Elspeth is willing to take on an intern." Elspeth opened her mouth to protest, but Talia cut her off. "Hear me out, Elspeth. I know you don't want to take interns, but I think you may take exception to this one. Princess Lyra got her Whites a week ago, and unlike Kris she is going on a field internship. If you take her on your ambassadorial trip with you, she'll get the experience she needs, you'll be away from Haven, and Windstar will get whatever she needs. Sound good?"

  


Darkwind looked at Elspeth. :_What do you think?_: he Mindspoke. :_It sounds like a decent plan to me. A lot of work, but we'll get to go somewhere else. It'll help cure us of our cabin fever, at least._: Elspeth frowned. "Exactly where would we be going? I'll tell you what, I don't want to go North."

  


Talia smiled. She looked at Selenay. "I believe we need an ambassador to the Kai-ling Empire. It's one of the far Eastern States that the Empire couldn't overtake. The Empress has expressed interest in an alliance with us, as we a aligned with her friends in White Gryphon. You would certainly be gone long enough for Lyra's internship. It's a month long ride on Companions just to get there."

  


Elspeth and Darkwind looked at one another again. Darkwind said, "We'll have to ask Windstar what she thinks. She-" 

  


Windstar jumped down from her perch in the window frame. The adults in the room started, they hadn't noticed her there. She looked like a ghost in her shimmering pale garments. She regarded them with silvery eyes.

  


"Sounds like an interesting excursion to me," she said. "Do you think one of the Companions would be willing to carry me? Dad's got Sikeny, she always agrees to carry him. But would any of them carry me?"

  


Elspeth smiled. She was getting an earful from Gwena, who was asking her why she allowed Windstar to think the Companions didn't love her. "I'm sure one of the will bear you, Windstar. From what Gwena tells me, they'll be lining up for the privilege." She smiled at her daughter. She looked at Darkwind. :_Would you be okay with this, ashke? It sounds like a good idea to me._: Darkwind smiled. :_Elspeth, I said before I thought it was a good idea. Let's go. It should be fun._:

  


Elspeth looked at her mother. "We'll go," she said. Selenay smiled. 

  


Windstar looked at them. Her brows furrowed, she looked hopefully at her mother. "Does this mean I don't have to go to the party tonight?"

  


Elspeth sighed, then smiled. "No love, we have to suffer the party together."

  


Windstar scowled. 

  


  


~*~*~*~ 

  


  


Windstar wondered through the wooded part of Companion's Field, skipping lunch to avoid the company of the other Palace children. Sunlight shone all around her, but she had chosen the darkest part of the little grove of trees as her hideout. There was a hollow under one of the trees where a flexible person could hide out of sight.

  


Windstar looked up at the trees surrounding her. "Why do they hate me so much?" She asked the trees. "What about me is so distasteful that they all hate me?"

  


She looked down at the crumpled note in her hand. _'There's no room in Valdemar for a half-breed freak. Why don't you just die, so the Palace won't be so cursed?'_ A lone tear fell from her eye. She sniffed, and wondered _'Why? I may be a half-breed freak, I'll give them that. But I'm not cursed, am I?'_ Windstar looked down at her right wrist, where a strange birthmark lay on her skin. It showed a silvery crescent moon and a golden half sun placed together to make one large circle, half moon, half sun. The moon was closest to her hand. _'Am I cursed?'_ She decided to ask Mirian next time she saw the maid. Mirian knew everything, and always had time for her questions. _'Not like my parents. They never have time for me. Maybe they hate me too.'_

  


The bell tolled, calling Windstar back to classes. She sighed and stood up. _'None of the other children my age have to take as many classes as I do. It's not fair!'_ She ran across the bridge to the Palace complex. _'I just have to get inside. Then the others can't bother me.' _

  


This thought came too late, however. Just as she rounded the corner, she was cornered by three noble boys. 

  


"Why look, boys, it's the mutant." the tallest boy said. "You know, in some countries they've taken to killing the unusual children born after the Storms. They're often not quite human, you know."

  


"She certainly looks more spirit than human to me," another boy said. "There are no white haired mages anymore. Their kind became useless after the Storms. Or at least that's what they say." He sneered. "Ask your parents, little girl. Are they really as weak as they say, or are they just hiding their power for secret things?"

  


Windstar faced the tallest boy. The insults about her humanity were normal, but few Court bullies had the nerve to insult her parents. 

  


"What do you know about Mage craft, brat? You couldn't recognize a mage if your life depended on it!" She said loudly.

  


The tall boy stepped back the second she said "brat." He narrowed his eyes at Windstar. He exchanged a look with the two other boys and nodded at one of them, who ran around the corner. He gave Windstar a nasty smile.

  


"I may not be able to recognize a mage, little creature, but I do know how to tell if you're human or not. Humans have red blood." He pulled a knife out of somewhere. "Do you have red blood, little mage?" He reached for her.

  


Windstar tried to run away, but the remaining boy pinned her to the wall with his superior weight. She saw the knife coming towards her cheek, inch by slow inch. The boy holding the knife was grinning with a savage grin. The knife inched closer to her face. 

  


_'I'm about to be skewered by a cheese knife,' _Windstar thought, panicked. She was shaking all over. The knife inched in closer, and she closed her eyes, struggling. She tried everything she could think of to get loose, but none of the moves she knew worked. The bigger boy kept her pinned. She panicked, flailing about, getting nowhere.

  


Then the knife touched her skin. Her eyes snapped open and focused on the knife. She knew nothing except the fact the knife was about to draw blood. She focused all her being on the knife. Magic flowed out of her and into the knife. She willed it to be something else, anything else. A second later, the boy holding the knife swore. 

  


"Damn! It's freezing to my hand!" He pulled the knife back, shaking his hand. The knife stuck, frozen to his hand. "Stop it, demon! Let go!" 

  


Windstar couldn't hear him. Her ears were roaring, and she knew she'd lost control. She felt nothing but cold and pain. She looked passively at the boy, shaking his head and swearing. She blinked once, then knew no more.

  


The boys swore more as she collapsed into a heap on the floor, rings of frost forming around her.

  


~

  


Elspeth was pacing up and down the Healer's hall, pale with fury. 

  


"What the hell happened?" She bellowed at couple in front of her. These were the parents of the boy who had tried to stab her daughter. "How could you allow him to be so close minded? What were you thinking, allowing his bullying to go on like this? You got three notices last year alone about his behavior, and yet you did nothing! Now my daughter is in shock, because your bully of a son tried to stab her!"

  


The boy's mother flinched and opened her mouth as if to say something, but her husband spoke first.

  


"Tried to stab her, woman. My son didn't intend to do your daughter any harm. He was just, ahh, curious, shall we say. Your daughter isn't exactly normal, you know."

  


Elspeth's eyes bulged. "Curious," she spluttered. "Curious? Not normal?" She closed her eyes and shook her head. "If he was curious, don't you think he could have talked to Windstar? I'd say he was malicious, I think he had every intention of hurting her. As for not being normal, what exactly is your definition of normal, Lord Berick?"

  


Lord Berick's eyes moved quickly, flashing from his wife, to the room the Healers were keeping his son, then back to Elspeth. He shifted his weight slightly then said, "Well, Lady, there's some that think Mage children born after the Storms aren't quite right, if you understand. Like the Change children up North, only less obvious. They say they float around, sneaky and pale as ghosts. Of course, it's probably all nonsense, but there you have it." He turned. "Ah! Healer Faran! How is my son?"

  


The Healer looked warily at Elspeth then said, "He's got a nasty chill, and that knife froze right to his skin, my lord. We had to cut it off. There's someone Healing his hand right now. It should be fine. You can come see him if you like." 

  


Lord Berick smiled. "I think we'll do just that, Healer." He and his wife walked away, leaving Elspeth by herself in the long hallway. _'Not quite right?'_ She thought._ 'What is that supposed to mean? Windstar is a mage, but she's still a normal little girl. Same problems, same joys. I think.'_ Elspeth sighed. _'How can I know so little about my own daughter? It's good we're going on this ambassadorial trip. We'll have more time together there than we do here. Plus we can start training her in using her Gifts.'_ She sighed again. 

  


"There are too many things causing sighs today," Darkwind said, walking up behind her. "How is Windstar? Please say she is well."

  


Elspeth turned and wrapped her arms around him. "I don't know how she is yet, Darkwind. I only know she is with the Healers. That at least is comforting. She went into magical shock trying to defend herself."

  


Darkwind pulled out of her embrace and looked into her eyes. "It would seem we need to teach her how to defend herself physically as well as magically. Had she been a little more prepared," he trailed off, staring at a wall. He looked back at her. "This would never have happened in a Vale, Elspeth. I think we should leave Haven and go to my people, at least until Windstar is older. She would be safer there." 

  


Elspeth stared at him. How could he suggest she leave? She was sworn to Valdemar, she couldn't just leave for her own purposes. 

  


"We can't just leave, Darkwind! I have a duty to Valdemar-"

  


"You also have a duty to your family, Elspeth! We can protect ourselves from people who wish us harm, but Windstar can't do that yet! She needs the kind of two on one attention you know we can't give her here! I think we should stay away from Haven for a while after we return from the Kai-ling Empire. I think it would be good for her."

  


Elspeth stared. He was right, she did have a duty to her family, but she also had a duty to stay in Valdemar. She also knew Windstar wasn't getting anywhere near the amount of attention she needed. She had lost control of her Gifts today, and if she hadn't passed out, she may well have killed the boys who were bullying her. She rubbed her hands through her silver hair. "We have to make the best of the time at the Kai-ling Empire we can," Elspeth said. "After that, we just have to see what happens next."

  


Darkwind nodded. While not a permanent solution, the trip to the Kai-ling Empire would allow them time to think. 

  


The Healer in charge of Windstar walked up to Darkwind and Elspeth. He looked at them, then said, "Follow me, please." They did as were told, following the Healer. 

  


"Your daughter was in magical shock, as I'm sure you know," the Healer said. "When she was attacked, waves of cold flowed out from her. The servants who found her said she was lying in a circle of frost. She was extremely cold when they brought her here; she had icicles in her hair. We got her warmed up, she's awake now. It's probably safe to take her to your rooms now, as long as she stays there for a day or two." The Healer turned a corner and opened the door. Windstar was lying on her back in bed, her eyes fixed on the ceiling. 

  


Darwind and Elspeth rushed to the side of her bed. Windstar turned her head towards them, her eyes focusing on them. "Are those boys all right?" She asked desperately. "Did I hurt them?" Elspeth scowled, and Darkwind looked at his daughter and said, "They're fine, Windstar. Are you okay?"

  


Windstar let out her breath. _'Good,'_ she thought. _'I didn't kill them. I'd be even more of a curse if I was a murderer.'_ She looked at her father. "I'm okay, Father. A little cold, and kind of tired, but okay." She looked up at her parents. _'Why are they always here AFTER I need them, instead of when I need them?' _ She asked herself. _'Do they hate me too? Maybe they should. Only a baby loses control like I just did.' _ Windstar said, "I'm sorry I lost control like that. It was very stupid of me. I should have done better. Maybe they wouldn't hate me if I were better."

  


Darkwind grimaced. "Who hates you, ke'chara? Those boys were just bullies, they don't understand what it is to hate," Elspeth said. "What makes you think anybody hates you?"

  


Windstar looked at her with wide eyes. She silently handed her mother the note she had been reading before she'd been attacked. She watched as her mother read it, frowned, then handed it to Darkwind. Elspeth sat down on the side of Windstar's bed. "Windstar," she said, "Have you ever gotten any other notes like that one? I really need to know." Windstar looked at her mother. "I've gotten plenty of notes like that, Mother. They all say they hate me, say I'm cursed. Are they right, Mum? Am I cursed?"

  


Elspeth wrapped her arms tightly around her daughter. "No Windstar. Never let anybody tell you you're cursed, or evil, or a freak. You're just as special and wonderful as anyone else, never let anyone tell you otherwise, do you hear me?" Elspeth said to her daughter. "Never." 

  


Windstar pushed out of her mother's arms. "If I'm not cursed, Mum, why do I have this weird birthmark?" Windstar said, holding out her wrist to show the silver and gold moon and sun birthmark. "It doesn't look normal to me."

  


Elspeth's brows furrowed. "Windstar, I don't see any birthmark there. But even if you did have a birthmark, you wouldn't be cursed. Just because a person is different doesn't make that person bad. It just makes her unique."

  


Darkwind moved to Windstar's other side and wrapped his arms around his wife and daughter. He put his face very close to his daughter's ear.   
  


"Windstar, I know being different is hard. Your mother and I have been different all our lives, and it's not an easy thing, seeing others fit into society perfectly while you stand on the outside looking in. It will always be hard, but you can make it easier. Make friends, Windstar. The people who don't like you are a minority. The beautiful thing about Valdemar is that for the most part, people judge you on what you do and how you behave, not on the color of your skin or your religion or anything else. That is what makes this place so strong. Valdemar will bend, but it will never break, because of it's acceptance of others."

  


Windstar turned to look at her father with teary eyes. Darkwind met her gaze, seeing his reflection in her eyes. He felt as though she was weighing his words, searching his soul to see if he told the truth. She seemed satisfied by what she saw, for she broke eye contact with him. She looked at her lap. "Can we go to our rooms now?" She asked pleadingly.

  


"Of course, dearheart," Elspeth whispered. "Let's go home."

  


~

  


Eclipse wandered the woods of his father's keeping. His thin body slipped through the trees easily, and only a skilled hunter could follow his trail. He walked with no destination in mind, just wanting to get away from his life for a little while. 

  


_'A little while,'_ he thought bitterly. _'That's all I'll ever have. A little while. A little while to spend away from my studies. A little while to play. A little while to get away from my 'grand destiny.' A little while to live! Will I ever have more than a little while?'_

  


The boy continued to walk. He had tried to run, once. He had wanted to run away from his father's dictation. He didn't want to learn mage craft, mage craft that his father had given him before he was born. He didn't want his life planned for him. Unfortunately, he had no way af escaping. He still had the scars from last time he tried to run away. His father had branded a skull onto his left palm. He had said, "This is how farmers marked their livestock. If the cows run away, anybody can recognize the mark. I thought it would work for you as well. If you try to run away again, my servants will look for you, and find you using this mark. If you run away again, boy, you will have a lot more than a burn to worry about."

  


Eclipse sighed. _'I exist to do my father's bidding. I am a puppet, and I will always be a puppet. After I kill this girl-mage he obsesses about, he will either kill me or make me into his heir. I have no choice but to obey him. He'll kill my mother if I don't do as he says. So I have to kill what's her name, Windsun or Starwind, or something like that. Uhg.'_ His thoughts were not happy. He looked down at the brand on his palm, right under the birthmark on his wrist. He hated that birthmark. A silver half moon and a golden half sun, connected together to form a circle. The sun was closest to his hand, one of it's rays pointed straight at his father's brand mark. 

  


He scowled at his hand. _'Great,'_ he thought. _'An ugly brand and an equally ugly birthmark. How nice.'_

  


Eclipse heard a rasping voice calling his name. "Eclipsssse! Eclipssse, wherrre arrre you?" That would be his father's creature, Tathil. Eclipse hated the black lizard man. Tathil enjoyed causing pain. Particularly Eclipse's pain. "Eclipssse, it isss time forr you to come home. Your father wisssshess you to be within his ssssight."

  


Eclipse's face hardened. _'He doesn't wish my presence. He demands it. And I have no choice but to bend to his every whim. For pleasure or for pain, I am his. I am bound with unbreakable chains, bound to his will. I am trapped.'_ He looked down at the book he had been carrying. It was a new book, talking about the mage Ma'ar and his untimely defeat. His father had wanted him to read about his ancestor, making sure Eclipse knew his place in the long line of evil. Eclipse had hardly read the book, except for the part about An'desha. An'desha had helped overthrow Ma'ar, freeing himself from Ma'ar's terrible grip in an epic attempt. Eclipse should hate An'desha, but he didn't. An'desha represented everything Eclipse wanted. He broke free from evil and even now lived his life under his own steam. He had escaped evil. Eclipse stared at the book sadly. He let it fall slowly from his fingers to the ground, leaving it to the elements as he returned to the only place that welcomed him. His sanctuary, his prison. He sighed, looking over his shoulder at the book. _'There won't be any epic escape for me,'_ he thought. _'I am trapped. I can never escape.'_

  


_~_

  


A.N. Sorry for the shortness of this chapter. The next one should be up soon though. I'm also sorry for the speed growth of Windstar, but I promise she won't age ten years each chapter. Thank you for the reveiws, they meant a lot. Etcetera-cat, I will elaborate on the mage in later chapters, I promise. Shaelesand, I was born a month and a half early, and I was fine. With a healthy mother, often six weeks doesn't make that much of a difference.

Sage Twilight, thank you!

  



	4. Leaving

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


  


Mirian looked through the carefully folded clothing in the doe skin saddlebags. The ambassador from Kaki-Lang had told her the weather in his country was much warmer than in Valdemar. Mirian had packed mostly silk clothing for Windstar, with some light woven cotton for play clothes. 

  


"Robes, dresses, breeches, shirts, hair ties, ribbons, bells, crystals, and undergarments and sleep clothes. I do believe that's everything." Mirian double checked the fastenings on the saddlebags, to make sure nothing would fall out during the long journey to Kaki-ling. She then turned her attention to the tougher saddlebag that would hold Windstar's riding clothes, boots, and some heavier clothing should the weather in Kai-ling be colder than expected. 

  


"The leather breeches with the padded bottom, the cotton shirts, and the the Shin'a'in riding vest-robe. Very nice, it's all there."

Just then, Windstar walked in her door. She was dressed in tawny leather breeches, a white cotton shirt, and a sort of long vest with geometric patterns and lots of pockets. 

  


"I absolutely love these pockets, Mirian." Windstar said, thrusting her hands deep within her breeches pockets. "I have four pockets on my breeches, and six in my vest. I don't need saddlebags, I can carry everything on my person!"

  


Mirian grinned. It looked like Windstar had tried to do just that. The pockets on the outside of her thighs bulged, and the vest hung heavily against her body, born down by the weight in the pockets. "Windstar, what on earth do you have in those pockets?"

  


The girl looked at Mirian. She started pulling things out of the pockets, naming them as she went. "A water container, a rain hat, a pair of specs to keep the sun out of my eyes, some bandages, bruise healer, some dried fruit, dried meat, and a trail dagger." She grinned. "Everything I need to survive. Kero gave them to me."

  


Mirian laughed. "I've no doubt Kerowyn gave all that to you, lass. Only a mercenary would think of carrying all that around in her pockets. If you really want to carry it all, be my guest."

  


Windstar grinned. "I will! I love pockets! All my clothing should have pockets!"

  


"You'll have to take that up with Grith, child. That little hertasi will be going with you, Rymeer will be caring him in the gryphon transport basket." Marian smiled at Windstar. "You're all packed, little one. It's time to get out there and go!"

  


Windstar stopped smiling. She ran to Mirian and wrapped her arms around the maid. "I wish you could come with me, Mirian. I'll have no friends without you!"

  


Mirian frowned. "You'll get along fine with the others, Windstar. There's your parents, and Rymeer, and Grith, and your Aunt Lyra. You'll be fine. Plus, There's Herald Jovel, so you can't possibly have no friends!" 

  


Windstar sniffled. "But I don't spend as much time around them as I do around you. I like you, I want you to come with me!"

  


"Windstar, I have to stay here. I'm needed at the Palace. You'll be with lots of people who love you, I'm sure you'll forget all about me in no time."

  


Windstar drew away from Mirian, looking shocked. "F-forget about you? Never, Mirian! I couldn't forget about you. You've always been there for me when I needed you! I couldn't just forget you!"

  


Mirian blinked. She was touched by this speech from her charge. "Oh, Windstar, thank you. I won't forget you either, I promise. You need to go now, or you won't be able to leave today." She picked up the three heaviest saddlebags and walked out the door, hiding her eyes as she wiped the tears from them. 

  


Princess Windstar would be missed.

  


~

  


_ :You have to understand Mero, Windstar is a very special case. I don't know why she's so different from the other mages, but she is. You need to be very careful around her.:_

  


Rolan huffed. Gwena was right, there was something very strange about Princess Windstar. She didn't quite fit in to any of the categories of normal, in fact, she didn't quite fit in anywhere. She simply did not fit into his plans!

  


Mero snorted._ :I can see she is different, Gwena. I'm not blind, though I may not be Grove born. I am simply carrying the girl to Kai-ling. Elspeth and Darkwind can handle anything that could go wrong, assuming I fail my duty, which I won't!:_ The young stallion was offended. He was perfectly capable of dealing with the young mage, and he resented Gwena's assumption that he was ignorant and foolish._ :I'm not Choosing her, I'm just serving as transport. Stop treating me like a colt; I am too old for coddling now. Windstar is just a child, she can't do anything that I couldn't run from if I needed to. Or have you forgotten that I know how to run?: _

  


Gwena reared a little, bring her head above Mero's for a moment._ :Don't be stupid, Mero! Windstar is a full Adept, and a mostly untrained one at that. You have no idea how dangerous an untrained mage can be!:_

  


Mero stamped a hoof impatiently. _:Actually, I do have some idea, Gwena! I-:_

  


_ :Enough,:_ Rolan said._ :Gwena, I think Mero has a decent idea of what mages can do. Mero, you're a smart one, and you'll undoubtedly be an asset to us later in your life; but that depends or your staying alive. If you begin to feel stirrings from Windstar, tell one of the others immediately, and if Gwena gives you an order, you obey her. Do you understand?:_

  


Mero raised his head . _:Yes Rolan. I understand perfectly. I understood the moment I volunteered for this job.:_

  


Rolan nodded._ :Very well. Off with you, then. See you when you return.:_

  


Mero nodded once then cantered off to the stables to get his traveling saddle. Gwena turned to Rolan. 

  


_ :I am worried, Rolan. I do not understand Windstar. Her magic is strange to me, and her thought process is rather self-destructive. An uncontrolled self-destructive mage child is not a good thing. I fear for her.:_

  


Rolan bowed his head, his eyes moving rapidly back and forth. His ears twitched as though he were listening to something. When he finally brought his head up, he looked tired._ :Just try to protect her, Gwena. I cannot think of anything else you can do. Return to us safely, little one. Goodbye.:_ With that, Rolan trotted off, deep in thought. Gwena was left alone. 

  


_ :I don't understand it. I don't understand it at all.:_

  


~

  


"Do you have everything ready, Windstar?" Darkwind asked. "Are you ready to go?"

  


Windstar looked at her packs. "Looks good to me, Father. Mirian did most of it for me, she said I'd be sure to forget something, so she might as well do it for me." 

  


Darkwind smiled. "Knowing you, Windstar, I have no doubt you'd forget something. Probably your head," he teased, ruffling her hair. "That's all right, I'd forget my clothing if people didn't scream when I walked out of the door naked." 

  


Windstar erupted into giggles at this statement. Elspeth chose this moment to say, "They wouldn't scream, ashke. They'd ooh and aah over your magnificent person." Windstar doubled over, laughing even harder. Elspeth looked offended. "Well, it's true!" She said, causing Windstar to laugh even harder. Elspeth looked around. "I think we have everything. I'm going to miss this place. I hope we can come home soon. Are you ready, Windstar?" 

  


Windstar groaned. "The answer was yes three minutes ago, and it's still yes now. Where's Herald Jovel? He's coming with us isn't he?"

  


"He'll be outside with the Companions, Windstar. We need to go fetch Lyra, then we'll be off!"

  


Darkwind smiled. "Well, let's go fetch Lyra then! The sooner we're off, the sooner we get there, the sooner we can come home."

  


The door opened, and Princess Lyra walked in. "You don't have to fetch me, I'm quite quite capable of coming on my own. So here I am! Let's be off!"

  


The others stood up, the adults gathering up the saddlebags that hadn't already been taken up by the hertasi and walked out the door.

  


They met Herald Jovel outside. A tall, grizzled man with dark gray hair, he made quite an image in his Whites. He was one of the Heralds who had wanted to keep his old fashioned whites. The hertasi hated this to no end, but Jovel was more comfortable with his old Whites. 

He surveyed the group coming towards him. _:What do you think, Lumiri?:_ he asked his Companion. The mare looked carefully at the group. _:I think we have quite a group, Jovel. An heir, an Adept from afar, a headstrong former princess, and the Wind of the Stars. A weapons trainer,_: she said, nodding at Jovel. :_A giant lizard, a creature straight out of legend, and us,:_ she looked at the other Companions._ :A group to turn heads, we are.:_

  


Jovel nodded._ :Indeed, White Lady. That we are.:_

  


Lyra walked straight to her Companion, Marwek, who was standing right next to Lumiri and Herald Jovel. She attached all of her saddlebags where they were supposed to go, checked Marwek's tack, and then rechecked everything again. Jovel smiled. 

  


"Do you have two sets of clothing, youngster?" Jovel asked Lyra. 

  


She nodded vigorously. "I have five sets of formal Whites, plenty of-"

Jovel nodded. "That's fine. Do you have a bedroll, a spare pair of boots, and some Healing supplies?"

  


Lyra nodded again. "I have-"

  


Again, Jovel interrupted. "Do you have a weapon, your Companion, and your head?"

  


Lyra nodded.

  


Jovel grinned. "Then you, Princess Lyra, are more prepared than most interns."

  


Lyra gaped at him. "But what if I forgot-"

  


"Not important. You have the raw basics and a good head on your shoulders. That will get you further than all the supplies in the world."

  


Lyra blinked. "Oh." 

  


Elspeth was supervising Windstar's attachment of her saddlebags. The Companion who had volunteered to carry her, Mero, was trying his hardest to be patient. 

  


"No Windstar, you want to put the things you know you'll need as close to you as possible. That way, when you need them, you won't have to dismount to find them."

  


Windstar nodded. "That makes sense. Where do I put the stuff I won't need till we get there, then?"

  


A large male gryphon walked up to the group. "I will be carrying the things you will not be needing right away, youngling. They will go in the basket with Grith."

  


Elspeth smiled. "Yes, Rymeer, you get to play beast of burden on this trip. At least magic works well enough now that your carry basket weighs next to nothing."

  


The gryphon grinned at her. "That is true, Elspeth. A very good thing, that. If it were not for your students, you would be going to Kai-ling without spare underclothing!"

  


Elspeth laughed. Gwena nodded her head impatiently. :_Are we going to leave today, Chosen? I want to get to Kai-ling before high summer; I hear it's devilishly hot there in the summer months.:_

  


Elspeth swung up into her saddle. She watched as the rest of the group did the same. Mero knelt down a bit to help Windstar up for her first time. The girl scowled, Elspeth had the idea Mero was getting an earful about not treating his charge like a baby. Elspeth was silently grateful to the stallion, no matter how hard Windstar would try, the first days of this trip would be very hard on her. She was glad Mero had agreed to carry her daughter.

  


She looked back at Darkwind, who was also mounted on an unpaired Companion. He looked like he was having a wonderful conversation with the young mare. 

  


_ :Should I be jealous, ashke?: _Elspeth asked him jokingly._ :Losing you to another woman, am I?:_ The mare snorted, and Darkwind grinned._ :Not a chance, Elspeth. Ready to go?:_

_ :Ready as I'll ever be.:_

  


  
Elspeth sat up tall in her saddle. "Let's go!"

  


  


~*~*~*~

  


  


Windstar was getting extremely tired of traveling. They had been traveling for almost a month, and they still had a weeks worth of riding until they reached Kai-ling. She stared at the back of Mero's head.

_ :Mero, my rear is so numb I can't feel it anymore,:_ She told her transport.

  


Mero snorted. _:That is an improvement from a few weeks ago, little one. Remember when you hurt so much you couldn't sit? Not being able to feel your rear is an improvement.:_

  


Windstar smiled. _:That is true. My riding has gotten mush better during this trip.:_ Suddenly she scowled. _:Shame I haven't improved anywhere else. I'm still terrible at self defense, and I still can't do anything with my magic!:_

Mero didn't reply. Windstar had been growing increasingly frustrated with her situation for the last few days. She was terrible at self defense, there was nothing Mero could say to make that better. She had the talent for it, but she simply did not take the lessons seriously. She would pay very close attention for about half a candlemark, then her attention would wander and she would get a dreamy expression on her face. Mero had once asked what she thought about during these day dreams of hers. She had sat for a while with a faraway look on her face, then had told him simply; "I am living." Mero hadn't the slightest clue what she meant, so he had just dropped the subject.

As for Windstar's mage lessons; well, Mero was no expert, but from the actions of Windstar's parents he could tell it wasn't going well. Windstar was a very headstrong child, and mage training was hard work. She was easily distracted, and once she got bored she did everything carelessly, hardly paying attention to her parents' teachings.

  


Mero stopped brooding and spoke to Windstar._ :Your training might go a lot better if you paid more attention to your teachers. Teachers can only teach students who are willing to learn.:_

  


Windstar scowled. She was very angry with her life right now._ :Well gee, Mero, if I wasn't so important to Valdemar, I wouldn't have to do all this training so early, now would I? I could wait a few more years at least! With magic the way it is now, I couldn't do any real damage, could I? As for self defense, I wouldn't even need it if I wasn't "Mage Princess Windstar, the political tool!" That's the whole reason I've been dragged off on this stupid escort! I could have just stayed at home with Mirian, but no, you people had to take me away from the one person in the world who always had time for me! Why should I cooperate with people when all they do is use me?:_

  


Mero missed a step and almost tripped on his own feet. He had expected her to be irritated with him, maybe even angry, but Windstar was furious. He wondered if Elspeth and Darkwind knew how angry their daughter was. Probably not-

  


_ :I'm sorry, Mero. I didn't mean those things. Forget it. I'll just have to try harder.:_ Windstar's voice in his head pulled him out of his brooding.

  


_:Windstar, you need to talk about your feeling to your parents. They need to know how you feel!:_

Windstar shook her head. _'As if my parents would care,' _she thought to herself. _'They're too busy being heroes to deal with their troubled daughter.'_

  


_ :I didn't mean any of that, Mero. I guess I just lost my head for a minute there. Forget it.:_

  


_ :Princess Windstar, you must talk to your parents! An angry mage is a danger to all of us!:_

  


Windstar snapped._ :A danger, you say! To you! Not a word about how I hate every moment of my life? Not a word about how I'm nothing more than a tool to anyone? How dare you?_ ::

  


_ :I-I didn't mean it that way, Windstar! I-:_

  


_ :You, you, you! What about me? What about forgotten Windstar, the person inside the tool's body? All my life, I've been used by other people! Even now, I'm being dragged to a strange land where I'll know nobody, no one will have time for me, and the one person who cares is back in Haven, a month's ride away! Talk to my parents, you say? My parents have no time for me! They only want another mage to help them with their stupid magic! They don't even know who I am! Nobody knows me! They all know the Princess! Nobody knows Windstar!:_

  


Mero was taken aback. She was right. Gods, she was right. They had taken a little girl far from her home, tossed her into an adult's training program, and neglected to bring the one person she trusted with them. No wonder she felt used. 

  


_ :Windstar, I'm so sorry. You're right. You have gotten an extremely sour deal from life so far. Help us fix it, please. Talk to us. We'll never know you if you don't talk to us. Talk to your family. Gods, little one, I'm so sorry.:_

  


Windstar's shoulders slumped. She hung her head._ :You're sorry for my life. So am I, Mero. So am I.:_

  


Mero halted. Herald Jovel and Lumiri had to turn quickly to not hit him._ :Windstar, you must talk with your parents. They need to understand.:_

  


Elspeth, Darkwind, and Lyra trotted up to them. "Why have you stopped?" Elspeth asked. "We still have a long way to go! We can't stop now."

  


Windstar shuddered slightly._ :See Mero? She just wants to do her job. She doesn't want to deal with me.:_

  


Mero blinked._ :Oh, Windstar, it is a joy to "deal with you." I for one want to help you, because I know you are worth helping. Now we must talk to them.:_

  


Windstar tilted her head._ :We?:_ She asked. 

  


Mero bobbed his head. _:We,:_ he said to her. To the group he said, _:Windstar needs to rest. She needs to have a family conversation. She is trying to deal with some difficult issues in her life right now, and she needs your help.:_ He looked Elspeth and Darkwind in the eyes, trying to will them to see their daughter's troubles. 

Elspeth rode closer to Windstar, Darkwind not far behind. She put her hand on the back of her daughter's head, forcing Windstar to look her in the eyes. Elspeth was shocked by the pain in her daughter's eyes. She frowned.

  


"What is wrong, my daughter?" 

  


~

  


Windstar sat with her parents under a big tree. The land had started to change about a week ago. Tall mountains lingered in the north, with more far to the south. They were on an enormous grassy plain with groves of large, thorny trees every now and then. The animals were getting unfamiliar as well. Great cats roamed the land, big ones with shaggy hair around their heads, and smaller spotted ones that ran with the wind. There were also large grey creatures with long faces and horns on their noses. All and all, Windstar felt very disoriented, and very far away from home.

  


She sat with her back against the part of the tree trunk that wasn't thorny. Her parents sat in front of her, and Mero sat on her right.

  


_:Tell them,: _Mero urged gently.

  


Windstar shifted slightly._ :How? I feel so stupid about it now. I wish I hadn't said anything.:_

  


Mero nudged her encouragingly. _:Tell them.:_

  


Windstar took a deep breath, then let it out. She took another deep breath, then said:

  


"You don't love me. You only care about me because I'm good political tool, and I will be a great mage. That's the whole reason I'm here instead at home with Mirian. You want to use the political tool I am."

  


Darkwind started. "That's not true, Windstar! We love with all our hearts! We always have!"

  


Windstar stared at him. "Then how come I only see you late at night and early in the morning? If you loved me, how come you never have time for me?"

  


Such a simple question, but Windstar could never know how much it hurt her parents. Elspeth took a shuddering breath.

  


"Valdemar needs us, Windstar. But that's no excuse. We should have made more time for you. We should have made you feel like less of a tool. How ever much I wish this wasn't true, Windstar, you have been used. It's partially our fault. But you have to understand, darling, that people look at you and see a link between two peoples, and a hope for a new future. I'm so sorry we couldn't give you a more normal life." Elspeth blinked furiously a few times. "I'm sorry that you feel nothing but used. Please tell us how we can make it up to you."

  


She looked at her daughter. Windstar stared back. "So I'm a symbol." It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

  


Darkwind nodded miserably. "Yes, Windstar. To your mother's people and to my people, you represent the bond between the two peoples. You also represent the new generation of mages. You are a very visible example of a new mage. But we love you for you. We always have, and we always will."

  


Windstar turned her stare to him. "You don't know me, father. You can't love me for me; you don't even know who I am."

  


Elspeth's shoulders slumped in defeat for a moment. She Mindspoke Darkwind._ :Gods, Darkwind, she's right. We don't really know our own daughter. She has every right to be angry with us.:_

  


Darkwind looked into Windstar's eyes. He had never felt so terrible in his life. He heaved a heavy sigh. "Maybe," he said to himself, his daughter, and his lover, "Maybe we can get to know you then, Windstar. The real you. Will you let us do that?"

  


Windstar looked at her parents. "It's a start," she said.

  


~

  


  


A.N. Whoa. I just reformatted the whole story. That took a lot more time than I thought it would. I thought since this story is rapidly turning into an epic, it would be best to put it in larger chunks, to make it less of a pain to read. There will be a lot more, folks. This is only the beginning of the story, and this story is only the beginning of a series. This story will introduce two characters that will be used later on in other stories. I hope all of you wonderful people stick with me for the ride. Thank you so much for your support so far! With my exams out of the way now, I will try and write more, I promise. Thanks again everybody!

Kestrel


	5. Learning

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


"King me!"

  


Darkwind sighed. He looked down at the game board. He was being beaten by his daughter in checkers. Again. He did as he was told, flipping the round game piece over to show the side imprinted with a crown. With only three pieces left on the board, Darkwind wondered if maybe he should just give up and admit defeat. Then he remembered Elspeth's laughter the first time he lost to Windstar. 'If I give up, I'll never hear the end of it,' he thought to himself.He put his hand on one of his pieces.

  


_ :I wouldn't do that if I were you, brother of mine,:_ a voice said in his head. _:Do that and she'll have you in one turn.:_ Lyra's mindvoice sounded amused.

  


Darkwind took his hand off the piece. _:What do you suggest I do then, genius?:_ Lyra rode up to be level with the hovering game board. She looked at the situation on the board. "I suggest you learn how to play this game properly, Darkwind," she said aloud. "Or else Windstar will always be able to beat you."

He scowled. "Why don't you play her then, Lyra? You grew up playing this cursed game."

  


Windstar grinned. "That'd be great, Lyra! Won't you play with me? Please?" 

  


Lyra smiled at her niece. "Aren't you trying to get to know your parents better? I wouldn't want to take up any of your time together."

  


"Yes, but I'm trying to get to know my family, Lyra. You're my aunt, I need to know you too!"

  


Darkwind looked at his sister in law. _:You've lost, sister. She won't give up until you play a game with her. She's very stubborn.:_

  


Lyra scowled at him. _:I wonder where she got that trait, hmm? Oh wait, I bet she got it from her parents. Call your daughter stubborn; that's the pot calling the kettle black.:_

  


Darkwind just shrugged, then looked down at the game board. He was dismayed to find all of his pieces gone; Windstar had just won another game. 

  


Windstar looked pleadingly at her aunt. "Please play with me, Lyra? Father's no good at it."

  


Darkwind mock scowled. "Well," he said in an over dramatic voice. "If that's how you're going to be, I'll just take myself to people who appreciate me more!" He rode over to Elspeth, who laughed at him and said, "I don't appreciate you more, love. I think it's hilarious that you just lost four games in a row to your ten year old daughter." Darkwind huffed and said, "Well at least Vree still appreciates me. He can see the genius inside." The bondbird looked oddly at his bondmate for a while, then looked in Darkwind's ear. He shook his head sadly at Darkwind. _:No genius.:_ he said solemnly. _: Only you.:_

  


Darkwind scowled at the bird. "Well thanks a lot, Vree. It's so good to know somebody thinks I'm special." 

  


Windstar did a big theater frown. "Oh, we made too much fun of Father. Group hug!"

Lyra, Elspeth, and Windstar converged on Darkwind, still on their Companions. They all joined in a big hug with Darkwind in the middle. "I always knew the women loved me, but I never knew I was this popular," he said, hugging all of them back. Lyra glared at him, Windstar giggled, and Elspeth kissed him. He leaned back slightly. "Ah, this is the life. Warm sun, cool breeze, and surrounded by beautiful women. What could be better?" He took a deep breath and frowned. "Has anybody else smelled something strange in the air today? It smells almost like the salt bogs next to the Vale where I was born." He looked around. "And where's Jovel? He usually doesn't just go off without telling anybody." 

  


The group hug broke up. "Where is Jovel?" Elspeth asked. She frowned. _:Don't worry, he's safe and nearby,:_ Gwena said. 

  


The group kept riding in the direction of Kai-ling. They were currently in a great grassy plain area with all kinds of strange animals. Great cats, huge beasts with horns on their noses, and strangest of all, enormous grey creatures with big ears and long noses. They were riding up a small hill. When they reached the top, everyone in the group stopped dead, slack jawed. 

  


Windstar was the first to regain her voice. "What is it?" she asked in wonder.

  


Elspeth just shook her head, mesmerized by the waves in the body of water many, many times larger than Lake Evendim. 

  


They heard hoof beats to the left of them. Herald Jovel and Lumiri came to them, looking as awed as the rest. "I am guessing, little one, that that is the sea."

  


Windstar nodded, her eyes fixated on the great blue expanse before her. Then she noticed a large bump in the smooth blue sea, quite far away. "What is that?" she asked, pointing to it. 

  


A shadow fell on them for a moment, then Rymeer landed next to them. "I believe that would be Kai-ling," he said. "It has been so long since I have seen the sea. I had not realized how much I've missed it." 

  


They all stood for a while longer, looking at the wide expanse before them, watching the sun glitter on the water's surface. Grith, the little hertasi who had agreed to come with them, finally broke the silence. "There is a ship waiting for us a few miles north of here," he told them. "If we go now, we can be off latter today."

  


Elspeth tore her eyes from the water. "A boat?" she asked dubiously. The boats in her land were little tiny affairs, with oars and used only for fishing. She thought the fisher folk of Lake Evendim had some other kind of boat, but those were very small as well, and not suited for traveling the distance between the island and where they were standing. 

  


Rymeer grinned a gryphon grin. "Not the kind of boat you're use to, my friend. Just wait till you've seen this ship. The People of Kai-ling depend on the sea for their lives, thus they depend on their ships. You will be perfectly safe. Long have my people tried to master boat building techniques, and we a very good at making safe boats. But for the Kai-ling, ship making is an art. Each ship is different, all are hauntingly beautiful. You will love them, Elspeth. I think you will too, Windstar. Let us go. I wish to see our ship up close."

  


~

  


It was truly a magnificent ship. Made of a very dark wood, it was very long. It's long, sleek body rested gently on the surface of the water, the deck not far off the surface of the water. The boats of Elspeth's people were fat, round, and pudgy looking, with almost no deck space, powered by small sails and kept upright by the will of the gods. Elspeth had never seen a ship like the one before her. There were no curves to it; it seemed to consist of only strict lines and sharp angles. She could see stairs leading down into the bottom off the ship, where she assumed there rooms for sleeping and storage. She didn't know how this ship was to move, she didn't see any oars, but it didn't seem the ship had any sails on it's one mast. 

  


She looked at the man standing next to her, Captain Neroshi. Sent by the Kai-ling empress, he was one of the best captains in the military fleet. He noticed her looking at him. "Beautiful, is she not?" he said. "She is one of the _spinere_, the arrow ships. Fast as the wind, and almost impossible to tip over." He smile at her. "Her name is _Fencaeshan."_

  


Elspeth was glad that the dyheli had been able to transfer the Kai-ling language to her and the others in her group. It was so different from any other language she knew, she didn't know if she would have been able to learn it without the dyheli. There were fewer words in the vocabulary than in Valdemaran, but each word could mean many things depending on the accent, the words around it, and the ending attached. Even with the dyheli, though, she didn't understand the name of the ship. She looked at the captain with the question in her eyes. 

  


He studied her, then he smiled. "_Fencaeshan_ means 'Sky Lark,' lady. She is my love. She is a wonderful ship."

  


Elspeth looked at him. "Are all ships 'hers'?" she asked. 

  


He nodded. "Look at her, my lady. Do you think anything like her could ever be a him?"

  


She studied the ship. "No. Definitely a her."

  


Captain Neroshi grinned at her. "Would you like a tour? She is as magnificent inside as she is out."

  


Elspeth looked over to the dock where Darkwind, Lyra, and Jovel were helping the _Fencaeshan's_ crew load the ship's cargo. The Companions were reclining on the beach not far away, waiting as long as possible to get on the ship. Rymeer was currently up in the air, enjoying the ocean wind. Grith was helping with the loading. That left Windstar, who was not strong enough to load the ship, standing by herself watching the people move around her. Elspeth smiled to herself.

  


"Windstar!" she called. Windstar turned to look at her. "Would you like a tour of the ship?" 

  


Windstar nodded vigorously, running up to Elspeth and Captain Neroshi. She presented herself to them, grinning from ear to ear. Captain Neroshi smiled again. "Well, let's be off, then!" 

  


He led them down the plank onto the ship, so they were standing on the deck. "Would you like the official tour, complete with sailor talk, or would you like the tour where I show everything you need to see and tell you what it is?"

  


Elspeth looked at Windstar. She would love the official tour, but she didn't think Windstar was up to it, so she said, "How about the second one?"

  


Captain Neroshi smiled. "Okay! Well, right now, you're standing on the deck. Over there is the steering system, we can control everything that happens on the ship right there." He led them to what looked like a long stack of flattened poles made of the same dark wood the ship was. "Here is the sail. It's down right now so that we don't float away. When it's time to leave, we'll raise the sail and check the wind to see if we need to make our own wind or not." He walked to a low cabin and walked down a few stairs into the room. "This is my office and quarters. If you need me on our trip, I'll either be here, on the deck, or in the kitchen." 

  


Elspeth was studying a series of colored, knotted ropes. They glowed with magic, but she couldn't recognize their use. She turned to the captain. "What are these?" she asked, pointing to the ropes. Captain Neroshi smiled. "You noticed them! Excellent!" He walked to them. "These are the most valuable things on the ship, my lady. They are called _tesheri_, or wind ropes. He took one of the wall. "Just undo one of the knots, and you get wind from the direction you need. Red for wind from the south, blue for north, green for west, and yellow for east. The ropes with more than one color give winds from the southeast, northeast, so on. They are very useful."

  


Elspeth smiled. "I bet. I'd love to meet somebody who could teach me how to make them."

  


Neroshi blinked, then shrugged. "When we get to the homeland."

  


Windstar spoke up for the first time. "How long will it take to get to Kai-ling, Captain?"

  


Captain Neroshi smiled at her. "If everything works out well and we leave soon, we should get there early this evening. About three candlemarks for you. Just in time for you to get ready and go to dinner. Perfect." He walked out of the room. "If you'll follow me," he said, sweeping his arm. He walked to the stairs Elspeth had seen earlier. "Down we go." 

  


"Here we have the kitchen," he said, opening the door. "You said you have already eaten?" Elspeth nodded. "Right. Down this hall, we have the sleeping quarters. He opened one of the doors, showing them a room with a bed and a desk built into the walls. "We have four of those fancy rooms. We almost never use them. " He walked further down the hall. "The crew sleep in these rooms," he said, opening another door. They saw two beds on each wall, one above the other. He walked further down the hall. "Usually, we would keep weapons and such in these rooms, but since we're on a diplomatic mission, they're all empty." He opened several doors, showing them the large empty rooms. He looked at the two females with him. "The Empress thought it would be best if there were no weapons on this ship. She was quite adamant." He smiled ruefully at them. "We don't even have food knifes. You should feel safe."

  


Elspeth smiled. She was impressed with the effort these people had made to make them feel safe. She was glad, it seemed they really wanted this alliance and she would be more than happy to help it work. 

  


Captain Neroshi pointed further down the hall. "Down there is where we keep foodstuffs, medical supplies, the stuff that we need for staying alive. I'll show it to you if you want, but it's very uninteresting. We should be leaving soon, would you like to go up top to get ready?"

  


Elspeth nodded. "That would be good. I would like to get going as soon as possible."

  


He smiled at her. "Well, we should be leaving within half a candlemark."

  


~

  


A candlemark later Darkwind and Elspeth stood at the front of the ship watching as the water rushed past underneath them. The ship sped forward powered by the wind invoked by one of Captain Neroshi's wind ropes. The sun shone down on them beautifully, they had full bellies; and with the gentle rocking of the ship Darkwind felt ready to go to sleep.

  


Elspeth leaned against her lover. "It's beautiful, isn't it love?" she sighed. "I can hardly wait to see the mainland."

  


Darkwind's eyelids drooped slightly. "I like it here on this ship. I would be very happy to stay here the whole time. The rocking is very peaceful." 

  


Elspeth smiled. She admired the island rising on the horizon in front of her. "I wonder how big the whole island is," she said sleepily.

  


The ship's 'first mate' walked up to them. She was an angular woman, much like the ship itself, with a wide face, tan skin, dark hair, and odd, slanted dark eyes. Her face showed little as she neared them. "Captain Neroshi thought maybe you would be having questions about the homeland, lord and lady." she said to them. "Is this so?"

  


Darkwind blinked. "Yes, actually, we have many questions. For one, how big is the whole island?"

  


The woman looked considerate. "Your people are measuring distance how? In leagues, perhaps?" Elspeth nodded. "Good. The island is about fifty leagues wide at it's widest, then about three hundred leagues long. It is not the only island, however. The one you see now is the largest of the islands, called Kai-shi. Our capital is located on that island, near our greatest sea port. The port is called Ularng, it is located where Kai-shi's greatest river flows into the sea. The capital is called Shae-kiyn, it is the third largest city in our country."

  


Darkwind nodded thoughtfully. He looked at Elspeth to see if she had any questions. She did.

  


"You said there are other islands. How many other islands?"

  


"Well, all told there are about three hundred island. Many of those are not suitable for living. There are nine main islands, islands where there are major cities and large populations. Kai-shi is the largest, and it is closest to the mainland coast. The two other very important islands of Kai-ling are Kai-hiro and 

Kai-mishron. Kai-mishron is the second largest island, it is used mostly for farming and producing the food Kai-ling cannot get from the sea. Kai-mishron is not a very large island; it is where many of our richest families live. It's actually not that nice a place to stay, the monsoons there are terrible. We common folk say it is where people with more money than sense live." The first mate grinned at them. "Kai-mishron is very near Kai-shi. It acts as a very good shield from monsoons. The rich protect our Empress from the winter storms with their own houses. How kind of them.

  


"Many of the oldest families of Kai-ling hold their own islands. They are like little lands in and of themselves, able to govern themselves to a certain extent; they must follow the High Law, but they may add more laws if they wish. A lord can challenge High Law, if he or she has good reason to, and our judges will see if the challenge is just or not, and if it comes to that, the judges may decide to overturn the High Law." She looked at them. "I'm sorry! I'm probably boring you to death with my ranting!"

  


Elspeth shook her head rapidly. "No, not at all! This is fascinating. How may a Judge overturn the High Law, may I ask?"

  


"Well, if a challenge of the law is brought before our judges, they will hear the challenger out, then a chosen representative for the High Law will tell the court the law's ways. There are five judges, we call them _Judicea_. When both sides of the argument have been heard, the _Judicea _will retire and think the issue through, each one taking time to carefully meditate on the solution. When each has come to a conclusion, they consult with one another to decide what to do. If they decide to overturn the High Law, then the offending part of the Law must be rewritten. They will have no more to do with it than that. If the new law is challenged again, they will go through the same process again. The court cannot write it's own laws."

  


Darkwind was very impressed. It seemed like a very good way to handle law to him. He asked, "How are the_ Judicea _appointed?"

  


"They are elected every three years by the people of Kai-ling. As you can imagine, this means the opinions of our court never stay the same for long. If someone is elected to the court who is completely incompetent, the other four judges can remove that person and appoint a replacement until the next election. Rarely do the people of Kai-ling appoint incompetents, though. We cannot afford to. The court can challenge the word of the Empress herself; it would not do to have idiots in those positions."

  


Elspeth was very interested with this. She wanted to here more about the court and it's workings. She led the first mate down to the kitchen. "Let's go sit down so we can have a good chat, why don't we?"

  


~

  


Grith basked in the sun on the deck. He loved the sea. Before he left White Gryphon, he had been a sailor. He had like Valdemar, but the sea was his true love. He loved the gentle rocking of the boat beneath him, the shimmering of the sea, the smell of the air.... He had missed it.

  


Windstar sat near him. She had been feeling very strange since she set foot on the ship. She couldn't place how she felt, but she didn't like it.

  


Grith looked at her through half-lidded eyes. "What do you think of the sea, young lady?" he asked her. 

  


The young mage stared at the water. "It's very pretty. So is the ship."

  


Grith didn't notice that her answer was a lot shorter than it would have been normally. "It is beautiful, isn't it?" he said. "I love the sea. I love the way it smells, looks, everything about it! I also enjoy this ship. It has been a long time since I have felt the rocking of a boat."

  


Windstar looked slightly green.

  


"I remember being rocked to sleep when I was young; back, and forth, back and forth." 

  


Windstar paled and when several shades greener.

  


"I also remember being tossed around during storms. The deck rolled underneath us, like the floor was turning barrel rolls.... Windstar, what's wrong?"

  


Windstar shook her head, her hand over her mouth. She ran toward the side of the ship, leaned over the railing and lost her lunch into the sea.

  


Grith ran up beside her, checking her forehead for a fever. Finding none, he chuckled. "Poor Windstar," he said. "You have the sea sickness. It will get better after you get off the boat." He out his arm around her thin shoulders. "Next time, we'll get a Healer to give you something for it."

  


Windstar shuddered. "There won't be a next time, Grith. I'm never getting on a boat again." 

  


Grith chuckled. "I knew a boy who said the same thing when he first came on a boat. He turned out to be a fishing boat captain. He loved it, after the initial shock."

  


Windstar shook her head. "Never." She heaved again.

  


Darkwind noticed this and ran over, looking pale and worried. He came up on her other side. "Windstar, are you all right?"

  


"No! I feel like I'm dying!" she moaned.

  


Grith laughed. "She's sea sick, Darkwind. She'll be fine after she gets her feet back on the ground. It's the boat rocking, you see."

  


Windstar moaned. 

  


Darkwind smiled and patted her back. He looked to see Captain Neroshi walking to them. "Is something wrong?" He walked closer. "Ah, sea sick, is she? Poor mite!"

  


"How much longer until we get to Kai-ling, Captain?"

  


"About an candlemark and a half, sir."

  


Windstar looked at him like he had just killed her best friend.

  


It was going to be a long candlemark and a half.

  


  


~*~*~*~*~

  


"No boy, not like that, dammit! Your shielding is terrible! Do it again!"

  


Eclipse stared at his father. He had been working on his shields since breakfast; he could see the sun setting out the window. He couldn't remember ever being so tired. He tried to raise more magic to shield himself, but knew before he started that he had nothing left.

  


"No, no, no! How will you defeat your enemy if you can't even shield!?"

  


"Why should I care? I've never even seen my enemy! I don't even know what's she's done!"

  


His father narrowed his eyes. "You think you can talk back to me, boy? I, who have made you all that you are? Wrong." He hit Eclipse solidly on the jaw, knocking the boy across the room. Eclipse brought a hand up to his face, feeling his damaged jaw. He glared at his father. 

  


"Tell me why I shouldn't talk back to you. Why should I do as you say?"

  


The mage in black whom he knew as his father hardened. He grabbed Eclipse by the collar. "I made you all that you are, boy, and I can unmake you as well. You will do as I say, when I say it, and you will do it happily and without question!" 

  


"What if I say I don't care what you do? What if you do 'unmake' me? Surely it would be better for me if I were dead."

  


The mage laughed. "You may not care about yourself, boy, but never forget that your mother and you little sister lie in my castle, victim to me. Think how you would feel if your mother were to die, Eclipse. How would you like to hear your sister scream until she had no voice left? I could do it. I could do it right now." He turned towards the door. 

  


Eclipse jumped in front of him. "Don't you dare hurt them!" He screamed. The mage blinked. "Or you'll do what, Eclipse?" 

  


Eclipse blinked. "I'll, I'll, I'll kill you!"

  


His father laughed. "Will you?" He grabbed the boy's collar again, slamming him into a wall and knocking the breath out of him. His face was almost touching Eclipse's. "How?"

  


Eclipse turned his face away from his father's hot breath. "I don't know," he whispered. He wished he were anywhere else.

  


Another mind touched his. _:Wishes will get you nowhere, boy. Remember, there is no one but me to hear your wishes.:_ There was a horrible mental chuckle, and Eclipse moaned. "Get out of my head," he whimpered. "Please."

  


The laugh was both in his head and in his mind now. His father's body pressed him even further into the wall. A fist hit him hard in the gut, the again in the groin. Eclipse curled his body as best he could with his father pressed against him. His father's hands were on his shoulders, pinning him to the wall. "You should know better than to talk back to me by now, Eclipse. I will have to teach you a lesson."

  


"No," Eclipse whispered. "Please, father, no." He knew it was useless. "Father," he whispered.

  


The mage smiled evilly as power gathered in his hands. He was ready for his special spell. As he released the power and let it flow into the boy, he wondered what it felt like to have one's nerves set on fire. Then he remembered he didn't care. 

  


He invaded the boy's mind, leaving him no thoughts to himself. He brutally ripped through the child's head, leaving a battered, barely human mind in his wake.

  


Eclipse could only hear one thing through his screaming. His 'father' saying the same thing over and over again:

  


"Father's here, my boy. How do you like father's hug?"

  


~*~*~*~*~

  


A.N. Well, there it is folks. (reads Eclipse passage again) Sometimes I surprise myself with my own cruelty. Poor Eclipse. Don't worry, things will get better for him. Eventually. 

Windstar gets sea sick! Gotta hate that. Ugh. Thank you all for your reviews. I will try to post another chapter soon. I get really busy soon, I'm a CIT at summer camp, gotta chase little kids around, you know. Plus HARRY POTTER AND THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX COMES OUT SOON!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!! BE HAPPY!!!! REJOICE!!! 

(cough) I also write some Harry Potter fanfiction. I really need to get a life. Oh wait, this is my life. (looks around) I like my life! Don't send me to the shrink!

  


Disclaimer: Anything owned by Mercedes Lackey is owned by her, not me. 

  


  


  


  


  



	6. Understandings

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


Windstar sat with her back against the _Fencaeshan's _railing. Feeling utterly miserable, she quietly contemplated throwing herself into the sea. The only problem with that plan was there was no way she could stand. The world spun terribly every time she moved.

Grith sat next to her, telling her stories of his life on the sea. 

"I used to collect sea shells with my younger sister. We had four shelves full of them by the time I was your age. There were great huge shells shaped like horns, little clam shells of pure white, tiny pink crab shells, little brown shells.. My favorites were little, tiny round shells that were ugly on the outside, but when you turned them over and looked on the inside, they were a lovely purple color. Often, the pretties shells housed nasty creatures. There were truly beautiful shells that were inhabited by awful crabs with huge claws. I-"

  


He broke off at a groan from Windstar. She looked up at the hertasi, misery written all over her face. "Please, Grith. Kill me now. I can't take it any longer."

Grith grinned. He craned his neck to look over the railing. He smiled. "We're almost there, little one. I can see the buildings on the island now."

  


Windstar tried to look, but realized she couldn't move her head. _It's almost over,_ she thought. _Just a little while longer._

It was easy to say this in her head, but Windstar knew a 'little while' was too long.

  


~

  


The sea port of Ularng was a very busy place. There were ships docked everywhere. All kinds of things were being loaded onto or taken of of the ships. Elspeth saw one ship being emptied of yards of brightly colored silk, jewelry, and fine wooden chests. She turned her head slightly and saw fresh fish being placed in barrels full of ice and rushed away. She wondered where the fishers got the ice. Hay, grain, woods, spices, weapons, clothing, she even saw live trees being carried off one of the boats. 

  


Elspeth understood now why the people of Kai-ling were so passionate about their ships. From what Elspeth understood, each of Kai-ling's island contributed something to the whole Empire. If there were no boats to pass between the islands, the people would die. Each island was needed to complete the Empire; without one, the others would not work as well. 

  


The people at the port worked very well together. Each person seemed to have a duty to be performed, nobody stood around idly. The efficiency seemed to good to be true to Elspeth. She knew that no country the size of Kai-ling could not have people who went to waste, people who stagnated, causing unrest for the rest of the population. 

  


Another thing that amazed Elspeth was the cleanliness of the port. She saw very little waste anywhere. There were no garbage heaps in sight, no scum, no mucky build-up anywhere. It looked as though even the dock had been scrubbed. She looked around and saw people dressed in light yellow with buckets picking up trash. Elspeth was amazed by the machine-like efficiency of the place. 

  


Captain Neroshi lead the little group inland off the docks. The Companions walked alongside their Heralds, hooves chiming against the wood of the dock. Now that she was off the boat, Windstar felt much better. They had all changed into better clothing before leaving the ship. Darkwind was carrying her on his back through the crowds, so that her small form wouldn't be lost among the adults.

  


Neroshi led them off the docks, onto a paved road. The road led straight inland, following a large river. Elspeth could see where the road turned sharply, hiding whatever was behind the bend in the river. Neroshi turned and stopped them. 

  


"If you would like to ride the rest of the way to the capitol, you would be welcome. It is a short distance away, but we will get there sooner if we ride."

  


Elspeth looked at her group. "I'll think we'll ride, thank you," she said, sliding into Gwena's saddle. "How far is it?"

  


"It is about ten minutes if we ride, lady." Neroshi answered. He mounted a grey horse that was brought to him. "Follow me."

  


Elspeth and the rest of the group followed. Rymeer walked easily beside them, Grith on his back. Windstar watched her surroundings carefully from atop Mero's back. 

  


_:Mero, this is very different from home,:_ Windstar whispered with her mind. _:Everything here is so well ordered. It seems like everything has it's place. And the people are so quiet. At home, it's always so loud. I feel very strange here.:_ Mero nodded his head. The people were disturbingly quiet. He didn't know much about the Kailinese, but the calm of these people was unnerving. Mero couldn't remember ever being somewhere calm before. 

  


_:It is rather strange, isn't it,:_ Mero mused. _:They all seem so peaceful.:_

  


Windstar just shook her head. She thought it was wonderful. She wanted to know more about these people. _:Mero,:_ she asked. _:Could we ride up to Captain Neroshi? I want to ak him a few questions.:_

  


Mero wasn't sure he should walk in front of his elders, but it wouldn't hurt to ask a few questions, would it? He trotted up the line to Neroshi's grey mare. Gwena turned her head in surprise, but she let them pass. 

  


Neroshi started at the sound of hooves near him. He turned to look at Windstar.

  


"Princess Windstar," he said. "May I help you?"

  


Windstar nodded. "I was wondering, sir, are the people here always this peaceful? It seems very strange to me. I've never seen a place where everything is so ordered. Or so clean. Is it always like this, sir?"

  


Neroshi smiled at her. "Yes, Princess Windstar. It is always like this." He looked around him. "You say you've never seen a place where things are so well ordered. Tell me; do your people get most of what they need from the land around them? If you ever run out of something in one place, there will almost always be more of it somewhere else in your country, yes?"

  


Windstar nodded. Valdemar grew or raised everything it really needed, and her people could always turn to Hardorn or Karse if there was a shortage of something. 

  


Neroshi nodded. "I thought so. Look around you, Windstar. See how many people there are? There are almost more people in Kai-ling than our islands can support. That has always been the case here. We must use every piece of what we have if we want to have enough for everyone. We cannot afford to waste anything. That has become our religion. You see, if we were less disciplined, than we would waste more than we have to waste. Thus, we are taught discipline from the moment we are born. Discipline of the mind, discipline of the body, discipline of the soul. Our order is our strength."

  


Neroshi looked around at the Ularng seaport. "Look around at my people, Windstar. You see one large collective group, but you also see many individuals. Some are fishers, some are merchants, some are leaders. Each individual person contributes something. That is the order and the peacefulness you feel here. Most places you have been have probably preached self-sacrifice over self respect. Here, we believe that one must love oneself before one can love others. You should be what is most important to you. Self-sacrifice is all well and fine, but what can you offer the world if you have no self? A man is lost if he needs another's judgment to make him feel worthwhile. A man's greatest joy comes from himself. I am me, and whether or not I am happy should be my chief concern."

  


Windstar frowned. "That seems awfully selfish to me."

  


"Many foreigners say that. But think with me. If a man is not happy, what can he give to society? If what he does brings him no joy, then that which he produces will not be his best. Here, where we face a constant shortage of everything, we need the very best each person can bring us."

  


The small princess far from her home frowned again. It made sense to her, but it was very strange. In her land, she was told that she should value the lives and happiness of others over herself. Yet here was a man telling her that her own happiness and self worth should mean more to her than anything else. It went against everything she had ever been taught. She let Mero drift back to the back of the line. She heard a roaring in the distance, a sort of rhythmic pounding, and she let herself be lulled by the sound as she thought.

  


_:Did that make sense to you, Mero?:_ Windstar asked.

  


Mero shifted slightly under his saddle. He felt very confused. _:I am not sure, little one. It seems very selfish to me, this wanting your own happiness over all else. But it is true; the happy man works much better than the unhappy one. These ways are strange to me. I do not understand how one is supposed to make oneself happy at the cost of others. It seems wrong somehow.:_

  


Windstar was very intrigued by Neroshi's reasoning. Her brain was processing very quickly now. She said: _:Mero, I wonder. Does wanting to be happy mean by default that one makes others unhappy? You heard Neroshi, 'A man's greatest joy comes from himself.' The joy would not be coming from himself if he had to make others miserable to obtain happiness, would it?:_

  


Mero shook his head. His mind was overloaded. He thought what he was hearing went against everything he had been taught, but he was not sure. He remembered what one of his teachers had told him. 

  


_"Your happiness is not what matters. What matters is the safety of others. Your people should be your chief concern."_

  


Mero had been very depressed after that lesson. He had wondered why he should be expected to work for the rest of his life, facing injury, sadness, and maybe even death, without ever wanting anything for himself. His mother had told him that he was being selfish and dishonoring the Companions as a whole. 

  


Yet here was this man, saying that he should place his own happiness first. It went against everything he had ever learned, and yet..

  


And yet he knew he worked much better when he was happy. He ran faster, he thought faster and more completely; he generally had more to offer to his people when he was happy. 

  


_'Maybe it isn't so selfish after all,'_ Mero thought. _'If my being happy does not bring others down and makes me work better, perhaps it is better even for society when I am happy. I will have to think on this. I need to talk to Gwena.' _

  


Now that he had decided to talk to Gwena, he was more at peace. He picked up his feet and held his head higher. He looked at his surroundings again, and realized they had followed the river for about a mile.. The pounding sound had become louder, like the sound of water falling. There were many mountains on this island, the sea port of Ularng was one of the few places where the land sloped gradually into the sea. There was a bend in the road ahead, blocking their destination from view. 

  


The little group started to move faster. Windstar was very deep in thought. What Neroshi had said was making more and more sense to her. She tried to think of the people who had contributed something meaningful to the world in the past. She thought of the Blues, who created new and useful thing every day, not because somebody asked them to but because they loved the challenge. The Blues loved the process of discovering. That their inventions helped people was wonderful, but they created many things that were simply made for the love of creation, not only to be used. 

  


She thought of some Bards of the past, who where unknown in life but who continued to produce masterpieces because they loved the creating. That others hear and enjoy their works was not their greatest concern, they simply wanted to create, and if it made others happy that was and added bonus.

  


Finally, she thought of Firesong. Her 'uncle' as she called him had always told her about the joy of magic working, how as a Healing Adept, working magic was the most wonderful thing he could ever do. He had told her once:

  


_"Even if there were no people to benefit from my magic, I would do it anyways. The joy I get from working magic is indescribable. I love it. There have been a few times in my life where I have lost sight of that joy, and I was worthless during those times. There is nothing as beautiful as working magic, Windstar. It is wonderful that other human beings benefit from my work, but that is not why I do it. I do it because I would be miserable doing anything else."_

  


Windstar knew that many once thought Firesong a vain and selfish peacock. She knew that many people still thought that. But she also knew that Firesong had done many great things. If his love for his work made possible all the things he did, then why should everyone else not do what they love as well? 

  


She was jerked out of her reverie by gasps from around her. Startled, she looked around her. Her eyes were drawn to the front, and she knew she gasped as well. 

  


The rhythmic pounding noise had come from the many waterfalls plunging down from the mountain's cliffs. At the top of these cliffs, on either side of the waterfalls, even on little outcroppings of stone in the waterfalls, there stood a city. All of the buildings were beautiful, each one different than the next, each beautiful. The most astonishing building of all was on an outcropping of stone right in the middle of the many waterfalls. It seemed to rise out of the stone, while still being part of the elements around it. Looking almost like a blooming water lily, it was all lines and angles. It sat regally on the stone, surrounded on three sides by water and one side by empty space.

  


It was the most beautiful thing Windstar had ever seen.

  


~

  


The group from Valdemar gaped as the small boats that carried them moved toward the great building in the middle of the waterfalls. There were many little islands in the river before the waterfall, and every island was completed by a building. The buildings rose out of the water with the stone as if they had always been there, as though they were just continuations of nature's thought. They all seemed wonderfully in place and each one was different. 

  


Windstar wondered how she was going to sleep with the roaring of the waterfalls. She supposed she would find a way. Mero had his legs tucked up underneath him in the middle of the boat next to Gwena and Lumiri. He was talking to Gwena about Neroshi's speech.

  


_:He said that a man's own happiness should be his chief concern, Gwena. He also said that happy men give more to society than unhappy men. I've been thinking, and I think maybe he's right. I mean, I run faster and think better when I am happy. Would I not serve Valdemar better happy than unhappy?:_

  


Gwena narrowed her horse's eyes. _:You have it backwards, Mero. Better service of Valdemar should make you happy, not more happiness should make you serve better. Do not be selfish. You are not the main concern, Mero. Valdemar is.:_

  


_ :But Gwena, our greatest joys come from ourselves! Surely we are not to wait for our happiness to come from others.:_

  


Gwena was about to retort when Lumiri butted in to the conversation.

  


_:Perhaps the meaning of this, young one, is that we should not let our happiness depend on each individual we help. Rather, we obtain joy from the challenge of it all. What is more satisfying than figuring out how to deal with a difficult problem? Perhaps we are to gain happiness from the process of helping others, not only the end results.:_

  


Gwena blinked furiously. _:Lumiri, that's terrible! How can you say such a thing? Of course the happiness come from the happy people at the end of the toil! It is the happiness of others that makes it all worthwhile!:_

  


Lumiri looked into Gwena's blue eyes. _:Gwena, you are still young, though you do not wish to admit it. Think for a moment. Does your happiness depend only on the happiness of others? If that is so, why then do you not wish to share your lovers? Should not you son also be my son, and the son of all the Companions, belonging to each of us? Why then do you feel pleasure when you solve a problem that affects only you? If only the happiness of others matters, then why do each of us Choose only one Herald? If your happiness depends on others, why do you not share Elspeth with the rest of us, so we may all bond with her?:_

  


Gwena's head shot up. _:Lumiri! The bond between Companion and Herald is not something to be shared! It is sacred and cannot be touched by others!:_

  


Lumiri would have smiled if she could. _:Is that not a very selfish thought, Gwena? If we should care only for the happiness of others, then we should Choose every person we meet, so everyone knows the joy of the Bond.:_

  


_:But Lumiri, it doesn't work that way! Some people are made to be Heralds, some people are not! We cannot bond with everybody!:_

  


_ :Yes, Gwena. But you are still denying the masses your bond. I believe you have a right to do that. But that is happiness only for yourself. By your reasoning, that is wrong.:_

  


Gwena was silent for a moment. _:Fine!:_ she huffed finally. She turned her head to admire the water. Lumiri turned her head to look at Mero.

  


_:Gwena is very idealistic. She does not like to think of herself as selfish.:_

  


Mero nodded. _:I can understand that. But it's not really selfish, is it Lumiri? If I am happy, I serve Valdemar better. My happiness makes things work better. I achieve more by being happy, and by achieving more I become more happy. I do no harm by being happy. I do not cause anybody else misery. My joy comes from me, doesn't it?:_

  


_ :You are even younger than Gwena, Mero. When you understand better what you are preaching, then you will see that you cannot ask me what makes you happy. That knowledge comes only from you.:_

  


~

Darkwind looked around him, admiring the beauty of Shae-kiyn, capital of the Kai-ling empire. The Imperial Palace stood in the middle of the city, the bright middle of the flower that was Shae-kiyn. Darkwind had seen many cities in his life, he had never liked the huge stone boxes of the north, nor the oddly shaped buildings of Karse. Even in the Palace at Haven, he had often longed for the Vales, where the building were made to be part of their natural surroundings, not to fight nature like the buildings everywhere else. 

  


As he looked around him in the capital city of Kai-ling, he felt that he had finally found a people who understood the need to be part of nature. The buildings were like continuations of nature. They blended perfectly to the world around them, continuing the lines of the world around them. Darkwind thought that the Valdemarans would find these buildings plain, as there was on the buildings other than what was needed. The Kailinese used exactly what was needed on the buildings; nothing more. 

  


"It's very strange here, don't you think, Darkwind?" Elspeth whispered in his ear. She was looking around with a look of awe and intimidation. "I'm not sure I like it. It seems awfully plain."

  


Darkwind closed his eyes for a moment. He loved Elspeth, but sometimes she could be thick. 

  


"I think it's beautiful," he said to her. "It is beautiful in it's simplicity. See how the buildings use only what is needed? They are their own decoration. I think it sends a message."

  


Elspeth frowned, looking around her. "What message? That beauty is sinful, like all those radicals up north?"

  


Darkwind flinched. "No. That we are what we are, and that is what makes us beautiful."

  


Elspeth frowned. "How?"

  


"I believe you agree that the most beautiful clothing is also the most practical, correct?"

  


Elspeth nodded. "Yes, that's true.." She had no idea where Darkwind was heading. 

  


"And the most artful makeup accents what is already there, not adds extras, yes?"

  


"Yes..."

  


"So, these buildings are built for a purpose. They are for housing. What makes them beautiful is this: they are practical extensions of the land they occupy. They are like our clothing and makeup; they accent what is already there, while making life easier for us."

  


"But what does that have to do with being who we are and being beautiful because of it?"

  


"These buildings are what they are. They are houses. Nothing more, nothing less. There is nothing shameful about being a house, no reason to hide being a house behind carvings and paintings. These buildings are beautiful in and of themselves. They need no decoration to acquire acceptance. People accept and admire them for what they are."

  


Elspeth blinked and looked around her. "Oh." she said. "Okay..."

  


Darkwind sighed. She didn't understand. Not yet, anyway.

  


~

  


Windstar almost yelped as the boat hit the dock. The side of the boat connected with the dock with a thump, jerking her sideways. She tore her eyes from the water where she had been studying reflections to look at where she was going now. She almost gasped this time. 

  


They had stopped right at the front of the large lily-like building. As Windstar looked, she saw the lines and angles all seemed to fan out away from her, making her feel very small. She thought the building looked like it was part of the waterfall underneath it and the sky above it. It was made from polished black marble that reflected everything around it. The sun was setting behind it, and the building and the water around it were red, orange, and purple with reflected light. It was incredible.

  


Captain Neroshi led them to a set of stairs leading up into the building. At the top of the stairs was a set of double doors, made from the same black marble. As they walked up the stairs, the doors opened slowly. When they reached the top of the stairs, there were people waiting for them. In the middle of the group and slightly to the front was a small young woman. She walked forward as they moved towards her. 

  


Neroshi signaled with his hands for them to stop. The young woman came into the light reflected off the palace, showing her to be dressed in a simple red dress with a black overcoat. She had black hair tied into two loops on either side of her head. Her face was pale, her lips painted red, with her eyebrows and eyelashes painted black. She was very pretty, and seemed to fit in perfectly with the Palace.

  


She walked until she stood about ten feet away from them, facing Elspeth. She placed her hands together in front of her and bowed to them. 

  


"Greetings, honored guests," she said, rising from her bow. "It is a great honor to have you here. I thank you on behalf of my people for coming here. I am Empress Shikomi. It is my hope that when you leave here our peoples will be allies and friends."

  


Elspeth bowed back to the Empress. "It is an honor to be here, Empress," she said. "I hope all will go well during our visit. I am Herald-Mage Elspeth, a princess of my people. This is Darkwind K'sheyna, Ambassador from the Tayledras." She nodded to Darkwind. "Grith and Rymeer are here as guides and as representatives of the non-humans in our countries. And this is Princess Lyra, here to observe and learn about your people. She will work with me most of the time."

  


Empress Shikomi nodded. "This is good. I am glad for this chance at an alliance with your people. Now, I am sure you are weary from your long journey. Let the servants show you where you are to stay. I wish you a good rest, and I will see you again tomorrow for breakfast and meetings. Goodnight, and may you find it welcoming here."

  


~

  


The servants led them into the Palace. Windstar looked around with wide eyes. The first room of the Palace was very long. It seemed to stretch the length of the building. There were many doors on either side of the room, each with a different symbol over it. Windstar noticed that the door through which they were led had a white bird with blue wingtips over it. 

The door opened and they were led down another hallway. They were led up many sloping hallways. The building didn't seem to have any stairs, which was good for the Companions. Just as Windstar was getting tired, the servants slowed down. They were facing yet another door, one with a yellow and red flower over it. One of the servants opened the door for them, and then they were in a large semi-circular room with seven doors. Each door had another symbol over it.

  


A small woman with steel grey hair bowed to them. 

"These are your rooms, honored guests. Each of you has a separate set of rooms." She walked to the second door on the left, which had a silver circle painted over it. "These are your rooms, Herald Jovel. The next rooms are for Princess Lyra; notice the pink rose over the door. The middle rooms are for you and your family, my lady," she said, bowing to Elspeth. This door had a copper triangle over it. "The next rooms are for you, little lord," she said this bowing to Grith. "And this room is for you, winged one." She looked apprehensively at Rymeer. "There is only one very large room in this suite. If you do not find this sufficient, please tell us and we will move you." 

  


Rymeer studied the room. "I think this will be good," he said. The door to his room was larger than the others. It had a silver crescent over it. "How do I open the door?"

  


"The doors to these rooms will open, close, and lock to your commands. Only you, the mage who created the doors, and myself can open the doors. There are also locking doors that lead from each room to the next, and ones to lead to the balcony outside. Those also will only open at their resident's command."

  


Elspeth looked at Gwena and the other Companions, then at the woman. 

  


"What of the Companions?" Elspeth asked.

  


The woman started. She blinked at the Companions for a moment, then straightened her back. "They will be staying in the two rooms on the far sides." She pointed to the two rooms in question, one with a yellow sun over it, the other with a golden lightening bolt. "Those rooms will open to mind command, of which I am told your Companions are capable?" 

  


Gwena blinked at the woman. _:Yes. We are capable of Mindspeech.:_ The servant seemed surprised. She blinked, then said, "Very interesting. I should like to speak with you sometime, if that is possible, my lady?" 

  


Gwena nodded. _:I would be delighted. But not right now. I am very tired.:_

  


"Right," Elspeth said. "Thank you very much. If you don't mind terribly, we are very tired and would like to rest."

  


"Of course!" The servant said. "If you need anything at all, call for me and I will come. My name is Pae-kim. Just call my name if you need me, and I will come." With that she bowed and left. 

  


Windstar walked to the middle door. She made sure it was the one with the copper triangle, then opened the door. She walked into the room, not knowing what to expect.

  


She certainly wasn't expecting what she got. It seemed their suite only had four walls. The wall with the door, the two walls one either side separating the family from the others, and the back wall, that had long, thin windows with the wooden shutters thrown open, and a door leading to a deck outside. There were two couches in the front of the room, a shelf full of books and scrolls, and two beds in the back.

  


Darkwind looked around. "Don't believe much in privacy, do they?"

  


Elspeth frowned. "I guess not," she said. Windstar walked further into the room. She noticed strange grooves in the floor. Her brows furrowed. Her eyes followed the tracks to the wall, where she saw something poking out at about eye height. She tugged at it, and a folded screen of paper fell out of the wall, it's wooden frame sliding on the groove on the floor. She looked over at her parents.

  


"Here's our privacy," she said. "Look." She pulled the screen to the other wall, then said through the screen, "Now we have separate rooms!"

  


Elspeth pulled back on the screen from the other side. "Did you say something, honey?"

  


"Yes, I said: now we have separate rooms!"

  


Elspeth put her hand up to the screen and closed her eyes. "There's some kind of sound blocking spell on these," she said. Darkwind walked up behind her. "That's interesting. The people here seem to have their magic under better control than us. I would like to know how they got over the Storms so quickly."

  


"I would to. I bet we could learn a lot from these people."

  


"Hey, Mother, Father! Come look at this!" Windstar had opened the door that led outside. She waved to her parents. "Come on!"

  


Darkwind and Elspeth walked to the door. The door led to a balcony. The balcony was home to a small garden with small trees and many flowers. Windstar wasn't looking at the garden, however. She was standing at the edge of the balcony, looking down at the view. Their rooms were located at the edge of the waterfall. As they watched from the balcony, the river plunged from the cliff around them. Past the waterfall they could see the sea port, and past that the had a view of the open ocean. The mist from the waterfall sprayed them lightly, making everything look slightly other worldly.

  


"Oh, my," Elspeth breathed. Darkwind nodded.

  


*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  


"Masster, the girl and her family have reached Kai-ling."

  


The mage turned his head. "Have they? Good for them. I hope the girl falls off a boat and saves me the trouble of killing her. I do hate having blood on my robes."

  


Tathil watched his creator carefully. "Why do you wisssh her dead, Masster? That hasss never been clear to me."

  


The mage looked at his creation. "Do you know what my name used to be, Tathil?"

  


Tathil blinked. "No, Masster," he said.

  


"Fifty years ago, I was born into the K'Vala Vale. My name was Icestorm. For years I was considered the best mage in all the Vales. Whenever there was a problem, it would be brought to me. Then, something happened."

  


Tathil fixed his unblinking eyes on his master. "Yesss," he prompted.

  


"All of a sudden, nobody came to me anymore. I was second best, good for minor problems, but nothing more. I was abandoned for my little brat of a student. The arrogant upstart was powerful, certainly, but he never wanted the discipline that would have made him truly great. That brat took what was mine, and left me with what he did not want."

  


"Masster, what doess thiss have to do with the girl?"

  


The mage spun around and slammed Tathil into the stone wall. "I am tired of being replaced by upstarts!" The mage hissed in Tathil's face. "Windstar was to be my tool to finally kill that blasted student of mine, then I would control her and she would show the world what it meant to be afraid. She would have been my tool, and the world would have feared me for I would have controlled her every move."

  


"Master," Tathil choked. "Why then do you want her dead? You have stretched her abilities, she and Eclipse would make powerful tools. Why kill her?"

  


The mage dropped Tathil to the floor and turned away. "My gods cursed student interfered with the process. I can never be sure Windstar is completely under my control. I do not want an enemy I do not know."

  


He walked quickly around the room, Tathil watching him the way he would watch a rabid animal. "They stopped coming to me for their problems, Tathil. Then the Storms came, and everyone was confused. Nobody asked me for help, even though I have never been outdone in magical theory. No, they all went to my student, who nearly lost his mind to the Storms."

  


He looked around. "After the Storms, nobody knew what to do; not even said student. The idiot boy looked straight at the answer to the world's lack of magic, and he didn't recognize it for what it was. Or maybe he did, and was to afraid to acknowledge it's existence."

  


"Master?"

  


"The Void, you fool! The place where magic is born, the place where magic dies! Rules do not apply there, and many things that should not be possible can be done! How do you think you where created, Tathil? I went straight to the beginning and end of everything, and took enough raw magic to create life! So much potential, and nobody has noticed it! Nobody but me. I won't be second to anyone now, Tathil. All will bow before me, ask me for the answers to problems. And if there are no problems, Tathil," he hissed at the creature. "I will make them. Then everyone will know and fear me. Even my student."

  


Tathil was shaking. His master had a crazed look in his eyes. It was the same look he got when he hurt Eclipse, Tathil realized. Also the same look most people had during sex. 

  


_'He thrives on pain,'_ Tathil thought. _'Pain and fear. It is what makes him run. Please don't let him turn on me,'_ the winged serpent creature prayed. Then something occurred to him.

  


_'When the world is at his feet, I will be there with him! The people will bow to me as well! I will be feared.'_ Tathil smiled, as much a a serpent can smile. 

  


"Master," he asked. "What is the name of the student you hate so dearly?"

  


The mage turned to Tathil. His eyes were narrowed to slits; utter hatred boiled in those eyes. "His name," the mage whispered, "is Firesong."

  


  


  


  


  


  


  


A.N. I don't know if this chapter will stand the test of time. It could be that I will change it later on in the story. There was some plot development, some new characters, and we learned some knew stuff. I'm not sure I like this chapter; it gives a basic idea of the future plot, but I think the part about the mage and Tathil is a little vague. Please tell me what you think, I would love to know. Remember, I may change this chapter at a later date. I'm really sorry it took me so long to post. I went on a long vacation, and spent a long time reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Major sad angst going on in that book, people. I cried at the end. I kept crying the whole day. Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter. I tried really hard to have a point, and I think I just may have done it. Se you next chapter!

  


~Kestrel 

  



	7. Terms of Alliance

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


  


Westim ran his hands lovingly over the smooth wood before him. He had made many ships before, and yet he knew that this one was the best of them all. It was a long, sleek craft built of very dark, fine grained wood. It was nearly black, until the sun hit it, showing the red tones of the wood. Westim stood back and admired his ship. Like all Kailinese ships, it was built on lines and angles, with no rounded edges to cover it's beauty. It's main sail rose in a red crest like a lady's fan. When the sun hit Westim's ship, it shone through the sails and turned everything red as the sunset. He loved the ship; it was like his child.

"You're destined for the Empress, little one," he whispered to the wood. "She and her mages have great plans for you." He smiled. "But no ship may sail without a name. You shall be _Coi Serke._ Named for your red color, my love. You are the life blood.

  


  


~

  


Windstar woke up to the sound of birds singing outside her open window. She had had another one of her strange dreams. She was standing at the edge of some great void, with beautiful colors and lights streaming past her into darkness. She wondered what it meant. She had that dream almost every night, and had for as long as she could remember. She knew it meant something, but she didn't know what.

She sat up in bed, looking around her. The paper screens hid her bed and the space around it from view. She and her parents had found that there were closets and shelves built into the walls, hidden from view behind more paper screens. Why the Kailinese kept so much hidden from view was still a mystery to Windstar; she had vowed to find out more about these people before she left their care. 

  


Looking out the window, Windstar found that it was rather late in the morning. Her parents must have left her to sleep in, she supposed. _'That's good,'_ she thought. _'After last night's magic practice, I probably would have slept in even if they had tried to wake me.'_

  


True to their promise, Windstar's parents had started truly teaching her how to use her powers. She had already learned basic shielding; last night they had hammered her shields to make sure they would hold. They had, but Windstar had been thoroughly exhausted after the exercise. With no ley lines or nodes to replenish herself, she would be drained of magic for a day or so. 

  


Having no ley lines or nodes did not seem to bother the Kailinese, though. Windstar had heard her parents talking of the spells that were commonly used in Kai-ling that should not have been possible with magic scattered the way it was now. She had also been watching, and she had noticed something. The mages of Kai-ling always carried staves, or charms, or some artifact that did not seem to have an immediate use. When she looked at these artifacts with her Mage-Sight, they did not seem to exist at all. While every other thing Windstar could think of had some kind of magical aura, the mage artifacts had none, and she wanted to know why.

  


Climbing out of bed, she opened the cabinet that held her clothing. Choosing a pair of her beloved riding breeches she struggled into those. She then surveyed her tops. Anything would go well with her tan breeches, she thought, but her Valdemaran clothing was all long-sleeved, and it was terribly hot outside. She looked at her wardrobe. She did have one of the strange sleeveless vests the Kailinese wore. Royal blue with red and yellow embroidery all over it, it had been a present from Pae-kim. She pulled it on. _'If only Mirian could see me now. She'd yell at me for going out wearing so little.'_ Windstar laughed. If only Mirian knew that her father's people had public springs where they wore nothing at all!

  


She pulled back the screen separating her bed from the main room. She found some fruit, some bread, and a cold glass of milk waiting for her on the table.

  


_'That's strange,'_ she thought. _'How do they keep the milk cold? Yet another mystery.'_ Grabbing the milk and some fruit, she walked out the door to the gardens and balcony. She saw Mero resting near the edge, looking wistfully out to sea. Windstar crept silently up behind him.

  


"Boo!" She yelled. Mero started, his head swinging around to look at the youngster in front of him. 

  


_:Will you kindly not do that?: _He said. _:I was trying to think.:_

  


Windstar sat down next to him. "About what?"

  


Mero looked out to sea again. He sighed._ :I miss the open fields. It is lovely here, but I want to run.:_

  


Windstar eyed him over the orange she was eating. She held out a section of the fruit to him. "Orange?"

  


Mero looked at the fruit in her hand for a moment before taking it from her and eating it. Then he looked to the sea again. Windstar put down her fruit and put a hand on his neck. "I wish I could miss Valdemar like you do, Mero." She whispered. Mero turned back to her. 

  


_ :Do you not miss your home, Windstar? You are braver than I, then.:_

  


She shook her head. "I'm not brave. I just don't miss it." Windstar paused, her eyes now fixed on the sea. "It's never been home to me, Mero. I don't fully belong to Valdemar."

  


The Companion examined the girl before him. _:Where then is your home, child?:_ He asked. Windstar shook her head. "I don't know, Mero. Maybe I don't have a home. Maybe I don't belong anywhere."

  


Mero nudged her with his nose. _:That may be, Windstar. Perhaps you will never belong anywhere. But I am sure you will belong with someone or something.:_

  


Windstar nodded, her eyes still fixed on the distant shore. She pulled her eyes away by sheer force of will. "You say you miss the fields, Mero. There's a great big field not far from here. Captain Neroshi showed it to me. Do you want me to take you there?"

  


Mero stood up. _:That would be wonderful, Windstar. Will you stay with me? We can run together, if you want.:_

  


"Of course I'll stay with you, you silly horse." She said, lightly smacking his head. "Just let me get my spurs...."

  


_:Oh no you don't, little fiend. Horse my tail. Let's go, I can't properly tackle you here.:_

  


  


~

  


Lyra sighed. She wanted nothing more than to put her head down on the table and sleep. Instead she listened to more droning from the Kailinese some officer or another. She thought she had never heard a more boring voice in her life. Just as she was about to forget courtesy and put her head down, the door opened. The officer mercifully stopped droning as he looked to see who was walking in the door. 

  


A white haired wrinkled little man had just walked in the door. The officer of something or another looked vaguely startled before he inclined his head to the newcomer. "Master Lystai, welc-"

  


"You may go, Gynir. I thank you for your time here."

  


The officer, who Lyra now remembered was a sailor captain of some sort, looked very relieved. He got up hastily and bowed his way out the door. The old man who had replaced him walked to the chair Gynir had just vacated and carefully sat down. He looked at the three foreigners. "Please forgive Gynir," he said. "He is quite the enthusiastic sailor, and he knows his field well, but he was not the best choice for a diplomat. I hope he has not bored you enough to drive you away?"

  


Lyra was surprised. In her time in Kai-ling, only Captain Neroshi had been so direct. The rest of the Kailinese seemed to believe showing what they thought of matters would cause some sort of terrible damage. 

  


"You are no doubt surprised by my direct approach. Please do not be offended, I simply see no point in wasting time with verbal fencing." Again, the old man was very direct. 

  


"We are not offended at all, sir. We have grown rather tired of verbal fencing ourselves. May I ask who you are?" This was Elspeth, who seemed to have pulled herself out of the stupor induced by Gynir. The old man grinned.

  


"A direct one, you are. That is good. I am Master Lystai. I'm sure that means nothing to you. I am the Empress' closest advisor and chief of her mages. I am truly sorry I have not met you yet, but we needed to make sure you wouldn't try to kill us or anything likewise unpleasant."

  


Elspeth and Darkwind exchanged a look. Lyra suspected they were silently debating what to do next. They turned away from each other to face Lystai. Elspeth spoke first. 

  


"Many others would be offended by such a statement as that, Master Lystai, but as we have seen our share of backstabbing, I think we can understand. Are we to assume we are trusted, then?"

  


Lystai smiled again. "While generally I do not encourage assuming anything, yes, you may assume you are trusted. Now, if we can get on with serious talk of alliance?"

  


Darkwind nodded. "That would be nice."

  


"I am sure you are wondering what good an alliance with us would do. As we live many, many leagues from your homeland, we would not do you much good, yes?" Lystai looked at them. "It takes roughly a month to travel from your lands to ours, correct?"

  


Elspeth nodded. "It took us a month, and we were riding Companions, who are faster than any horses. I had wondered why you would seek an alliance with us. I do not believe we have much to give you."

  


Lystai looked at Elspeth. "Nor do you see much of value that we can give you. Come out and say it, child: you think an alliance with us would be a waste of good paper."

  


Darkwind spoke up this time. "Not a waste, surely. Just, not useful in any ways now apparent."

  


Lystai smiled. "No, not in any apparent way, I suppose." He looked around the room. "I hear your people are having difficulties recovering from what you call the 'Mage Storms.' I think we might be able to help you with that. We have always had a slightly different way of working magic."

  


Elspeth leaned forward in her seat. "Different how? We have noticed that you have spells up and working everywhere we have seen. How, when there is no ready supply of magic from nodes?"

  


"The nodes were not the only sources of magic, child. They were only the most apparent."

  


Darkwind's eyes narrowed. "Not blood-"

  


"We are not bloodmages, hawk child. We would not sacrifice our people for something we could live without."

  


"What then, Master Lystai? What is the secret?"

  


Lystai looked at Darkwind. "Two of your people hold the answer to that question, bird man. One is afraid of what it means, and the other seeks to use it to destroy the rest of us." The old man's eyes turned to look out the window to the sea. All of the rooms in the palace had windows looking to the sea or the river. "Magic is born in chaos, and it dies in darkness, only to be born again. The nodes where but reflections of true power, magic flowing into darkness to meet it's rebirth." The old mage turned his eyes back to Darkwind and Elspeth. "Your people call the darkness the Void. It is where you sent the magic of the Storms. Into darkness it goes, then into chaos, and finally it comes back to us, spread out across our world." 

  


He took a pendant out of the front of his robes. It was a steel dragon, with a diamond eye. "Some things attract magic, meaning that when magic flows back into our world, it is more likely to go certain places. My people have learned to make it flow where we want it. We could teach you that." The pendant flashed in the light. Lystai handed the pendant to Darkwind, who took it cautiously.

  


He looked at it carefully, turning it every which way. He could not see anything special about it; it didn't even have a magical aura. He blinked. The thing seemed to be surrounded by emptiness. 

  


_:What is it, Darkwind?:_ Elspeth whispered into his mind. _:I've never seen anything like it.:_

  


_ :Neither have I, bright feather,:_ he mindspoke back. _:It is as though magic does not exist around it.:_

  


He looked more carefully at the pendant. He was startled suddenly when Lystai said:

  


"Don't look at it for the answer. Look around it."

  


Darkwind did as he was told. He looked carefully around the pendant, trying to notice anything out of the ordinary. 

  


_:It's collecting energy from around it, love.: _Elspeth said. _:Any magic that isn't currently being used is being drawn to it. But it only takes the magic excreted by other things.:_

  


Darkwind looked at his lover. Was she mad? Then he looked more carefully at the pendant and it's surroundings. Sure enough, it was collecting the free magic floating around, the way a funnel would collect raindrops. But it wasn't holding the magic, just collecting it. Darkwind looked carefully at Lystai. Then he realized: the magic that was collected by the pendant was draining into Lystai. It was as though Lystai himself was a small node. 

  


Darkwind could have smacked himself. How could he not have noticed this before? He had seen other mages here before, and they had all glowed with an energy too great to be their own. He felt very stupid.

  


Elspeth seemed to know how he felt. _:Don't feel stupid, love. They glowed the same way all mages used to glow before the Storms, when we were all feeding off the nodes and ley lines.:_

  


Darkwind nodded. It had seemed so normal to have mages glow with power. 

  


Lystai smiled. "Do you understand now?" He asked. Darkwind and Elspeth nodded. "You were blinded from seeing it before because it defies all you know from before the Storms. We often refuse to acknowledge things that are different from what we know. The two of you and myself were trained in the old ways of magic, so this new way of collecting power seems impossible to us. It is much easier for younger mages to grasp. I think your daughter already begins to suspect that our mages carry magic collectors around with them."

  


Elspeth looked at him. "What makes you think that?"

  


Lystai smiled. "Currently, one of my mages is telling me she has been cornered by a little girl with white hair who is asking her why her staff has no magic around it. Do you know of any other little girl with white hair?"

  


  


~

  


"Everything has an aura! Why doesn't you staff? It has absolutely nothing around it! It's almost as though it's sucking magic away from it's surroundings......" As Windstar talked, she realized that that was exactly what the staff was doing. She looked at it carefully. It was collecting magic from around it and draining it.... Somewhere. _'Into the mage!'_ She thought.

  


She looked into the older woman's eyes. "How does it work, lady?" Windstar asked as respectfully as she could.

  


The woman smiled. "Hold out your hand, child." Windstar did as she was told. The mage placed her staff into Windstar's hands. Windstar felt some of the magic draining into her instead. She felt warm inside, all warm and fuzzy, but not quite right. 

  


"Close your eyes, and focus on the staff." 

  


Windstar did as she was told. She focused all of her attention of the smooth wood before her. She felt her mind slipping into the wood. She relaxed completely, and then suddenly, she was in the place of her dreams. She was looking into a great void of nothingness, so empty that it sucked everything else to it. She felt power ripping past her, power from all things, alive, not alive, good, evil, everything, and it all whipped past her into the Void. It did not matter what the energy was or from where it came; it all went to the same place. She observed the energy streaming past her, then she realized that not all of it was going straight to the darkness. Some of it was being pulled back into her world to be used by her people before zooming into the darkness. Windstar pulled her awareness back slightly, looking at the staff. It seemed the mage had connected the staff directly to the stream, allowing some of the energy to pool there where she could use it before it went on it's inevitable plunge into darkness.

  


Windstar was awed. She pulled her mind from the staff and looked at the woman before her. "Teach me," she whispered.

  


~

  


There was a knock on the door. Master Lystai smiled at Darkwind, Elspeth, and Lyra and got up to open the door. A woman with tan skin and steel gray hair walked in holding a staff in front of her. Windstar slipped in behind her, looking awed and intimidated. 

The woman bowed to Lystai and said, "Greetings, Master Lystai."

  


Lystai bowed back, saying "Master Moonistri, it is good to see you again. I trust your travels have not tired you overmuch?"

  


The woman smiled slightly. "Lystai, I am still perfectly capable of traveling, thank you. I would like you to meet this young woman." Moonistri placed a hand on Windstar's shoulder drawing her forward. "This bright little one got me in a corner and wouldn't leave until I explained my staff. Then she came right out and asked me to teach her."

  


Elspeth opened her mouth to apologize for her daughter's behavior, but the lady mage seemed to know what she was going to say. "Don't apologize, Lady Mage. I believe curious is the natural state for children, and I encourage curiosity in adults."

  


Lystai looked at Windstar, who still looked like she had been hit in the back of the head with a board. "Why don't you sit down, child? There are plenty of seats." Windstar twitched at being addressed, turning her wide eyes to Lystai. Noticing the pendant on his chest, her eyes grew even wider. She allowed her father to steer her to a seat in between him and her mother, where she sat down. 

  


"There is no need to look so startled, my dear child." Lystai said. "It is only me, after all. Just a mad old man with eccentric ideas." The skin around his eyes crinkled with mirth.

  


Windstar blinked and shook her head. "You're not crazy, sir! You're a genius! I can tell by the pendant you wear."

  


Lystai sat in a seat across from Windstar and her parents. "I have two things to say to that, child of the North. First, never judge somebody by outward experiences. Second, the line between genius and insanity is a very thin one indeed. While many say I am a genius, many more say I am a mad old man. It is just a matter of perspective."

  


The old man leaned back in his seat, surveying the family before him. He turned his eyes back to Windstar. "You say you would like to learn our magic tricks, do you, Windstar? Yes, I do know your name, the Empress told me." He looked at Darkwind and Elspeth. "How do your parents feel about that?"

  


Darkwind looked at Elspeth, motioning for her to talk. "We would like to learn what you have to teach ourselves, Master Lystai. I have never seen anything like what you are doing."

  


Lystai closed his eyes, smiling. "And I would love to teach. So you see, there is something useful we can do for your peoples."

  


Darkwind spoke now. "Indeed there is. I fear there is nothing of sufficient worth we can do for you in return. This exchange may turn out to be fairly one sided."

  


"Oh, but there is something you can do for us, Master Darkwind," Moonistri said, speaking up for the first time since her entrance. She pushed herself away from the window where she had been standing. "You may have noticed that there are very few wooden artifacts in Kai-ling. All of the wood we are willing to take goes to our ships. Also, we have very little space for growing things. We fear that within a generation, the food output of our country will not be enough to feed our people. We could not help but notice that your peoples and those with whom you are allied have space aplenty for growing food. We would be very willing to trade our knowledge and for the natural resources we do not have."

  


Darkwind opened his mouth to say something, but Lyra beat him to it. 

  


"If you don't mind my saying, it is very difficult for us to get to your land, and you to ours. I don't know how possible it would be to bring things from our country to yours."

  


Lystai stood up at this. "What you say is quite right, young one. It is very difficult to get from our land to yours. So now it is time for a little trip, to show you how my people plan to overcome this difficulty." 

  


He walked to the door and opened it. "If you will please follow me?"

  


~

  


Westim looked the last time at his ship. She was held up by a complex wooden structure. She had been built further inland than was normal, but he knew that it did not matter how far inland she was. She would still sail. She was to be the first of the Empress' new fleet. The mages had been experimenting with retired navy ships before, and they had worked as well as hoped. Now was the time for the mages to try their tricks on a ship built especially for them. 

  


"She is beautiful, Shipmaster," a soft voice said behind him. Westim whipped around and gasped, falling to his knees in a kneel. "Your Majesty," he whispered, looking at the ground. "I am honored by your exalted presence. I have done nothing to deserve-"

  


"Hush, Shipmaster Westim. There is no reason to be intimidated by me. Look at me, Westim." 

  


"Your Majesty, it would be disrespectful." Westim felt fingers lifting up his chin. He kept his eyes down. "Look up, Westim. I cannot have a Shipmaster who will not look me in the eye."

  


Westim looked up into the eyes before him. The Empress Shikomi stood before him, wearing none of her usual makeup. She was in a plain red kimono with her hair pulled into a lose bun at the base of her neck. She released Westim's chin, sure now that he would look at her. She gave him a small smile. 

  


"Tell me, Shipmaster Westim, have you named this beauty yet?" 

  


"I thought we could call her _Coi Serke,_ Empress. For her color."

  


The Empress nodded. "Life Blood. That is quite appropriate, Westim. For her color and her function. She will be the first to make connections with other lands." The Empress turned. "Ah, here comes Lystai. Here is where our alliance with the Northerners will be born or killed. I hope Lystai knows what he is doing."

  


Lystai walked up to the Empress and bowed before her. "Empress, I have brought the Ambassadors."

  


Empress Shikomi inclined her head to the foreigners. She wondered why the girl was with them, then she thought that Lystai must have his reasons. 

  


"Greetings, honored guests. I am glad you are here. What you are about to see will make all the difference in our geographical separation. Long have we looked for a faster way to traverse the distances between lands. We now believe we have found it. I would like you to see the _ Coi Serke_, the first in a new kind of ship. If you will please board with me, you can be with us for this great turning point in our history."

  


Feeling slightly confused, the Valdemarans followed the Empress, the shipmaster, and Lystai onto the ship. 

  


_:Are they sane, Elspeth? This ship is sitting in the middle of a field. What exactly are they trying to do?:_ Lyra asked. She felt very out of it. First all the talk of magic, and now she was boarding a ship beached a mile from the sea. She wanted to go drink some tea.

  


_:I don't know what is happening, Lyra. I am sure we will understand soon enough.: _Elspeth answered. She didn't know what was going on any better than her half-sister, but she held her head high anyways. Her confused thoughts were interrupted by her daughter's mind voice. 

  


_:Mama, there are magic absorber things all over this ship. They all lead to that big one, next to the ship wheel.:_

  


Sure enough, if Elspeth looked carefully, she could she the magic concentrated in the large crystal held on a pedestal in the middle of the deck. It was connected to other smaller crystals all over the ship; Elspeth could see crystals at each end of the ship, as well as on the mast. She walked over to the sails, and she could see that there were tiny crystals sewn to the sail as well.

  


Elspeth was really starting to wonder what was going on. Just as she was opening her mouth to ask a question, Lystai started talking. 

  


"I'm sure you have noticed the magic gatherers all over this ship," he said. "They are what will lift this ship off the ground and let her fly."

  


Elspeth blinked. "Excuse me, did you say fly?"

  


Lystai smiled. "Yes, I did say fly. It needs only my activation spell, then it will be able to fly. That, and a captain to steer her. Good afternoon, Captain Neroshi." He said this as the Captain jumped onto the deck grinning widely. "Is she ready, Master Lystai?" He asked. 

  


"She is. Are you?"

"Always."

  


Lystai looked at Elspeth. "If you would prefer to watch from the ground, we would understand. I assure you, though, it is perfectly safe here."

  


"We will be fine here," Darkwind said. "If it is safe enough for your Empress, than it is certainly safe enough for us."

  


The Empress laughed. "You have good logic, Master Darkwind. I would not be here if the idea was to kill you!"

  


The ship shuddered slightly. Lystai had put his hands on the largest crystal and was pulling all the magic out of it. Windstar realized this was how things were connected to the great energy flow towards the Void. The ship hummed as magic flowed from the great stream to replace what Lystai took.

  


"She's all yours, Captain." Lystai said, stepping away from the crystal. Neroshi stepped up to the wheel. He turned it slightly, and the ship moved to the left. "How do I make her go up?" He asked. "You pull the lever next to the wheel back towards you," Lystai answered. Neroshi pulled the lever back slightly and Windstar felt the ship rise up underneath her. She rushed to the railings to look over, and gasped to find the ground nearly thirty feet below. The sails of the ship caught the wind and the ship moved forward. Neroshi laughed; he seemed to be thrilled. "Where shall I take her, Your Majesty?" He asked. 

  


"Why don't we take a look at the Palace and city from above, Captain. I should very much like to see the bird's view of my people."

  


As the ship turned out over the city, Windstar felt wonderful. She was far off the ground, above all the troubles of the world. She never wanted to come down.

  


~ 


	8. Decisions

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  


  


"Clear your mind. You'll never get anywhere with all those thoughts floating around in your head. You have to relax if you want this type of magic to work for you."

  


Eclipse did as he was told. He had no choice, really. His options were listen or be beaten. He found listening preferable. He cleared his mind of all thoughts, emptying his brain and energy reserves until there was nothing left and he felt like sleeping. There was nothing left; if he was drained anymore he would die. He then thought about the Void, and the power held there. He sent out a tendril of thought to the rush of energy, and sighed slightly as the energy rushed to fill the empty space within himself.

  


He opened his eyes, feeling far more powerful than he had moments ago. 

  


"Very good, Eclipse. Now, your shields."

  


Eclipse allowed his newly acquired power to flow out of him to pool around him. He could see the energy fields around him, set to allow him to absorb any energy thrown at him. His shields always looked orange to him, though he knew that no one else would ever be close enough to see their color. He thought that a shame. They were very beautiful.

  


A surge of power came at him from his teacher's direction. Eclipse allowed his shields to absorb the blow, then he used the energy from the attack to fling a sheet of fire towards his teacher. Then he twirled his fingers, spinning his teacher around like a top. The older mage flung out his hands to stop his rotation, then flung a sheet of ice at Eclipse. Eclipse felt a second skin of frozen water form on him, and suddenly he couldn't move. He focused for a moment, and the ice skin shattered all around him for his efforts. He flung one hand out in front of him, fling the mage into the far wall. He flung the other hand out, and magical ropes flew to tie up the older man. Eclipse allowed him to fall to the floor, then walked over to him and looked down on him. 

  


"Do you surrender?" He asked. His teacher nodded. He released the bonds and bent to help his teacher up. "Thank you, Eclipse," the man said. "You are so good, young one. I believe you have learned all that I can teach you."

  


Eclipse smile at the man. His teacher had short white hair and a tan, wrinkled face. He had been teaching Eclipse for about a year now, and Eclipse had grown to love him like the father he did not believe he had. He shook his head. 

  


"I don't think so, Moonsky. I think there's still quite a lot I can learn from you."

  


The old man grinned at the boy. "You are so polite, Eclipse. Truly, I will soon become useless to you. I really don't know why your father allows me to stay and teach you."

  


"Do you know, neither do I. You are rather useless."

Eclipse saw his teacher's eyes widen. Moonsky's knees gave out and he fell to the floor, and Eclipse could see his father standing behind the old man. Moonsky fixed his eyes on Eclipse and whispered something, then his eyes slipped closed and he fell forward. Eclipse saw then the dagger buried in his teacher's back. He stared in horror at the mage, then looked at his father. His mouth moved, and tears spilled down his face, but no words would come. 

  


His father scowled at him. "Out with it, boy. What do you feel you need to say?"

  


Eclipse gaped. He croaked, trying to say something, then tried again. "Why?"

  


The mage stepped closer to Eclipse and grabbed his collar. "Because I had no more use for him. Do you have a problem with that?"

  


Eclipse cowered before his father. He wanted so much to scream at his father, scream at him and kick him and throw things. He would, too, if it weren't for his mother and little sister, who he knew would suffer greatly if he acted out. He knew he would be severely punished as well, but he didn't care as much about that as he did about the rest of his family. He knew what he had to say to keep his mother and sister safe. 

  


He hung his head, his face burning with shame. "No, sir. There is no problem." His father let go of his collar and stepped away. "That is good. Now, get a servant to deal with this mess," he said, waving his hand at Eclipse's fallen teacher.

  


"Yes, father," he said, casting one last look at his beloved teacher as he trudged away. In the chaos of his mind, he realized he didn't know what his teacher's last words had been.

  


Icestorm scowled down at the body of the teacher after Eclipse left. "It's a good thing you're gone now, old friend. I wouldn't want Eclipse to get any sentimental ideas from you. Funny, your last words. "I loved you like a son, Eclipse." Can't have you taking my place, now can I, Moonsky?"

  


The mage threw back his head and laughed, and the servants Eclipse had sent cowered outside in the hall, fearing the near-mad laughter.

  


  


  


*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  


  


"Empty your mind. This form of magic will not be possible for you if you have many thoughts bouncing around your skull."

  


Windstar's brow furrowed as she tried to do what she was told. She concentrated very hard on clearing her mind. She started when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

  


Master Lystai smiled down at her. "Child," he said. "If you think any harder about not thinking, I fear your head will explode. Relax. Imagine all of your thoughts and energy flowing out of you into the ground beneath you. When there is nothing left, reach for the Void."

  


Windstar nodded and she closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, and as she let it out she imagined everything that was her streaming out of her into the ground. She felt her muscles relax as everything streamed out of her. When she thought there was nothing left, she stretched her mind towards the great river of energy. She reached out tentatively, and felt the energy flowing into her. She inhaled, feeling whole as she had never felt before. She let more energy flow into her, until she was sure she could hold no more. She pulled her mind back into herself. She opened her eyes and looked down at her hand. 

  


She gasped. "Master Lystai! I'm glowing!"

  


The old mage smiled. "Only to people who can See magic, Windstar. Now, see if you can build better shields now that you have more power."

  


Windstar frowned. She pushed some of the energy out from herself, forming a shell around herself. She thought she was doing very well, until she felt a surge of magic from Lystai, and watched as it punched a hole in her shield, causing it to collapse.

  


She scowled at the old man, intending to tell him off, but Lystai beat her to it. "Windstar, if you try to build a stiff wall, all I have to do is knock it down. See if you can make something that will absorb my attack."

Windstar frowned. She didn't know if she could do that. It sounded complicated. She thought about things that would absorb things. _A sponge?_she thought.She saw an image of herself standing behind a giant sponge with Lystai throwing lightning bolts at her. She tried hard not to laugh. _No, not a sponge. A funnel, maybe?_ She thought that sounded like a good idea. She rebuilt her shield, this time with curves that would direct any energy thrown at her to where she could control it. She nodded to Master Lystai, who threw another wall of energy at her. Her shields directed the energy right back to her, giving her more power for whatever she wanted to do with it. 

  


"Good!" Lystai told her. "Now, see if you can use the energy I throw at you to make your shields more powerful."

  


Windstar closed her eyes. She had a feeling she was going to be very tired by the end of the day. She looked across the room to her parents, who were being taught by Master Moonistri. They looked like they would be almost as worn out as she. She looked at what they were doing. It looked like they were doing shielding, like her, only much more complicated. She focused on them, trying to see what they were doing. She felt the shields around her shift and slide out of her grasp. She turned her attention back to her shields, just in time for them to crumble as Lystai threw another bolt at her.

  


"Why did you do that?" Windstar demanded, frowning. "I was trying to figure out what my parents are doing!"

  


Lystai looked at her. "What your parents are doing is the concern of your parents, for now. Your concern is learning how to control your magic, so well that it becomes a part of you. Then your shields won't fall apart when you aren't concentrating on them."

  


Windstar frowned again. "Why is it so important that I learn how to control my magic? Maybe I don't want to be a mage after all. That's just what people expect-"

  


_:Enough.:_ Windstar jumped. Lystai was poking around in her head! She tried to force him out, but he wouldn't go. 

  


_:Why won't you leave me alone?I never asked for any of this!:_

  


_:You asked me to teach you, did you not?:_

  


_ :I didn't think it would be so hard!: _Windstar tried to get away from Lystai. _:Just leave me alone!:_

  


_:Leave you alone? So you can do this?:_ Windstar felt her mind floating away from her, into one of Lystai's memories. 

  


  


~

  


_She was surrounded by them. Little boys and girls with Kailinese features taunting her, laughing at her. They pulled her hair and threw her books and scrolls into the mud. She yelled, knowing her family could not afford to replace those books. She got so mad; she knew her father would be furious when he found the books destroyed. She felt heat flowing in her veins, felt her blood boiling with anger. "Bookworm," they called her. "Weakling." She would show them. She raised her small fists and punched at the boy in front of her. _

_ Suddenly, the heat that had been rushing in her blood rushed out of her into the boy and several of the children around her. They screamed and glowed with the heat, falling to the ground as white fire burned them. She didn't know what was happening, she didn't understand. _

_ "Stop!" She screamed. "Stop!"_

  


~

  


Windstar was free of the terrible memory almost as soon as it had begun. It had felt like eternity to her. She turned wide eyes to Lystai. "What was that?" She asked.

  


Lystai met her eyes squarely. "That was me. You have felt my first dealing with magic."

  


Windstar stared. "What happened to them?" She whispered.

  


Lystai stared into her eyes.

  


_She was in a field with many other people. There were five mounds of flowers lying on a raised stone dais. The people around her were all wearing black. Black veils, black robes, black dresses. She saw a man near the dais raise his hands, heard him call out:_

_ "May your spirits fly free as the wind. May you find peace, and may we see you again someday, in the place where no shadows may fall."_

_ The mounds of flowers on the dais caught fire at that moment, the flames roaring up into the sky. She heard weeping all around her, saw the black swirling all around her._

  


She snapped back into her mind again. Lystai was still staring into her eyes. She looked at him very closely. "You killed them."

  


He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. "I did. Nikolo Sperin, Hashi Kim, Jani Kim, Umiki Tolondae and Shei Undolo. I killed them all before they had a chance to truly live."

  


Windstar blinked. "You still remember their names..."

  


"I do. To forget them would be an atrocity beyond words." He looked away, staring out the window for a minute before turning back to Windstar. "We must always remember the bad things we do, Windstar. We have to remember that we are capable of great destruction as well as great good. As mages, it is our duty to help people. If we lose sight of that, then we become monsters."

  


Windstar blinked. "I don't think I could ever do anything like that, Master Lystai."

  


Lystai whirled to face her again. "Oh no? You don't think you are capable of hurting people? What of this?"

  


_She was pinned to the wall again, by the noble boys. "What color is your blood?" They asked. She saw the knife closing in on her again, felt the power within her swelling. Just before she blacked out, she felt it all rush out of her._

  


"Hear me, Windstar. Had the tides been but a little different, you would have killed those boys." Lystai leaned in close to her face. "You would have been a murderer, Windstar. No amount of power, no bloodline can change that for you. Could you really have dealt with blood on your hands?"

  


Windstar's eyes were huge. Her head shook slightly, her mouth hanging open. 

  


"Before you write this off as the ranting of an old man, think for a moment. I do not believe you really understand what you risk if you do not learn to control your magic. It is not simply a 'you should learn,' it is a 'you must learn.' If you do not learn to control yourself, then not only do you risk your own life, you risk harming those around you. Are you willing to risk others lives?"

  


Windstar shook her head slightly, her mouth still open. "Is it really that important?"

  


Lystai gripped her shoulders. He knelt down in front of her. "Windstar, if you do not learn discipline, you will do something terrible. I can't say when or where, but I can promise you this. If you do not get the proper training, someday, you will lose control. Your magic will flow out of you, and you will have no way of controlling it."

  


Windstar's eyes slid out of focus. "No," she whispered. "It won't happen that way. Not for me...."

The air around her started to glow. The ground shook slightly. Lystai scowled. "Control yourself, child!"

  


Windstar continued shaking her head. The floor under her feet started to crack. Lystai shook her. "Stop it now, Windstar! I know you can, I know you have it in you. Don't make me do it for you!"

  


Elspeth and Darkwind saw what was going on as well as felt it. They looked over to see their daughter losing her control. 

  


"Windstar!" Elspeth yelled. She started to move towards her daughter. "Windstar, let me-" 

  


Darkwind held her back. "No, Elspeth. Let Lystai deal with Windstar. He is her teacher now; we must let him do as he sees fit." Elspeth nodded. She watched as her daughter continued to glow, the power around her building up.

  


Windstar was crying now. Her body shook, the light around her pulsed with each sob. The floor cracked a bit more.

  


"Windstar," Lystai said warningly. 

  


"I don't want to hear what you have to say!" Windstar screamed. "I don't want to be our puppet!"

  


"You must learn control, or you will destroy all that you love! Stop it, Windstar!" Lystai said.

  


"You don't understand!" Windstar wailed. "I don't want to be a mage! I don't want any of it!" The magic around her pulsed harder, slamming into the mage shields around the room. She sobbed. "I don't want any of it! I never asked for it, why does it have to be me?"

  


The room began to shake. "Why? I don't want it! I don't want any of it!" Windstar was incoherent now, shaking with sobs. A wind picked up in the room, blowing over books and desks. "I don't want it! Damn them! I don't want any of it! Why can't you all just leave me alone?"

  


Windstar was making a wreck of the room now. Papers were strewn everywhere, the desk was overturned, the floor was cracked.

  


"Are you quite finished?" Lystai asked.

  


Windstar turned on him. Her eyes glowed slightly, her power honed in on the older mage. "How dare you? How dare you ask if I'm done yet? How-" A sharp noise echoed through the room. Lystai had slapped her. She spluttered. Then her face contorted with fury. She threw her hands out, slamming Lystai into the wall. "How dare you? Do you think you can hit me? I'm a princess, dammit! You can't do that!"

  


Lystai pulled himself from the wall. "I can and I did. If it's what you need to snap out of your hysterics, so be it."

  


Windstar was shaking even harder now. "How dare you. How could you? I'll show you!" She threw out her hands again. "You have no right!" 

Lystai walked to her and grabbed her hands. "Would you kill me for it, Windstar? Is that what you were going to do?"

  


Windstar stared at his hands. "No! Let me go!"

  


Lystai shook her. "Look at what you have done, Windstar." He pushed her in front of him, showing her the destruction of the room. "What were you trying to do?"

  


Windstar gaped. Her eyes were wide as saucers as she took in the damage she had caused. She shook her head. "I didn't want ot hurt anybody." She whispered. "I was just mad, that's all." She kept shaking her head. "I didn't want to hurt anyone.."

  


Lystai bent ot face her. "Had you been anywhere else, you would have done much more damage. The protections are strong here."

  


Windstar shook her head. She looked up at Lystai. Her eyes begged for understanding. "I never wanted to hurt anyone."

  


Lystai looked back at her. "For someone who didn't want to hurt anyone, you certainly caused a lot of damage."

  


Windstar looked around her. She looked into her parents eyes; she saw no mercy there. She turned back to Lystai.

  


"It is most certainly time for you to learn discipline, Windstar. We will start by cleaning up this room."

  


Windstar nodded silently.

  


  


~*~*~*~*~*~

  


"What are we doing here, Master Lystai?"

  


Windstar and Lystai were outside, in one of the many Imperial gardens on the palace grounds. Lystai was holding a bag full of something, and Windstar ws feeling very confused.

So far, Lystai had been allowing her to do only the very basics of magic; even though she had known how do many of the things he taught for years. He also took her to do pointless things. For the last week, she had been working with the new horses for the noble people of Kai-ling. Lystai also made her help plant the gardens on the palace grounds, and take care of the plants that were in the glass houses near the palace wing. 

  


Now she was out in the gardens, waiting for Lystai's next lesson. Lystai smiled at her, and held up the bad of mysterious substance. "I am teaching you life skills, my child."

  


Windstar looked at the bag, then back at Lystai. She raised one eyebrow. "Do you keep life skills in that bag, Lystai?"

  


The old man laughed. "No, silly bird. I am going to teach you patience."

  


Windstar looked at the bag again. "Alright. You have me. How are you going to teach me patience using whatever is in that bag?"

  


"Sit down, and I'll show you." Windstar sat down on the gravel path of the garden, and Lystai did the same. "Now, give me your hands," Lystai said. She held out her hands, and Lystai took the bag and emptied seeds into her hands. He then took some for himself, and held them in his cupped palms. 

Windstar looked down at the seeds in her hands. Then she looked at the old mage, who was sitting with his eyes closed, hands with the seeds on his knees. She looked around her, trying to figure out what was going on. 

  


"Master Lystai? What are we doing?"

  


He opened one eye to look at her. "We are learning patience. Hold still and wait for a moment, and you'll understand."

  


She sighed and stilled herself. She imitated his position, crossing her legs and placing her hands one her knees. She then waited, as Lystai had told her to do. 

  


A little later, Windstar was starting to get irritated. It was quite clear to her nothing was happening; the seeds weren't growing into sprouts, Lystai wasn't turning a strange color. All and all, Windstar thought the whole exercise was rather pointless. She was about to tell Lystai what she thought of his lesson, when she noticed there were birds eating the seeds from Lystai's hands. 

They were beautiful birds. They had beautiful red wings, and blue bodies, with little black beaks. Windstar had always liked birds. She remembered the finches from her homeland, and how they used to sit outside her window. She wanted these little foreign birds to come closer so she could get a closer look at them. 

  


She held her body as still and rigid as she could, thinking that maybe if she held still enough, the birds would come eat from her hand too. She stayed like that until the birds ate all the seeds from Lystai's hands, but still they wouldn't come to her. 

  


After a while, Lystai stood up. Windstar looked up at him. "Why won't the birds come to me, Lystai?" She asked. "I tried to hold as still as I could."

  


The mage smiled down at her. "It's not holding still that matters, Windstar. The birds will only come to you when they feel safe around you."

  


Her brow furrowed. "I don't understand." 

  


Lystai bowed his head. "I know. But you will." He walked back towards the palace. "Come with me. It is time for you to learn more magic. Once you learn patience, we can get to the real magic, but until then, I might as well teach you parlor tricks."

  


  


~*~*~*~*~*~

  


Windstar's lessons continued in this vein for some time. Lystai would give her something to do to help her learn patience, like work in the garden, or train the horses. Then he would do some magic with her. Soon, though, it came time for the Valdemarans to leave Kai-ling. Windstar wasn't anywhere near done with her training, and her parents knew it. 

  


They decided to meet with Lystai, who had become a friend to them, and ask him what they should do.

  


~*~

  


"We need your advice, Lystai," Darkwind said. "Windstar has not learned all she needs to from you, yet it is time for us to return to Valdemar."

  


Lystai frowned. "I see your concerns. Yet, you and Elspeth are mages, can you not teach Windstar as well as I?"

  


Elspeth scowled slightly. "We're her parents. We love her like nothing else on this earth. She knows this, and she understands that we could never stay mad at her, because she is our daughter. She needs somebody who will be impartial with her. In short, somebody not us."

  


Lystai smiled. "Yes. That is the one failing with parents teaching their children. Sometimes, they find it impossible to be as tough on their children as they would be on other students. So, what do you suggest we do? Windstar must be trained, there is no question there."

  


Darkwind looked at Lystai. "We were hoping there was some way you could keep teaching her. We think you're exactly what she needs."

  


The older mage nodded. "I have been a teacher for fifty years, Darkwind. There is much I can do for your daughter. You must understand, however, my primary concern must always be Kai-ling. I cannot just leave."

  


Elspeth nodded. "I wish we did not live so far from here. It is nearly a month's to Valdemar."

  


"If I may make a suggestion.." Empress Shikomi walked through the open door. "Elspeth, Darkwind, you wish for Lystai to train your daughter in the ways of magic. Yet Lystai may not leave the islands. I think the thing you are forgetting is this: we now have ships that can make the trip from our land to yours in three or four days. It is not so hard to get to valdemar as you think." She paused to look at the three mages in the room. "What I propose is this: you leave Windstar here, in my personal care, where she receive the training she needs. You may visit her easily, and this will give still more reason to travel to Valdemar regularly. Windstar will receive her training, and the bond between Kai-ling and Valdemar will be all the more strengthened by trust."

  


Elspeth frowned. "I don't know," she said. "Windstar is very young to be alone here."

  


_:Elspeth,:_ Gwena said. _:I think this would be a good thing. Windstar would get the teaching she needs so badly, and you will get some rest from being a mother. Also, Mero has said he would stay is Windstar did.:_

  


Darkwind looked at Elspeth. _:It seems to be a solid plan to me, bright feather. Remember, we will be able to see Windstar whenever we wish. The ships make it possible.:_ Elspeth shifted her weight and sighed. 

  


"We need to ask Windstar what she thinks."

  


~*~*~*~*~*~

  


Windstar watched the ship with her parents and all she knew take off for her homeland. The sun was setting in the west, where the ship was headed. Her right hand rested on Mero's back, and her left hand was spread out to catch some of the wind that was carrying her life away. She had just turned eleven three days before. She wasn't sure she ws ready to be without her parents, but she could go home at any time. As her parent's ship shank into nothing on the horizon, she thought she was happy for this change in her life. She didn't know where the wind would take her now, but she was willing to wait and see. 

  


"I'm going up to my room, Mero." She said. She turned her back on the horizon where her parents had disappeared and faced towards the palace. She walked through the now familiar halls to her new room. This room was hers and hers alone, something that was new to her. It connected to the gardens with the beautiful red and blue birds. She had put some of the bird seed next to her door, so she could try to coax the birds to her. So far, she had been unsuccessful. She decided that now was as good a time as any to feed the birds. She grabbed some of the seed and sat down outside.

  


She didn't really expect anything to happen. She just relaxed, relishing the feeling of the air around her. _My air_, she thought. _Nobody but me to blame for anything now. _She found that thought both terrifying and exciting. She knew now that if she messed up, it was her fault, and no one else's. She was ready for the responsibilities that came with being a mage; or at least as ready as she was ever going to be. 

  


She opened her eyes. She hadn't realized she had closed them. She felt an odd weight on her hand and looked down at it. There, eating the seed from her hand, was one of the red and blue birds. She smiled. "Hello, little bird," she whispered. "My name is Windstar. I'm going to be a mage!"

  


  


~*~*~*~*~*~*~

  


A.N. Wow. I'm so sorry this chapter took so long.. I've been incredibly busy. And, like Windstar, I've been being enlightened. This chapter was as much a journey for me as it ws for Windstar. I hope you like it as much as I do.... Thank you to everyone who has supported me for this story! I would like to dedicate this chapter to Emerald Flame, who has been reviewing my story for a very long time, and to Rebecca, who doesn't want to do her homework. To all of my other readers, I'm very sorry I don't mention you all! I'm simply to tired to put you all in here right now, and you all deserve a lament. Thank you all, and see you next chapter!

~Kestrel

  



	9. Coming Home?

                                                A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

  The Tayledras forests were very beautiful, Eclipse reflected as he walked. His mother used to live among these trees, before she made the fatal mistake of falling in love. Eclipse smiled to himself. He used to believe in love. He remembered hoping against hope that some great mage would come to rescue him and his family from his father. He used to wish for someone to love him, someone who would stay with him. How foolish he had been, to put so much into hopes and wishes! He understood now; his father had taught him well. Hope was something only doomed people believed, and love was nothing but a dream of poets. 

  He bent to pick up a stick from the ground. He twirled it around in his pale fingers, enjoying the feeling of being in control. Eclipse had complete control; he was the most powerful mage in the surrounding countries, excepting his father. He knew that he could make most people bow to him and beg for mercy, could play one person against another like pawns on a chess board. He had everything he needed; power was his key to happiness. 

  The sharp sound of a stick snapping echoed through the forest. Eclipse's smile grew wider. Who needed the fool's dreams of love and hope?

                                                       *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

_:I hate boats. Boats are by far the most wicked invention of humans.:  _The Companion shifted his weight for the umpteenth time. _:You can see over this damned railing. Where are we? Are we almost home?:_

  Windstar laughed at her friend. "Mero, I can see Haven quite clearly now, yes, we're almost home. I think we're about three miles out, probably just above the royal grounds. I'm not sure; I haven't seen Valdemar for six years, Mero. I'm not sure of our exact position."

  Mero tossed his head. _:If I could see over the railing, I could tell you where we are. I've been gone as long as you, but I would know.:_

  "Yes, of course. You being oh so much more knowledgeable than I."

  _:Exactly. It's good you have finally learned your place, child.:_

 The 'child's' white eyebrows rose slightly. "Child, Mero? I have seen seventeen years; I hardly think I am still a child." She looked down at the Companion from her seat on the railing of the ship. Windstar was dressed elegantly and simply, wearing the pocketed breaches she loved so much, and a simple high-necked Kailinese shirt of blue silk. Her long white hair was pulled back in several braids, as was the style in Kai-ling. 

  The Companion stared back at her, his blues eyes meeting hers of silvery blue. _:Perhaps no longer a child, then. That is not for me to decide.: _

  Windstar sighed and slid down the railing of the ship to sit on the deck. "My parents haven't seen me for a long time, Mero. Do you think they'll try to treat me like a child?"

  _:I don't know, Windstar. You have to understand, your parents just want to protect you from the dangers they see. They want you to be safe and happy, and sometimes it's hard for parents to accept that children are not happy when they are being 'kept safe.':_

  Windstar smiled. "I know, Mero. I just don't want them to 'keep me safe.' I can take care of myself perfectly well, I don't need to be sheltered."

  _:Windstar, it's been a long time since they've seen you. You may have to make sure they know you're not the little girl you used to be.: _

  She nodded. "I don't know what I would have done without you, Mero. Being away from Valdemar for so long must have been hard for you, but I couldn't have stayed without you there with me." She looked at her friend. "Mero, you're horse smiling at me. What is it you want to say?"

 Mero huffed at her, and Windstar knew he was laughing at her. "Well, out with it, horse face. What's so funny?"

 Mero stopped shaking, and shook his mane. _:You're funny. You're very impatient, you know.:_  

  "Thank you for the notice. I had no idea."

  Mero snorted again. He shook his head, clearing his mind. _:I'm glad I could be there for you, Windstar. It has been a joy traveling with you. I am glad I got the chance to spend so much time with you.: _He got to his feet and craned his neck, getting a glimpse of Haven. _:I am very glad to be home. I never thought I would be away so long.:  _

  Windstar stood also and looked down at her birthplace. "You've missed Haven," she said. Mero nodded. _:Every day I was gone was like another lash of a whip. I am so glad to be home.:_ Windstar stared at the houses floating underneath her. She frowned. 

  "I wish I could be as happy to be here as you, Mero."

_:Do you miss Kai-ling?:_  

  Windstar shook her head. "No. I don't. I don't miss anywhere, Mero. You've missed your home, but this place has never been home to me. No more than any other place."

  Mero scraped his hoof along the deck. _:I wish I understood, Windstar. Maybe then I could be of some help.:_  

  Windstar smiled at Mero. "I'm not sure there's anything to help, Mero. I just don't feel any connection to places. They're just that. Places. Nothing more, nothing less." 

  _:It saddens me that that is all Valdemar is to you, Windstar. I hope that someday you will find a place to love and call home. I hope the best for you, my friend.:_

  Windstar looked back at Mero, and opened her mouth to say something, but the ship's captain beat her to it. 

   "Docking now! Everyone hold on!" Windstar and Mero sat back down on the deck, waiting for the docking. The crew would tie the ship to tall posts to keep it from floating away. There was always a slight jolt when the power supplies to the ship was cut, often the ship would drop a few feet. It would still hover just off the ground, waiting until the power supplies were back on and it could fly again. 

  Windstar's head twitched slightly as the ship dropped. She and Mero then stood and looked around. They were inside the palace grounds, in a place where only ambassadorial ships rested. She looked at the flat field where they had docked. It was near Companion's Field, not very far from the palace itself. Beside her, Mero nearly danced with excitement. When one of the crew members put down the plank to allow them to get off the ship, Mero flew down it.  

  _:HOME! Home at last!: He reared and bucked, jumping around in joy.  He rolled onto his back and rolled in the grass. _:It has been so long! Too, too long!:__

  Windstar smiled down on her friend. She looked at the plank with less enthusiasm than Mero. She didn't know how she would feel when she set foot on the earth of her 'home.' She wasn't even sure what she was supposed to feel, and she was afraid to find that she didn't feel the way she should. 

  "Windstar!" Her head snapped around, looking for a person. She couldn't find anyone, and she thought she had imagined the call when her eyes met those of her father. 

  He looked very much the same as he had when she last saw him, tall, muscular, and powerful, wearing his white hair braided like all Tayledras. Windstar's fingers went to her own hair, and she realized that she no longer wore hers in the Tayledras style. She had pulled it back into the graceful sleek braids of the Kailinese earlier that morning. 

 A voice broke into her musing, calling her down off the ship. "Windstar! Come down here so I hug you!"

  Windstar smiled and walked down the plank. She paused right before she set her foot on the ground, trying to imagine what she should feel. She was returning to her birthplace after six years away. She shook her head and stepped onto the ground.  She barely had time to balance herself when she was swept off her feet in a bear hug from her father. 

  "Oh, Windstar. It has been too long, my daughter," he whispered in her ear. "Much too long."

  Windstar's arms wrapped around her father. "It has been a long time, father. I am glad to be back." She pulled away from his hug, wanting to get a good look at him. "You look wonderful," she whispered. 

  Darkwind smiled at her, and she thought she saw tears in his eyes. He grasped her shoulder. "Come, Windstar. Your mother is waiting for you. She wants to get something ready for you."

   Windstar grinned and stood up straighter. "What is it, father?"

  Darkwind laughed. "I have no idea. It will be as much a surprise to me as it is to you. Let us go and see what your mother has in store, shall we?"

  Windstar let herself be led towards the palace. She kept a smile on her face, but she couldn't help but feel awful. She felt empty, like the stalk of a plant after the summer sap has run out.

  She had felt nothing when she stepped onto the palace grounds. Nothing at all.

                                                *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Kris, I'm leaving! You can handle all of this, I'm going to go out! Windstar's back! I want to see what those mages have done with her!"

  The golden haired man at the desk nodded quickly. "Right, Lyra. You go, I'll stay here and drown in paper."

  Lyra bowed her head slightly, feeling a little bad about leaving her twin. "I'm sorry, Kris. Do you want me to stay? I'm sure Windstar won't mind…"

  "No, Lyra. Go see our niece. Say hello to her for me. Ask her if she can magic up a way to do paperwork instantly."

  Lyra walked over to ruffle her brother's hair. "I'll do that, Kris. I think you got the rotten deal. You get to take our mother's place, and I get to do political runs all over the country."

  Kris looked up from his desk for the first time in the conversation. "I must admit, this king business is more difficult than I thought it would be. I'm just glad mother is still here to make sure I don't do anything really stupid."

  Lyra smiled. "You have a whole army of people to watch your back, Kris. I don't think you'd be able to do anything stupid even if you tried."

  Kris laughed. "Thank you for your reassurance, and I'm glad you're confident in me. Now, get out of here before I have the guards haul you away."

  Lyra saluted smartly, her back rail straight. "Will do, your Majesty!" She opened the door, and heard Kris yell at her.

  "It's not 'Majesty' yet! I'm not formally the king!"

  Lyra turned to bow while walking backwards out the door. "Yes, sir!"

  Kris opened his mouth to object, but the door closed on his sister before he could say anything. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. Glaring at the papers around him, he mocked his sister. "Yes, sir, my ass. I'm awful at this king business. I wish she'd take the throne. I sure as hell don't want it."

  He looked around the office. "Make sure none of you repeat that to her. She'd throw a fit." Kris got the distinct impression that the furniture was laughing at him.

                                               *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Windstar! Welcome home! How are you?" Lyra charged through the halls, yelling out her greetings to the younger woman. When she reached her niece, she embraced her in a great hug, twirling her around before putting her down. "How have you been? You're so much bigger than last time I saw you! You look wonderful! It's been so long, I've-"

  "Lyra, let her answer one question before asking another! You never stop for a breath, it's hard to get a word in edgewise!" Darkwind's interruption made Lyra blush prettily. She looked at Windstar apologetically. "I'm sorry. How have you been?"

  Windstar smiled. "I have been well. I am grateful for my stay in Kai-ling, but I am glad to be back here."

  Lyra grinned. "Is that all? Can you sum up all the 'how have you beens' in two sentences? This will not do, girl! You must give me more!"

  Windstar opened her mouth to say something, but Darkwind interrupted. "Not quite yet, Lyra. I'm taking Windstar to see her mother, after that you can have her for a while. Until then, I'm afraid she's ours."

  Lyra pouted. "Oh, fine! Be that way!" She winked at Windstar. "See you later," she whispered before tromping off down the hall again. 

  Windstar smiled slightly at the antics of her aunt. Darkwind looked carefully at her. "You can laugh, you know. We'll be glad to hear you make noise."

  Windstar smiled at him. "I will, father. I'm just not used to being back yet. Give me some time to adjust."

  Darkwind smiled. He slung an arm around his daughter's shoulders. "It is overwhelming to be gone for so long, then come home, isn't it?"

  Windstar looked at her father. "You could say that, yes."

  Darkwind smiled. "Let's go see what your mother has planned for you."

  They walked through the stone halls, Windstar wondering what her mother had planned for her. Darkwind was leading her to the council room, and she didn't know what could be waiting for her there. 

  They stopped in front of the door, and Darkwind looked at his daughter. She had grown into a lovely young woman. No one had ever been able to understand why her hair was white, as there where no longer any nodes to bleach it. Firesong had told Darkwind that he thought living in his and Elspeth's presence, it was a miracle that Windstar didn't have wrinkles as well as white hair. 

  As he looked at Windstar, he remembered promising to get to know her better six years ago. He mentally sighed. _We failed that one pretty badly, didn't we? We promised to get to know her, then left her in a foreign country for six years. Once again, I realize that I don't know my own daughter._ He took a deep breath and asked, "Do you think we should knock?"

  Windstar's head snapped around to look at him. She looked like a falcon, with her quick movements and her fierce eyes. Darkwind thought she would be a formidable opponent in an argument. She examined him, then nodded slightly. "I think so. Just to be sure."

  Darkwind nodded and knocked on the door. They heard a crash, and a loud bang as something hit the floor. Father and daughter looked at each other, both with one eyebrow cocked. Suddenly the door flew open and they were face to face with Elspeth. 

  Elspeth looked at the two of them, both standing there with their arms almost crossed both raising their right eyebrow, and she burst out laughing. Her laughter only got worse when the questioning looks on her husband and daughter's faces turned into identical looks of bewilderment. 

  _:You neglected to mention the onset of mother's madness, father,: Windstar Mindspoke. _:Is this recent, or did I just not notice it when I was little?:_ At this, Darkwind broke out laughing as well. Windstar looked from her mother, who was leaning against the door trying to catch her breath, to her father, who had tears streaming down his face. Her eyebrows rose a bit more into her braided crown, as she muttered to herself. She grabbed an elbow of each parent and pulled them into the council room, steering them towards chairs. She looked at them both, her face completely neutral. _

  "Mother, father," she started. "Tell me. What type of narcotic is it?"

  Elspeth and Darkwind looked at each other, and burst into fresh peals of laughter. Windstar's lips twitched until she too started laughing. Elspeth managed to gasp out: "Aren't we supposed to be asking you that, Windstar?" before losing her breath laughing.

  After a while the laughter died down, leaving the trio checking their ribs for cracks and wiping tears from their eyes. Elspeth stood up to look at her daughter. Windstar had fallen to her knees on the floor during the slightly hysterical laughing fit. She now looked up at her mother from her position on the floor. 

  "Hello, mother," She said quietly. 

  Elspeth's straight face broke into a smile and she fell to her knees as well, embracing her daughter. "Hello, Windstar," she whispered back. "Hello, my child."

  Windstar buried her face in her mother's hair, truly happy to see Elspeth again. She had missed them, though she still felt bad for not missing them more than she had. Mother and daughter knelt on the floor, embracing each other. Neither of them had any thoughts of the outside world until they felt another pair of arms wrapping around them as Darkwind joined the hug. "Hello family," he murmured. 

  Windstar finally shifted as her knees protested the stone floor. She looked at her mother. 

 "I hear you have something for me, mother."

  Elspeth snorted. "Nobody ever told me about children and their constant 'give me' crazes."

  Darkwind snorted. "I wouldn't go there if I were you, Elspeth. Weren't you a terror in you childhood? Come to think of it, you still ask me for things.."

  Elspeth smacked her husband. "Yes, Windstar, I do have something for you. But you have to get up off the floor for it."

  "I'm not the only one on the floor, here." Windstar said. The three of them stood up. Windstar noticed that there was something on the table that was covered by a cloth. Her brows furrowed. 

  "I remembered you liking Master Lystai's collection. I thought you might like this.."

 Elspeth pulled the cloth off of the table to reveal a detailed map. Windstar's eyes widened and she leaned in closer. The map was explicitly detailed, showing the lands from the former Empire in the East to the frozen lands north of the Forest of Sorrows, the Tayledras lands, and all the way down south to Kai-ling. The map was drawn on what looked like leather, not paper. Windstar reached out a hand to touch it, but her hand stopped just short. 

  Elspeth smiled and looked at Darkwind. _:I think I chose well, don't you?: _ Darkwind nodded slightly. He didn't think Windstar even knew they were there, she was so absorbed in the map. 

  "You can touch it, you know," Elspeth said quietly. "I put spells on it to keep it from smudging or tearing, even if you get it wet. It's a good travel map; it will survive in most any conditions."

  Windstar reached down to stroke the map. "It's _beautiful_ mother." She smiled and managed to tear her eyes away from the map to look at her mother. "_Thank you._"

  Elspeth hugged her daughter from behind. "You are welcome, Windstar. I'm glad you're home."

  "It's good to be back," Windstar replied. No one commented on her saying 'back' instead of 'home.'

                                               ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lyra felt like she had looked everywhere for her niece. She had checked the ekele in Companion's field where Elspeth and Darkwind lived since the Adept Firesong left. She had checked the stables, the ship Windstar had taken from Kai-ling, and most everywhere else she thought Windstar might hide. She was now walking through Companion's Field, wondering where she hadn't checked.

  She was about ready to give up when she saw a flash of white near a grove of trees. She ran towards the white, and saw that her guess was correct. Windstar's hair was easily spotted against a backdrop of green. 

  The younger woman was sitting on the ground looking at something. Lyra sat herself down next to her niece and tried to see what was captivating Windstar's attention. Failing miserably, she looked at the white-haired woman. "So… Do you have a thing for trees, or are you looking at something in particular?"

  Windstar snorted, snapping out of her reverie. "No, I do not have 'a thing for trees.' My river doesn't flow that way."

  Lyra looked back to the grove. "Then, can you see the invisible men? If you can, tell me. I'm always interested in mysterious suitors."

  Windstar snorted again and looked at Lyra. "My tree is gone."

  Lyra looked at Windstar. "Your tree? Did you have a tree?"

  Windstar nodded. "I used to come sit in the big tree here when I was feeling bad, and it made me feel better. Now, my tree is gone."

  Lyra frowned. "I'm sorry…."

  Windstar laughed. "It's okay, really. I'll be fine, it's just a bit of a shock. I thought that I would come home and everything would be the same. It was pretty stupid, really." 

  Lyra looked at her niece. "I understand. It seems like the world should always stay the same, because you say so. But, somehow, it doesn't. It isn't fun to realize that things go on, with or without you."

  Windstar sighed. "Very true," she paused. "Can I ask you a question?"

  "Of course!"

  Windstar took a deep breath. "When you left Kai-ling and came back here, how did you feel when you got here?"

  Lyra looked at Windstar. "I felt relieved. It was like I'd had a terrible headache the whole time I was gone, and when I got back, it was like a Healer had fixed it."

  Windstar nodded. "I see."

  "Why do you ask?"

  "No reason, really. I just wanted to know what coming home feels like from someone else's view."

  Lyra nodded. "Okay. What did you feel?"

   Windstar looked at the place where her tree used to be. _How can I tell her I felt nothing? I don't think she'd understand that at all. _ 

  "I felt… like I was coming home. It was like jumping into a hot pool after a ride in a snowstorm."

  Lyra grinned. "That too."

  Windstar wished she had felt something. Anything but indifference.

                                            ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tathil watched his master as the man paced up and down the room. 

 "I need more space, Tathil. I can't build what I need with all these damn trees in the way." The mage sighed. "Cut them down. I want the space clear by next week."

  Tathil nodded. "Yes sir."

A.N. Well… It's only been forever since I updated… I'm very, very sorry. I've been busy, and busier… It's been crazy. However, if you people are interested in reading other stuff I have written…. *commence shameless self plugging* I have written two Harry Potter stories, if you like those…. Walkabout, which is a work in progress, and Hidden Strengths, which is a one-shot. I will try very, very hard to speed up my updates for DOTES… I'm so sorry it's been so long. I hope this chapter makes up for it! Now, I have to go… I was supposed to have done some pre-calculus by now, and I still need to write some chemistry lab report. Thank you to anyone who reads this after so long! 

  ~Kestrel


	10. Fitting In

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

_She was walking through a forest. The trees were enormous, bigger than any she had seen before. The forest was wild; somehow, she knew few people ever came into this forest, and fewer still came out. She could hear animals of all sorts around her, some loud, like the scream of the hawk, some quiet, dancing on the edge of her mind. The forest sang its strange song to her, lulling her into peacefulness. _

_She kept walking, taking in her surroundings. She smiled at the baby trees in the space cleared by a fallen elder; she felt sorrow for the fallen creature who left its bones to decorate the forest floor. She was awed by the forest around her; it was truly beautiful. She felt like she could keep walking forever, and never reach the end. _

_And yet suddenly, she did. One moment, she was surrounded by forest, another, she was standing in a clearing. Her eyes went wide. There were dead tree stumps all around her, the charred remains of bushes and branches spread all around. She felt a tear fall down her cheek. It was horrible. There was so much life in the forest, and here, in this clearing, a part of that life had died. _

_A flash of white caught her eye in the faded brown and black of the clearing. She walked towards it, almost stopping when she realized the white was hair on a man's head. She kept walking towards the man._

_Stopping close to him, she tried to decide what to say. The man's back was facing her, she had to say something to get his attention. She opened her mouth to say something, just as he turned to face her. Their eyes locked, silver on silvered blue. She saw terrible pain in the man's eyes, pain like that of the dead forest around him. She reached out a hand to touch his shoulder; he placed his hand over hers, clinging desperately. Their eyes searched for something, neither knew what, but both knew that they would be complete when they found whatever it was. She opened her mouth to speak again—_

CRASH.

Windstar flew out of her bed, attempting a defensive crouch and failing miserably as she fell out of her bed, tangled in her sheets. She landed on her face, on the rug covering the stone floor with a resounding thump. Yelping, she untangled herself from her sheets, sitting up and rubbing her forehead.

She scowled. She thought hard about a barely remembered dream, knowing it was important but not understanding why. She knew something was about to happen, in that dream, but she'd missed it.

"Dammit!" She growled. The dream was gone, with it any chances of understanding. Windstar stood up quickly, grimacing as her head throbbed. She sighed. _'Lovely first day back,'_ she thought. _'You get out of bed and fall directly on your face. Lovely omen, that.'_ She tried to remember why she had woken in the first place.

"Wait. What crashed?"

She walked to the door of the room she had in her parents' ekele. She sighed again. She had wanted to stay in her own rooms, but her parents had not left any room for discussion. Windstar wondered if they would ever see her as an adult, or if she would forever be their baby Windstar.

Walking out towards the main rooms with a hand still on her head, she looked around, trying to find her parents. _'Where **are**__they?'_ She heard laughter in the gardens, so she walked in that direction.

She turned around an outcropping of small trees to be confronted with the sight of her parents, her grandparents, Kerowyn, and her aunt and uncle, all in the hot spring, all quite naked. She tried to back away before they spotted her, but no luck.

"Windstar! Why don't you join us, kidling? I haven't talk to you in ages! I want to hear everything!" Kris grinned up at her. Windstar tried very hard not to blush. She realized this sort of situation wouldn't have bothered her at all six years ago, but that was before she had spent six years in the palace of Kai-ling, where modesty was prized above many other traits.

"I.. Erm.." She stalled, trying to figure out what the younger her would have done. She blushed slightly when she realized that the younger Windstar would have stripped her clothing and jumped in with the adults.

Daren grinned up at Windstar also. "Is that a blush I see, Windstar?" He winked devilishly at her, causing her blush to deepen.

"Too long, niece of mine." Lyra had snuck up behind her and without any more warning, shoved Windstar into the water. Windstar grabbed behind her, pulling her aunt into the pool with her, sending water flying everywhere. Windstar surfaced quickly, shaking water from her hair.

"You clown, Lyra! Now I'm soaking wet!"

Kero snorted. "I'd think you'd be used to it, kidling, as you've been living on an island for six years."

Windstar blinked again, then sank up to her neck in the warm water. "Point taken."

The group laughed. Darkwind leaned over to ruffle his sopping daughter's hair. "I see you're still not a morning person, Windstar."

The white haired girl shuddered. "No. Never ever, not even after Lystai made me help the kitchens prepare breakfast every morning for a year. I will wake in the morning, but I shall never enjoy this side of noon."

Elspeth snorted. "Noon, Windstar? When do you ever get things done, if you don't wake until noon?"

"At night, of course. It's the best time of day, if you ask me. Fewer people to bother a person."

"A little anti-social, are we?" Kris teased.

"Just a little. Only around people like you, though."

Lyra choked on her fruit drink. "Nicely done, Windstar! Nicely done indeed!" Kris pouted, looking around the group at the grinning faces. "I feel so unloved."

At this, and Kris' outrageous stage frown, everyone burst out laughing, except Windstar, who simply smiled.

Darkwind frowned slightly and leaned towards his daughter. "You can laugh, you know. I know the Kailinese don't like to show their emotions, but you are free to share with us."

Windstar started slightly. "I know. I'm just not used to being back yet. I'm sorry.."

Elspeth smiled and wrapped an arm around her daughter. "It is good to have you back, little one. We missed you."

Windstar smiles hesitantly. "I missed you too, Mother." _Did you, Windstar? Did you really?_ The voice in her head just had to ask the question that had been bothering her for days. _Did you miss Valdemar at all? You don't seem to feel any different, now that you're back._ Windstar wished the voice would go away. She didn't want to think about it, because if she thought about it, she would have to answer the questions the voice asked. She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answers.

"Windstar!" Windstar's head snapped around to look at Kris. "Are you planning on staying in the pool wearing your sleep clothes, or are you going to be like the rest of us, and wear your skin and nothing else?"

Windstar blushed slightly and climbed out of the pool to remove her clothing. She took of her sopping night clothes and folded them neatly. Then she turned back towards the pool.

Kris whistled when she turned around. "Nice, Windstar! Very nice!" Windstar mock glared at him. "Like what you see?" She posed for him.

Kris laughed. "I would, if you weren't my niece, you fiend."

"Fiend. Hmm. I can do fiend." Windstar leapt into the pool, send a wave straight into Kris' face. The young king spluttered. "Ahh! You can't do that! I'm the king, I protest!"

Windstar's head surfaced. "I'm sorry Kris, did you say something?"

The rest of the pool occupants laughed as Kris pouted again. "I hate you all," he said. "Poo to you." Windstar smiled and settled back into her seat against the wall next to her mother. Maybe it was good to be home…

Windstar wandered around the palace halls, wondering where she was going. She'd been home for several weeks, and she wasn't sure where she hadn't been yet. She supposed she could visit the library again. Her stomach had other ideas. She started as it rumbled loudly.

"Hungry already? Well then. Kitchens it is, I suppose."

She turned and headed for the Herald mess kitchens. She could go to the palace kitchens, but she remembered the cooks there being rather stuffy. There was a chance she'd meet someone she knew in the Herald kitchens.

She walked more quickly than most, wanting to get out of the small enclosed halls. She'd lived her whole life in stone buildings, but the few visits to the Vales with her parents had convinced her that open forest was much, much better than enclosed stone hallways.

Reaching the kitchens, she saw Talia and Dirk sitting at one of the tables talking to the new trainees. She smiled and walked towards them, deciding food could wait a bit.

"Talia, Dirk, it's been a long time!" She exclaimed, stopping near their table. The two lovers looked up at her. Talia broke into a wide grin and stood up to embrace Windstar.

"Hello, little one. You've been gone too long," Talia whispered into her ear. Windstar smiled and squeezed the shorter woman in her arms. "I've missed you," Windstar whispered. She was surprised to find that that was the truth – She had missed Talia.

They pulled apart and sat down at the table. Dirk reached across the table top to turn Windstar's face his way.

"You've grown into a beautiful young woman, Windstar," Dirk said quietly, smiling at her. Windstar blushed slightly and muttered a thank you. She smiled at Dirk and Talia.

"I think the 'young woman' part of that touched me more than my being beautiful, Dirk." Windstar said.

Talia laughed. "Are your parents still treating you like a little girl, then?"

"_Yes!_" Windstar said emphatically. "They've been worse, but you'd think I'm old enough to leave the house without getting a 'stay safe' lecture and a curfew!"

Dirk chuckled and handed Windstar a bread roll from the basket that had been handed to him. She took the roll and began tearing it apart.

"Your parents are just trying to show you that they love you, Windstar. They want you to be safe. That.. Clouds their vision, sometimes." Talia said, tearing pieces off her own roll.

"I know that, and I love them too," Windstar grumbled. "I just want to have some sense of freedom here. I almost want to go back to Kai-ling, where I at least got some respect and privacy."

Talia gave Windstar a small smile. "It will get better, Windstar. Give your parents some time. They're adapting, just like you are. It's going to take time, for all of you."

Windstar closed her eyes and ran her hands through her loose white hair. Talia was right, she supposed. She wasn't being patient enough with Darkwind and Elspeth. She just wished things would go more quickly. She hated feeling like such an outsider in the place that was supposed to be her home.

Talia watched Windstar. She could feel the confusion radiating from the younger woman; but more powerful than that, she could feel… Loneliness? Windstar felt like she was alone. Talia didn't let her emotions show on her face. She felt badly for Windstar. The girl was different. She always had been. She'd never quite fit in with her peers, and her peers had never tried to make her feel welcome.

From what Talia understood, Windstar's age peers had been ignoring her for the most part. Ever since the girl returned, people had been dancing around her. Only family members and family friends got close to her; to everyone else, she was untouchable. She was too smart, too powerful, too dignified, and yet too human for people to really understand. They weren't comfortable around Windstar. People didn't know how to act around the 'child genius.'

Windstar sighed and quickly swallowed the last of her roll. Talking to Talia always used to make her feel better. When she was little, at least. Now, though, she wanted to hear Lystai's calming voice more than anything else. Her eyes slid out of focus as she looked to the South. She missed her friends. She missed the mages in Kai-ling. They understood her. She'd been treated like a student, and then like an equal with the Kailinese mages.

Here in Valdemar, though, people looked at her like she was a god. They looked at her like she was someone to be respected, feared, and left alone.

She was tired of being a god.

Her peers avoided her, her parents and the other mages still treated her like a child. Windstar had never felt so lonely. At least in Kai-ling, she'd had the mages.

"I think I'm going to go for a walk," Windstar said. She thought a visit with Mero might improve her mood.

Dirk grinned at her from his seat. "Remember to come visit us, alright Windstar? "

It took Windstar a few moments to register Dirk's request.

"Yes.. Of course.. I'll see you later." Without another word, she stood to leave, ghosting out of the room, her hunger forgotten.

Dirk watched her leave, then turned to Talia. He looked at her carefully, waiting for her to tear her eyes away from Windstar's back. When she didn't, he leaned closer to her.

"Is there a problem, love?"

Talia blinked, finally breaking her continuous stare after the young mage.

"There might be, Dirk. There might be."

Author's Note:

Right.. This chapter took ages, and I know it. I'm so sorry to everyone who waited.. Every WORD of this was like pulling teeth. I'm still not completely happy with it.. But it's time to move on. If I don't get to Dance chapter ten soon, I never will. So, I need to just get on with it.

I hope everyone understands.. And I hope you don't hate this chapter too much. Thanks to anyone who actually reads this!

Kestrel


	11. kValdemar

Dance on the Edge of Sanity

Eclipse woke with a start, rolling into an attack position as he kicked the black silk sheets from around his legs. _Something_ had woken him, some sort of crashing sound. Something had fallen on the wooden floor—

There were no wooden floors in the castle. It was all stone.

_What in hell?_ Eclipse probed all the rooms around his own, and found everything was normal. There wasn't a thing within a hundred feet of him that could have crashed.

_Odd_, he thought. _I would have sworn something fell. Maybe it was a dream?_ He ran a hand through his thick white hair, frowning as it caught on the sleep tangles. _I was dreaming about something.. A girl? Not any of the girls I know.._ He snorted. _Eclipse old boy, I think you need to get out more. You're dreaming up women for yourself._

Eclipse grinned lightly and threw himself back against his pillows. It was godawful early in the morning, but he knew he wasn't going to get back to sleep. Something had him deeply unsettled. The dream again?

_Who was she, anyways?_ His legs tried to fidget; he stopped them with a scowl. Weaker men fidgeted. He was going to get to the bottom of this, not fidget and fret over it.

It hadn't Felt like a real dream. Perhaps it had been Foresight.. He chased after that thought, seeing no other logical path. _A Vision of a white-haired girl. Hmm. Well, white hair certainly indicates Mage-power, and lots of it. She'd be a Void worker, then, what with no nodes.. Foresight, Mage girl. Maybe it's that girl I am to kill? I could be seeing the battle.._

Somehow, that didn't feel right.

He growled in frustration. _This is getting me nowhere. It was _just_ a dream. Get out of bed and do something useful, you're obviously not going to get back to sleep._

Throwing the covers off his naked form, he stalked to his wardrobe and snapped open the doors. Yards of black cloth greeted him.

_You need to branch out, my friend. Black and black and black gets a little old._ _Ah, well.. Black robes today. The long robes. They make me look taller. I like that._

He shrugged into the neck to floor black silk robes and turned with a smile to the mirror. Grabbing the comb from his bedside table, he smoothed out the tangles as he eyed his reflection. Somewhat tall, though not towering, thin and muscular, long white hair, tan skin, blue-silver eyes.. He was a figure to break hearts, and he knew it. When his hair was brushed, he winked at himself and started towards his workroom.

His father thought him mad for insisting on dressing himself of a morning, but he simply couldn't stomach people early in the morning. After breakfast, and a few hours of spellcasting; then he was less likely to kill whoever came near him.

Not that killing the servants was a problem.. He could conjure more, but it was damned messy to clean up the bodies. Usually, mess annoyed him more than people, for which the servants were no doubt grateful.

The grey light of early morning shown through the windows of the hallway, making Eclipse sigh deeply. Morning light was too… Bright. Afternoon light was golden, and warm, at least in the summer. In the winter, he didn't bother with daytime anyways.

His workroom was his haven. It was the only place that was his, here in his father's stronghold. The door had no lock, of course, only his father's rooms had locks. However, everything in this room was there because he wanted it there.

_Except for that…_ Eclipse stared at the golden eagle perched on one of the bookshelves. There was nothing unusual about the eagle—except that it was in his workroom. His workroom, which had no windows. Keeping his eyes on the bird, he grabbed the heavy leather gloves that he used in some mage work and advanced towards the eagle. He wasn't about to get his hands clawed off by a stupid bird..

He walked forward slowly, eyes fixed on the bird. This was a bondbird.. There was no way a wild eagle would be that big, with a head shaped like that.

_A bondbird in my room.. Did he belong to one of father's captives? That can't be right.. He doesn't look distraught enough. Again, the question; _why_ is there a bird in my room?_

He was only a few feet away from the bird now. He slowly extended a gloved hand towards the eagle, to see if the bird would make taking him outside easy for Eclipse. Instead of stepping onto the offered hand, though, the eagle looked straight up at him, into his eyes.

_Oh.. My.. _

_:I am Sabyn. You are mine now, Eclipse.:_

Eclipse could only nod dumbly. The shock of being bonded to this bird was too much, too early in the morning.. He blinked slowly. _:How did you know my name:_ he asked the bird. _Is he smart enough to know how to answer that? Bondbirds are smart, but probably not that smart.._

_ :I have always known your name.:_ The bird shrugged; an amazing feat for a bird. Any other time, Eclipse would have demanded a better answer than that. Now, though, he was too dazed to do anything but nod.

_How do I explain this to father?..._

"And then, Darian over there tells me it's nothing but an illusion!" The young black haired woman glared at the offender. "I thought you were supposed to reserve the little magic you have, not use it on parlor tricks to scare little girls?"

"You're hardly little, Skyfire, and I needed the practice on illusions anyways," Darian replied easily from his seat across the hot pool. Skyfire's green eyes continued glaring, though it was obvious she was trying not to laugh.

"He's telling the truth, Skyfire.. I did tell him to practice his illusions. They're good for control," Firesong told the girl next to him. He turned his scar seamed face towards his student. "However, I didn't intend for you to terrorize my daughter.. Though I must admit, it does make a very amusing story."

Skyfire scowled and sent a wave of water flying at her father with her arm. "Some help you are, Father! I feel so unloved." She stuck her tongue out at them all and hoisted herself out of the pool, mock stomping away.

Darian frowned. "She's not actually angry, is she?" He worried, glancing at Silverfox.

"No, she's just engaging in the theatrics both she and her father love so." Firesong snorted good-naturedly and elbowed his lover's ribs.

"Like father like daughter, they say.." He grinned at them.

"Given the choice, I would have suggested she be more like her other father," Darian muttered. "It would certainly make her calmer." Silverfox smiled serenely.

Skyfire stopped stomping as soon as she was out of hearing range, giggling to herself. It was fun to bait Darian, truly. She walked down one of the paths that would take her to Nightwind and the gryphons. Maybe Nightwind would be ready for another trondi'irn lesson, now that she and Skyfire had both had some time to rest.

She was glad her fathers approved of her chosen occupation of trondi'irn. Skyfire had always worried Firesong would be disappointed that she wasn't a mage, but it seemed she had underestimated him. She thought most people did underestimate him; and after careful thought and a conversation with her other father, she'd come to the conclusion that Firesong liked it that way. If people underestimated him, he could work without the weight of other's expectations on him.

Silverfox, of course, approved of her ambitions to become a trondi'irn. He'd helped her choose that life path, in fact. It hadn't been a hard choice.. She'd adored the gryphons from the moment she was born, and would walk through the nine hells barefoot to ensure the safety of her winged friends. She'd also thought of becoming a kestra'chern, but eventually she'd decided on the career that gave her more time with the gryphons.

Finding that Nightwind wasn't in the Vale, she headed for the outskirts of their territory, where she knew the trondi'irn sometimes went to sunbathe. It wasn't always a good idea to go this far from the Vale, but there hadn't been any reports of danger from this area for months. She could always call the gryphons, if she needed help.

Or so she thought.

"Eclipse." Icestorm glided into the workroom, his face intent. "I have a test for you. An opportunity has presented itself to us."

Eclipse raised an eyebrow carefully and slowly stood from his work bench. "An opportunity, Father?" He'd hidden the eagle in his bedroom, buying himself a little more time before a confrontation with his father. "What sort of opportunity?"

"That fool student of mine has made a fatal mistake. He's bred, and hasn't taught the whelp obedience, or the first thing about safety. She regularly wanders out where no one can guard her.. Stupid child."

"You wish to use her against your student, Father?" Eclipse hazarded. Icestorm nodded. "Indeed. He would be distraught if his precious daughter went missing, and would come looking for her without stopping to use what brain he has."

Eclipse snorted. "A sentimental fool, is he?" His father glared at him like a student who has just stated the most obvious part of the lesson, and missed the rest. Eclipse just stared back. "What is it you wish me to do, then?" he asked.

"You will bring me the girl. Make sure you make enough of a magical ruckus that Firesong will notice you, but not enough that he will be able to follow you right away. I will deal with him myself."

Eclipse nodded curtly. It sounded like a menial task; kidnap a little girl? How.. mundane. Well, he'd learned early and well that it was unwise to disobey his father's wishes, so he would go fetch the girl. Who knew, maybe she'd be pretty.

In the back of his mind, he felt Sabyn's disapproval. Stifling a sigh, he blocked the bird out.

She tumbled head over foot, screaming as she tried to avoid the boulders in her path. She had no idea what had hit her, but whatever it was, it had hit _hard_. Cursing, Skyfire managed to stop her tumble and get to her feet before she broke her neck. She wished she'd brought a knife with her.. Firesong told her stories about evil; she knew what dwelled in these forests! How could she be so stupid?

She looked around the clearing, looking for what had attacked her. Where, and more importantly, what was it? Whatever it was, she had a nasty feeling it wasn't going to go away..

She turned around carefully, still unable to see anything besides trees and rocks. When she'd almost turned all the way around, another blow slammed into the side of her head. Skyfire gasped and tumbled to her knees, grabbing at her attacker. Her hands gripped cloth, but she didn't see anyone there.

_He's invisible? How can that be?_ Skyfire managed to flip over towards the person she'd grabbed, and saw that he wasn't invisible, exactly... It was just almost impossible to keep her eyes on him. _Interesting_, she thought, trying to form a plan. The plan died early as a kick to her ribs made her struggle for air.

_Try something, girl! Anything!_ "Stop!" she gasped, groping for the man again. "I haven't done anything to you—" Again, a kick stopped her plan from getting anywhere. Skyfire realized suddenly that this person wasn't interested in talking, nor did she think it wanted to kill her... She looked up to see a fist coming at her head.

_I hope this works..._ _:FATHER:_ Skyfire screamed with her tiny Mindspeech gift, right before she lost consciousness.

Firesong smiled to himself as he walked. Domestic life suited him, he thought. He'd thought it would be boring, but how could you _ever_ get bored making sure your charges didn't kill, maim, or otherwise damage each other? _The man who can get bored keeping a domestic life running properly is a better man than me, I suppose_, Firesong thought.

He grinned. _I'd have paid good money to see the look on Skyfire's face when Darian set the elephant illusions on her_. He knew he shouldn't be laughing at his daughter's expense… But it was _so_ funny!

_I wonder if Darian would call up the elephant illusions for me? He said he'd seen pictures, but I haven't. I don't really know what they look like…_ Firesong was happy. He had nothing to do, nothing had blown up, gotten ill, been injured, or destroyed, or maimed, or anything else that needed his attention. There hadn't been any crises for months, and he was loving it.

As if the thought brought it on, a feeling of dread washed over Firesong. Something was happening, something magical—

_:FATHER:_ The Mindcall made his "ears" ring. He'd never heard Skyfire shout like that; judging from her Mindvoice, something was terribly wrong.He groped for the link, hoping to make contact with her to ask what was happening—

Where his daughter's mind should have been, there was nothing. Absolute silence met his probe. The area where he thought she was reeked of untrained magic. He broke into a run in the direction of the call, Mindtouching Silverfox, Darian, and Starfall as he ran.

_:Something is wrong with Skyfire. I got a frantic Mindcall from her, and now there's nothing. I'm going to where I think she was, follow me as soon as possible.:_ He cut the link right after that; he knew they'd try and talk him into thinking about a plan, and Skyfire didn't have _time_ for that. He knew that, in his heart. He wasn't about to let his daughter die while they _planned_.

He broke into a clearing of rocks and boulders at a dead run, slowing so he wouldn't trip. Skyfire had definitely been here very recently; he could Feel traces of her all over the clearing. He ran towards the center of the clearing and fell to his knees. There was fresh blood on the stones.

"Skyfire.. No.." Rage clouded his vision. Who had done this? Who would attack a child like this? His hands shook as he searched the clearing for clues. It had been a mage.. A powerful, but clumsy one. Someone he could take alone… Someone who had more power than was reasonable, without nodes.. _A _bloodmage His vision clouded even further. _How _dare_ a bloodmage touch my daughter?_ He got to his feet, following the trail of magic into the forest. _Fool; he left a trail a blind man could follow!_

Firesong snarled and shoved the bushes out of his way; Goddess help anything that got between him and his daughter now. He shoved further into the forest, not noticing as a branch sliced deeply into his arm. He was close, he could Feel Skyfire's presence. She was awake, now…

He shoved through the last bush, stumbling into a clearing. His daughter had collapsed on her knees in the middle, her arms tied behind her back, her mouth gagged with a silk scarf. Firesong felt his heart stop for a moment when he saw her, thank the gods_, alive. _

His elation was short-lived, as Skyfire shook her head rapidly at him and rocked back towards the way Firesong had come. _:Father, get out now:_ Firesong shook his head furiously, spun his shields ten times stronger, and took two steps towards his daughter.

Ten times stronger apparently wasn't enough. He froze where he stood, mage bonds holding him in place. _Where is he getting this power?_ He wondered desperately. _This isn't blood magic, but there aren't any nodes!_

"Stupid as always, my dear student. I counted on you rushing off in a panic. You haven't disappointed me, this time." The voice behind him sounded oddly familiar… Skyfire sobbed in front of him, driving all coherent thought from his head. _Skyfire… _He struggled against the bonds, throwing everything he had at them. He had to get to his daughter, _now_.

Whatever this mage's secret was, thought, it was too powerful for Firesong. Without the node power, he wore his reserves down pitifully fast.

"You always were my stupidest student, dear Firesong. So much potential, but so little discipline…"

Icestorm stepped in front of him, blocking his daughter from view. "To think, they flocked to _you_. Look at you now, unable to break bonds my son could have broken at ten. You _have_ fallen far, haven't you?" All Firesong could do was glare as his old teacher smirked and ripped the mask off Firesong's face. "You had beauty and power.. It seems both have deserted you now, dear child."

Firesong heard Skyfire sobbing again, through the haze of his own pain. Icestorm stepped back to watch them both, laughing pleasantly at what he saw.

_ Wrong_.

Windstar's eyes snapped open, coming out of her afternoon meditation in seconds. Something was wrong; very wrong, in the north.

_Errold's Grove. That's where the problem is. You have to go there._

Go? _But I don't know where Errold's Grove is… _

_Go._

Windstar staggered to her feet, trampling the pansies behind her in her haste. She had to go north. She didn't know why, or how, or even where, but she knew she had to go.

A hand on her shoulder suddenly restrained her. She pushed uselessly against it.

"Let me go. I have to go." She said. Her voice sounded far away.

Elspeth frowned at her daughter. "You're not going anywhere but bed, young lady. You look terrible."

Windstar could only tug on her mother's stronger grip as she stared desperately to the north. This was _exactly_ the wrong time for Elspeth to get all motherly!


	12. On the Road Again

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

Skyfire dragged herself out of her sleep haze inch by inch. She couldn't remember ever having so much trouble waking… Opening her eyes, she saw a stone floor.

_… the hell? There's no stone in the Vale…_ What in hell had happened, and where was she?

"I see you've finally woken," an unfamiliar voice said behind her. "It's about time… I was starting to wonder if I'd broken your skull with that last kick." The completely uncaring tone of the stranger's voice made the hair on the back of Skyfire's neck stand on end. She raised her head quickly to see who this man was, but immediately went limp as the back of her skull throbbed painfully. The mystery man chuckled.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you. I'm fairly certain you've a nasty concussion." Skyfire yelped as a booted toe poked the back of her head. She brought her hands up to protect her head, curling into a small ball on the floor.

"Still hurts, does it? Well, damn. My aim with that foot was never particularly good." Skyfire growled, but held still. He spoke as though her head were a kick ball! She tried to think of something witty to say, but thought better of it.

"Who are you?" the man asked, from somewhere above her. Skyfire raised an incredulous eyebrow, though her capture couldn't see it. _He kidnapped me, and he's asking me who I am? What is he, stupid? _The toe poked her again, forcing her to turn over onto her back.

"I mean, I know you're the mage Firesong's child, but that doesn't tell me anything. Do you have a name?"

"I do," Skyfire snapped. "I'm not giving it to you, though." She glared in the man's general direction; her vision wasn't working that far away yet. _Must have been the kick to the head_.

"I see." Suddenly, he kicked her hard in the side. "You sure about that?"

She gasped, and tried to shrink into the floor. Had he broken a rib? She yelped and turned on her side when he kicked her again, in the same spot. "It's just your name, after all. Nothing important."

Her eyes squeezed shut as she bit her lips. _Don't tell him anything, Skyfire. Not a word._. She braced herself, waiting for another blow. It never came, though. After waiting for several minutes, she rolled onto her back and carefully sat. _Where did he go?_ The man didn't seem to be in the room, though she hadn't heard him leave. _That's really strange…_.

She was sitting in the middle of a plain stone room. The room was perfectly square, with no windows, and oddly, no door that she could see. She made a mental note to watch as the man entered and exited, to see if the door was hidden, or something else. Shifting her weight slowly, she got to her hands and knees and crawled into one of the corners of the room. Skyfire slumped against the walls on either side of her.

_Crawling four feet took way more energy than it should have… Is this normal for someone with a head injury?_ Her head hurt terribly; shaking it to clear her eyes only made it worse. Lights danced in front of her as her eyes slid shut and she passed out.

"You have what you want, Icestorm. Let my daughter go." Firesong knew better than to let his old teacher see how desperate he was; he kept his voice carefully flat. Looking at the other Adept, though, he knew he wasn't fooling anyone.

Icestorm laughed, a cold sound that would have had no place on the man's lips twenty years ago. Firesong didn't understand how his caring, though strict teacher had become this.. Creature, in front of him.

He struggled uselessly against the bindings holding his arms behind his back. "Please, teacher, let her go. She's served her part. She lured me into your trap. Why would you need the bait, once the fish is caught?" Firesong inwardly cursed himself for his own stupidity. He'd walked right into this one… _I'd never have fallen for this trap ten years ago.._ 'Before you were a father…' a little voice in the back of his mind said.

_Just because you're a father doesn't mean your brains got kicked out, Firesong,_ he thought to the voice. _If you'd _thought _first, you wouldn't be here, and you'd have a thousand better chances to get Skyfire out of this mess. Idiot. _

_:Wool gathering again, Firesong? That always was a bad habit of yours.:_ Icestorm's Mindvoice grated inside his head, breaking him out of his brooding.

"I have much use for her, actually," the older mage said, switching back to speech. "You see, _you_ care for her, and that makes her a perfect tool to get to you."

Firesong paled. "And what do you want from me, Icestorm? I might just give it to you, if you let her go—"

Firesong's old mentor burst out laughing; the cruel noise sent shivers down Firesong's spine. What had happened, to turn Icestorm into this?

"_Dear_ Firesong," Icestorm purred. "I want you to believe that when you die, there will be no one who will miss you, _no one_ who will care about you anymore." The man leaned close, his white eyes boring into Firesong. "I want you to know you have been forgotten, left behind for more interesting news. Just like I was.."

It really had been easy, now that she thought about it. Her mother had let her go more easily than Windstar had thought she would; once Elspeth had been convinced she wasn't ill or insane, she'd done everything she could to make the trip to k'Valdemar easier. It had been Elspeth's idea to ask the Kailinese for a ride, since they were headed that way for trading anyways.

She'd not expected her parents to come along, though. _That_ had been a last minute change of plan for all of them. Right as the ship was about to take off, it had been stopped by her mother's yell; her parents had boarded, and they'd left. Darkwind told her he thought Elspeth's Foresight had something to do with it. She'd apparently woken up with the plan to go with Windstar so firmly planted in her head, nothing would shake it.

So, Windstar was headed to Errold's Grove and k'Valdemar, along with Darkwind, Elspeth, and Mero.

And Gwena. The Companion mare hated sailing and all permutations thereof with a passion.

_:Have I mentioned that I despise boats? I want to have my hooves on the _ground_ damn it all.:_ Darkwind snorted, casting an amused glance at the Companion from where he was leaning next to his daughter. Gwena glared back at him.

_:Oh shut it, you tree dweller, you. You're not allowed to comment.:_

"I said nothing, my lady," Darkwind said, with a teasing bow. "Nothing whatsoever."

Windstar stifled a giggle as the mare grumbled in their minds. From what she'd heard, Gwena had calmed down a great deal as she got older, and she'd apparently done this by trading pigheadedness for sarcasm.

As far as Windstar was concerned, it had been a good trade. She could hardly imagine Gwena as the interfering, controlling pest she "used to be".

Darkwind moved closer to his daughter, smiling broadly. "I don't think she hates this nearly as much as she'd have us think," he said, leaning on the railings and enjoying the view. "So tell me.. Do you have any idea what we're sailing into? You and your mother both have something pushing you, but I'm afraid I'm completely in the dark."

Windstar grinned lopsidedly at her father. "Mother wouldn't want to think of it as being pushed, you know. She'd probably turn the ship around if you reminded her."

Darkwind grinned back. "This is true. Note I only say anything when your mother _isn't_ on the.. Dock?"

"Deck. I had noticed that," Windstar leaned over the railings as well, watching the trees rush beneath them. "I actually have no idea what called me this way; all I know is that it's important I be there." She scowled up at the clouds. "Some help the Foresight is.. It just says 'go!', then won't leave me alone until I do!"

Darkwind smiled. "It is the same with your mother's, and her mother's. I personally am glad not to have it."

"I'd be glad not to have it, too. I prefer my other, more _predictable_ Gifts. Even on bad days, they don't give me nearly as much trouble as the Foresight does!" Windstar made a face at the trees below her. "It was different this time, too," she muttered. "Usually I just get a feeling, or a flash of a vision. This time, I would have sworn there was someone whispering in my ear, telling me what to do. It was really odd."

Her father just shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you, _ke'chara. _I don't know enough about how Foresight is supposed to feel to tell you what you felt. It seems your mother felt something similar, though, so I can only assume that it was a true warning, and we had best heed it."

Windstar smiled at her father's practicality. "I don't think I could not heed it, actually. I do wish it would tell me what to expect, though."

He shrugged again. "Well, we will be able to visit Firesong and Silverfox. We'd been planning to visit them anyways. It's been a while since we've seen Skyfire; I'd like to see what sort of demon Firesong's bred."

Windstar snickered loudly. "She's probably the same sort of demon she was a few years ago, only bigger and better at sneaking and pranking."

Darkwind shuddered. "Terrifying thought. It took me a month to find all the 'gifts' she put in my things. The spiders in the bed were the worst, though. Let me tell you something, about romance.. Spiders do not enhance it."

The young Adept snorted and leaned more comfortably on the ship railing. "I'll make sure to remember that, father. No spiders in the bed for a romantic evening."

"See that you do. It is quite disruptive to the romancing." Darkwind smiled. He'd been afraid that Windstar wouldn't come out from behind the cool mask she'd been wearing since she'd returned home; afraid that she'd stay distant and keep himself and Elspeth at arms length, along with everyone else. She seemed much more comfortable now, though, than she had in the past few weeks. Now that she was doing something, instead of just pattering around the palace trying to find a place for herself.

That made sense, though. She'd gone from having a very defined place as a student in Kai-ling, to having a potentially powerful but utterly undefined position as a royal in Valdemar. In retrospect, that would have made him uncomfortable, too.

_:Elspeth, we should help Windstar find a real place in Haven, once we return. I don't think she's happy being home, but having nothing to do.:_

_:Hmm.. I hadn't thought of that but it makes sense, doesn't it? I wouldn't be happy drifting like she has, either. Maybe we should recruit her for teaching:_

_:Maybe. I think she'd probably like that.:_

Windstar was giving him that look. The one with the raised eyebrow that said she knew they were talking about her, and she's like to be included in the conversation, please. He smiled apologetically at her.

_:Your mother and I were thinking you should help us teach some of the students, when we get back.:_

Elspeth and Darkwind had been expecting some excitement, some pleasure at being given something to do. They weren't expecting what they got, though.

_:Really! I love to do that! Could I? I know I'm young, but Lystai let me teach the beginners. I wasn't sure you'd let me do it here.. I've been helping some of the students with their homework, but could I actually teach:_

Elspeth grinned, though neither Darkwind nor Windstar could see it. _:I don't see why you couldn't, _ke'chara She said._ :If you have experience teaching, I don't see how we couldn't take you help! We've got way more students than I ever dreamed we'd have; which is wonderful, but it's damned hard to teach them all.:_

Darkwind nodded. While they hadn't been stretched past their teaching limits yet, it would be useful to have another teacher for the beginning set. Maybe even for the more advanced classes…. Windstar was a fully trained mage, after all. All she lacked now was experience, and that might not be a problem for her teaching abilities.

Windstar was grinning. _:I think I could help with that, actually. Lystai let me teach a lot, in the year or so before I left. He said part of being a true master was the ability to pass knowledge on to others. I enjoyed it, a lot.:_

_:Then you should do it. There are few enough mages who can teach, and fewer still who want to. We'd be insane to refuse your help, especially since you're so eager to give it:_ Elspeth was pleased; Windstar hadn't shown much interest in warfare magics, and she'd been starting to wonder just what her daughter was going to _do_ with all those years of training behind her.

Windstar smiled and leaned over the railing, watching the trees speed past underneath her. Finally, something for her to do! She disliked combative magics, though she did know them. She preferred magic that didn't involve killing people.

_:They're going to let me teach here, Mero:_ She told the Companion, though she would be willing to bet he'd been listening.

_:So I heard. That's good, I know how much you love teaching. You're very good at it, you know.:_ Windstar felt a blush creeping into her cheeks.

_:Do you really think so:_

_:Would I have said I so if I didn't mean it? Your enthusiasm for magic flows over into your teaching. It makes the students _want _to learn. Lystai and I talked about it.:_

_:Did you really. Do I sense Companion meddling here:_ Windstar kept the tone of her voice light; it was a little odd that they'd talked about her, but she'd talked about them. She teased him, though, because he'd often complained of the ranking Companions meddling in _his_ life.

_:Maybe a little… After all, I don't have a Chosen to mess with, so what's a horse to do? You're the closest available target, Windstar.:_ He whickered softly; the Companion version of giggles. Windstar snorted and grinned wryly at him.

_:Why don't you have a Herald yet, Mero: _Windstar asked, once the urge to laugh had calmed. _:You're almost my age, and well past the age most Companions Choose. What're you waiting for:_

Mero shuffled his hooves and flattened his ears to his head. _:That's a question I'd like to hear the answer to, myself.:_ Gwena muttered to her compatriot.

"The view is certainly nice from up here," Darkwind said, making Windstar jump. She looked over at her father, who was staring out over the trees. "I've seen this from Vree's eyes, but rarely from mine."

Windstar turned her eyes towards the forest as well. "I like seeing things from above," she told him. "Even the ugliest things are beautiful, when you see them from far enough up. I think maybe it's the detachment… It's hard to see the bad parts when you're so far above everything." She sent a quick comment to Mero, who was feeling pleased that Darkwind had saved him from thinking about an uncomfortable question.

_:Don't think you're getting out of this conversation, Mero. I'm going to bother you about this again.:_

_:I never doubted you would:_ he sighed.

Windstar turned back to her father, who had a pensive look on his face.

"You could be right about that, _ke'chara_. It is very hard to see anything properly, when you are far away." He looked over at her, noticing once again, with a little shock, just how much his little girl did _not_ look like a little girl anymore. He sighed deeply. "You are so _big_, Windstar."

She blinked, caught off guard by his comment. She'd forgotten how her father went from topic to topic, seemingly without any connection. It was a trait she shared.

"I'm not a little girl anymore, Papa. I haven't been for a long time."

Darkwind bowed his head, waiting for the lump in his throat to subside enough for him to speak. _How did she grow up? When? It feels like yesterday when I could hold her in one hand…_ He closed his eyes, overcome by a wave of nostalgia. Treyvan had told him she wouldn't stay little forever, but not amount of talking could have prepared him for the realization that she was an adult; that she didn't need him anymore.

A hand on his shoulder made him look up: Windstar smiled at him and opened her arms. Darkwind hugged her to him fiercely, closing his eyes and remembering how little she'd been, such a short time ago.

_:I still need you, Papa: _she whispered in his head. _:I'm an adult now, but that doesn't mean I want you out of my life. I think I need you now, more then ever… Need your advice, and support, and love.. I need to know there's someone who I can turn to, when I start to stumble.:_

His arms tightened around her, pulling her slender form closer. _:I'll always be there, _ke'chara_. Whenever you need help, Just turn to us.. You know we'll never turn you away.:_ Windstar sniffled against his chest.

"Oh, Papa, I missed you so much! Everyone was so nice in Kai-ling, and Lystai was wonderful, but I missed you and Mama so badly!" The words just tumbled from her; words she hadn't known she needed to say until now, releasing tension she hadn't known was there until it was gone.

"We missed you too, sweetling. The house was so empty, without you!" Darkwind's cheeks were wet. He'd been so sure they'd lost her to adulthood, so afraid that she would just walk out of their lives one day and never return.

Windstar pulled away from him slowly, he loosened his arms to let her go. She gave him a shaky smile, and he had a flash of his little girl, with her blotchy cheeks and red eyes. He smiled back and fumbled a handkerchief from his sleeve.

"Here," he said. "For your eyes…"

She took the bit of fabric and wiped her eyes dry. "I'd forgotten you always have a handkerchief with you..."

"They come in handy, sometimes. Usually they get used for less worthy purposes than drying a beautiful young woman's eyes, though."

Windstar smiled warmly at him and handed the handkerchief back. He folded it and stuffed it in his pocket. They looked at each other for a long while.

"I love you, Papa," Windstar said quietly.

Darkwind felt his heart swell to bursting. "I love you too, little one. I'm glad you're here."

She was silent for a long time, looking out over the trees. She'd not felt anything when she came home, she thought. Not when she put her feet on the ground.. But here, in this flying ship, with her father next to her and her mother a constant presence near her, she finally felt it.

She smiled out over the trees that rushed past. "I'm glad to be here."

Eclipse scowled. It was time for their daily duel; where was his father? They'd dueled every day since he was twelve, with no exceptions. He'd missed his mother's last moments while in a duel; her last words to him were lost forever, gasped out to a servant who had forgotten them instantly.

If his sister ever knew them, she wasn't telling. She hadn't spoken to him since that day.

Icestorm was very late, now… It was almost half a candlemark since when they were supposed to begin.

"Haven't you figured out he'sss not coming, boy?" Tathil's hissing voice broke him out of his mental rant.

"What do you mean, not coming?" Eclipse said, startled that he had to keep his voice from cracking. It was just a missed duel, why was he having such trouble controlling himself?

"He isss not coming. He iss busssy with the Healing Adept." Tathil's snake eyes glittered at him. "You havvve taken ssssecond placssse, Eclipsssse."

Eclipse felt his body going cold. Second place? Second place in _his father's_ own eye? Even when he was being punished, Eclipse had always been the center of attention.

He nodded his head curtly at the snake creature his father had created. "Thank you, Tathil." Without another word, he walked out of the dueling room.

Second place. That absolutely would not do.

"You. Get up." The voice broke through the haze that surrounded Skyfire's mind, forcing her to open her eyes and raise her head. Her headache had only gotten worse, and was now so bad she thought she'd have been sick, if there'd been anything in her stomach.

The young man grabbed her arm, hauling her to her feet. She whimpered in pain as her head was jostled. She was pushed out in front of the man as he walked, and she saw the vague outline of a door appearing in the wall. _So that's where the door was…._ She thought to herself.

It didn't even occur to her to wonder where he was taking her. All she knew was the pain in her head. She felt a wave of disorientation as they passed through the door, and suddenly they were outside. The smell of trees hit her in a wave, and she sobbed, drinking it in like a starving man eats. She'd thought she'd never smell trees again…

She was half-dragged towards some destination as she cried silently, wondering if _this_ was the last time she'd be outside. She couldn't see where she was; it was the dead of night and her eyes weren't focusing properly.

"Right," the voice said, and she was dumped to the forest floor. A boot prodded her ribs, pushing her to the right. "Your Vale is that way. I suggest you run, if you can… My father will not be pleased that his 'leverage' has escaped." The voice sounded extremely pleased by this; she wondered why. Why would you do something to _make_ someone mad at you?

The boot prodded her again. "Go on, get, you. There isn't a lot of time before he realizes what I've done."

Finally, the fear from the last few days hit her like a stone, and she dragged herself up onto her feet and staggered in the direction he'd indicated. _He could be lying,_ a nasty voice in her head whispered. _He could be sending you the wrong way._

_And I would be able to tell how?_ She asked the voice. _What, exactly, do you suggest? This at least is a change._ The voice stayed silent after that; the little part of her that was logical had apparently run out of arguments. She thought of nothing, only of stumbling a few more steps, then a few more.

Eclipse smiled as he watched the girl stagger through the brush. He doubted she'd make it even the few furlongs to where the Hawkbrother's patrols ran, but _his_ goal had been achieved.

_Second place my ass. He'll be furious with me. He'll have to do something about me; I set a prisoner free! He'll forget about Firesong in the fury _that_ will cause._

His smile widened. Perfect. He'd be damned if he'd share his father's attentions with anyone. Now, there was no way he'd stay second.


	13. Help is Coming

A Dance on the Edge of Sanity

Waiting was killing him. Silverfox had exhausted himself after two days of searching; Starfall had sent him to bed with orders to rest, at least. He was curled in Starfall's guest room; he couldn't go back to his _empty_ house.

After the warning rang across the Vale, Starfall, Silverfox, and Darian had raced towards the site where they'd last Felt Firesong. It had been no use, though… By the time they'd gotten there, nothing had been left but broken branches and, horrifyingly, a patch of Skyfire's blood. There was nothing to show them where Firesong and Skyfire were.

Silverfox closed his eyes tightly. The last few days without his lover and their daughter had been hell on earth. There was nothing he wanted more than to open his eyes and see Firesong lying next to him, smiling and planning some new adventure for their daughter. He shivered violently, chilled to the bone. Would he ever see them again?

_Of course you'll see them again, _he thought, angry with himself. _You have to stay positive… _Advice he'd given hundreds of times as a kestra'chern… But very hard to swallow himself.

He sighed and moved his head; he'd soaked that patch of pillow. It was so much harder, here, to keep his composure… But who was watching, anyways? He held himself together when searching for them, but here, while he was "resting," what was the point?

He moaned quietly and turned onto his other side. As he started a relaxation routine, his exhausted body dropped into sleep.

Windstar woke that morning to a feeling of dread hanging thick in the air. The sense that she _needed _to be somewhere had increased. She dressed quickly and headed out to the bow of the ship, straining her eyes towards their destination.

_:I have to admit, for speed, this beats us:_ Mero said, carefully moving his large body over the deck towards her. _:Call me old fashioned, though, but I still think it sounds better in songs for the hero to come running up on a pure white horse.:_

Windstar snorted. _:Whatever happened to you not being a horse, then:_

_:Well, physically, I am a horse. It's very similar to your situation… Physically, you are human. Inside, though, you're a demon.:_

She threw her head back and laughed. "Thank you, Mero."

The Companion snorted and touched his nose to her arm. _:You seemed like you needed something to lighten your spirit.:_ He said simply. _:It's worse today, isn't it:_

Windstar ran her fingers through Mero's mane. "Yes… It's much worse today. Something is _wrong_, Mero, but I can't tell what!"

He exhaled his breath in what sounded uncannily like a sigh. _:That is why more Foreseers wish they had any other Gift. There are very few true Seers… The rest of you only get pieces, or feelings that something is happening.:_

"Lucky us," she muttered, stroking his mane absently. He lipped her shirt comfortingly; he'd have given a lot to have arms again, to hug her.

She sighed, staring into the air in front of her. "Brooding about not knowing anything isn't really going to help, though. I could try scrying…"

_:I wouldn't, if I were you. There's a chance that whatever is bringing you here is magical, and might recognize a scrying attempt.:_

"This is true. Thanks, Mero."

_:Certainly.:_

"I guess I'm stuck waiting, then."

_:So it would seem.:_

The scowl that twisted Windstar's face was truly something to behold. "Mero, I hate waiting."

"I wonder where you got that trait?" A teasing voice asked behind her. Windstar smiled, but did not turn around.

"I don't know, Mama… It couldn't possibly be from you."

Elspeth cackled. "Of course not! I'm well known for my patience."

Windstar eyed her mother. "Mama, that laugh is scary. You sounded like a madwoman."

"I am a madwoman, dear," Elspeth replied, tossing her hair over her shoulder. "I have to be, to not go completely crazy."

"Ooookay then…"

Elspeth shrugged and sat down on the deck. Having been raised with her feet firmly on the ground at all times, she wasn't nearly as comfortable as her husband with the flying ships. They were lovely, and wonderful transportation… But it would be nice if they would fly closer to the ground than the clouds.

_:I completely agree with that, Chosen:_ Gwena muttered, wishing the ship were wider so she could have more space between her and the railings. Elspeth sent the feeling of a hug to the Companion, who had refused to leave the exact middle of the ship since boarding.

_:We're almost there, dearheart:_ she said reassuringly. The captain of this merchant ship had told her they should arrive in Errold's Grove right around noon.

_:It can't be fast enough for me.:_

Windstar had dark rings under her eyes, Elspeth noted. _She hasn't gotten used to Foresight, yet,_ she thought. _When you're older, you learn not to worry about things that are going to happen; you just get prepare for them and hope for the best._ Elspeth had Felt the increase in urgency today as well, but she understood that they were going as fast as they could, and no amount of fretting would get them there faster.

She placed her hand on her daughter's shoulder; Windstar jumped and stared at her.

"Relax, dearling," she said. "We'll get there when we get there; until then, there's no use worrying."

Windstar's eyebrows furrowed. "I just wish there were something I could do now. I feel so helpless… What if something terrible is happening, and—"

"And there is nothing you can do now. Think on it this way, Windstar. Even you are limited at this distance; there isn't a lot you can do. You don't know what the situation is, you don't know how dangerous it is, you can't make a decent decision with no information. You could even make a bad situation worse revealing yourself now, where you can't do anything, instead of keeping quiet and acting when you can make a difference."

Windstar sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. "I know, I know." She turned to give her mother a wry smile. "It makes perfect sense… That doesn't mean I like it."

Elspeth grinned. "Of course not. I hate it, too. I wish there were something I could do from here, but there isn't, so I just pace and give lectures on the Way of the World."

"Could be worse. You could be giving me 'Lessons in Patience.' Those were Lystai's _favorite._"

"Mmm… Patience. Yuck." Elspeth shook her hair out of her eyes and eyed the cabin where her husband still slept. "I envy your father, in situations like these. He just sleeps through the waiting. He told me once 'I might as well get as much rest as I can; chances are good I won't be sleeping a lot in the near future.'"

"It's a good point," Windstar said.

"Mm, yes, it is." The Herald glanced at her daughter with amused eyes. "You and me both, though, we stress over the future instead of waiting for it."

Windstar laughed and ruffled her hand through Mero's mane again. "Foresight. Damn it."

Elspeth chuckled. "Yes, Foresight. That, and we are more high stress than your father. And less patient."

"To the deepest of the nine hells with patience," Windstar growled. She wished the Foresight would shut up… She _never_ woke this early voluntarily.

"Amen." Elspeth stretched her arms forward, popping her shoulders. Then she leaned back and kicked her legs out in front of her, resting on her elbows. "They tell me we'll be there by noon, so it's not too bad. I'm quite grateful for these ships of theirs."

Windstar nodded and sank down to sit on the deck next to her mother. Mero watched them both from his position near the railings. "I've been thinking we should build some for Valdemar," Windstar said, watching for her mother's reaction.

"Do you know how to build them, then?" Elspeth asked, her eyebrows flying upwards. "I would think the Kailinese would rather the flying ships stay their advantage."

Windstar shrugged. "There are some who would think that. Lystai and Empress Shikomi decided I should learn how to make them… Or at least, how to make them _fly_. I haven't a clue how to design a real _ship_."

"What do you mean, a 'real' ship?"

"Well, you see, there are ships, and then there are boats, and barges, and the like," she replied, stretching. "A ship like this one, or even more so, the _Coi Serke, _is designed especially for speed. They're utterly perfect for their purpose; to move quickly through the air. The people who design these are artists, Mama."

Elspeth nodded. "I'd noticed. These are nothing like the boats on Lake Evendim."

The younger mage shook her head. "No, they're nothing like those. The comparison would be like a child's treehouse to an _ekele_; alike only at the surface."

"That would explain why they would be willing to teach you, then. They still have the advantage, because they're better shipmasters."

"Yes, I suspect that was part of it. I think, though, that I could design a functional ship that would be fast _enough_."

"Oh?"

"I've been thinking about it, and I actually think I _might _be able to make something worth having. I certainly saw enough ships while I was in Kai-ling; inside and out. And they gave me some designs; though none for the fastest ships. Anyways, a good deal of learning is imitation."

Elspeth nodded and toyed with one of her curls. "That's true enough. You sound hesitant, though."

"Well, Mama, making a ship would require materials, which means money. I don't know how I'd justify the expense, when I'm not even sure it would work."

"Hmm…" Elspeth chewed on the hair thoughtfully. "They are certainly useful; no one could dispute that. I think you could justify the experiment, if you got a model you liked, first."

"Of course. I wouldn't just start from scratch. That'd be stupid."

"It would."

They lapsed into silence for a while; Elspeth chewed on her fingernails, Windstar stared into space. Neither of them were completely awake yet. Suddenly, Elspeth snapped her gaze back to Windstar with the air of someone who had almost fallen asleep, but had caught herself at the last moment.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Windstar twitched and came out of her half trance. "Err… I was thinking I should ask the Artificers for help with the ship. If anyone can design, they can."

"That's a great idea, actually. You'll have to find the ones who don't resent the Mages, though."

"Is that still a problem, then?" Windstar asked, sighing gustily.

"Yes. Less so than it was, and it's improved incredibly since before the Storms, but there are still those who resent us."

"I suppose that's understandable… Mages do make some problems totally irrelevant. Like heating, for example. Or lighting."

"Very true." Elspeth shifted to lie on her side. "It is a shame; imagine what we could do if the Mages and the Artificers worked together more often?"

"You already know how well that worked during the Storms. Also, think of what we know of the Eastern Empire from Tremane, and the Kailinese Islands, and the Kaled'a'in."

Elspeth nodded, her eyes serious. "I know, dearling. Just think how far we've come, though. Valdemar went from having no magic at all to having Herald-Mages, all in less than twenty years. All and all, I'm very proud."

Windstar nodded reluctantly. "I do think we could stand some improvement, though. I just feel like we have a lot of potential sitting around, not being used. When I think of what we could do…."

Elspeth's grin made Windstar blink and raise her eyebrows in a silent question. "So fix it," Elspeth said.

"What?"

"Fix it. You see a problem, do something about it. You certainly have the authority… Use it." Elspeth winked at her, then grinned again at the stunned look on her daughter's face.

"That might be a good idea…" Windstar muttered, staring into space again.

All she knew was pain. She felt like her head was going to explode, she hadn't eaten in who knows how long, and she was so thirsty her lips were cracking. Skyfire was so exhausted, she couldn't even think of a snide comment to make to herself.

_Now what do I do?_ She wondered. Her vision had almost completely failed her; the forest swam together into a blur. She was so tired… She just wanted to curl up and go to sleep, but if she did that, Goddess only knew what would come after her. The forest was not a safe place to collapse.

Skyfire fell to her knees yet again, biting back a whimper. She had no idea how long she'd been walking, nor where she was. If she could just _see_, it would have been easier for her to get home.

Fighting the wave of hopelessness that threatened to overcome her, she tried to think of a new plan.

_I could use Mindspeech… I don't know if I'm near enough for it to help.. But honestly, I'm running out of options._ Working past the headache would be difficult, but what else was she going to do?

With a plan set out in front of her, Skyfire sat down on the forest floor and sank into the half-trance required of her if she wanted to do any serious Mindspeech. Her head pounded in time with her heart, the pain getting worse as she tapped into her Gifts, sending her mind out in search of another intelligent mind.

Just as her Gift was running out, she got a reply.

The creature Sent an inquiry at her. It was confused. _:Who calls:_

Skyfire was elated. _:I call! Please, friend, I need your help:_

_:Friend: _She didn't recognize the 'feeling' of the speaker.. It wasn't a human, dyheli, or hertasi…

_:Yes. Friend. Please…:_ She could feel herself losing her grip on the Gift; her last chance was slipping away because this creature didn't understand her!

_:I come. Wait, friend.:_ The contact was broken; Skyfire could only hope that whoever, whatever it was, it could find and help her, and soon.

She tried to stand, to start walking again, but found her legs were too weak to carry her any further. She groaned and crawled until she found a tree to lean against, and waited.

_I hope it's fast, whatever it is…_

_:Friend:_ She twitched tiredly. Apparently it was fast.

_:Yes.. Friend. Help me:_

She Felt the creature's presence moving towards her; when it was almost on top of her, she recognized it as a bird. A bondbird.

Before she had time to fully process that a _bondbird_ had come to help her, she felt a huge rush of air in front of her as the bird landed. _He must be _huge, she thought as her hair was blown from her face. A hooked beak easily as long as her hand ruffled through her hair.

_:Friend. You hurt:_ The bird was preening her hair; she felt oddly comforted by the caring gesture.

_:Yes. Hurt, and lost…:_

_:Lost? Lost eyas fallen from nest.:_

_:I suppose you could put it that way:_ she muttered, wishing bondbirds were better known for their problem solving skills.

_:Find nestmates for you, I can. Other birds, with friends. I find, bring them to you. You stay.:_

_Be careful what you wish for…_ Skyfire thought to herself, impressed that he bird had come up with that plan on its own. She should have thought of that… She wished she could see the bird, but her eyes weren't working.

"Okay," she whispered through cracked lips, hoping the bird could understand spoken speech as well. She was too tired for Mindspeech…

Skyfire felt the bird's beak close on her collar. It tugged insistently. _:Follow. I will take you to safe place, you stay there, I find friends. Come.:_ The girl crawled along, trusting the bird to keep her safe. At the bird's direction, she crawled into a hollow in the roots of a tree.

_:Stay. I bring friends. Stay.:_

As if she could do anything else… Skyfire felt her eyesight dim completely, and she slumped to the ground, drifting in and out.

Darian frowned and ran his hands through his hair for the thousandth time. _:Have you found any trace of them, Tyrsell: _ He asked, hoping the dyheli knew something he didn't.

_:Not in the last five minutes, no: _the king stag replied, without any of the sarcasm he could have added.

Darian sent an inquiry to Kuari, who also sent a negative. There was no trace of Firesong and his daughter. They had completely disappeared.

Kuari's surprised and startled call shocked Darian out of his brooding.

_:Stranger:_ Kuari elaborated. _:New bird, needs help.:_

Darian frowned. Should he really take time off the search to help an unknown bondbird?

_:You help! Kilara's friend needs help:_ Friend? Not bondmate? That was odd… The "friend" in that call came with a feeling of human, but did bondbirds make human friends?

Kuari flew in and landed on a branch next to Darian's shoulder. The huge bird stared into the forest, waiting for the mystery 'Kilara'.

Darian had seen a bond eagle once, when he came to k'Vala for the first time. He stared as Kilara swooped through the trees. This bird was even larger than the blacksmith's bird had been! Her deep black and gold feathers shown in the sunlight, and Darian couldn't help but smile in appreciation of the beautiful bird.

_:You! You help friend:_ The eagle's voice sang clearly in his mind, startling him again. Kuari voice rarely sounded so clearly. Kilara backwinged hard, landing on a branch that brought her head level with Darian's.

_:Little friend needs help, is hurt! She is scared. Led her to safe place, but still dangerous:_ The bird's concern for her "little friend" was so consuming, Darian felt it even though he wasn't bonded to the eagle.

_:Is it possible this "little friend" is Skyfire, Darian:_ Tyrsell asked. The stag glided into the clearing where he stood and looked directly into Kilara's eyes.

_:What does your friend look like:_ The dyheli asked. Darian wasn't sure she'd be able to answer, but it was worth a try…

He eyes widened as an image of Skyfire was pushed into his mind. A tattered, exhausted, and dirty Skyfire. Darian sent a Mindcall for help to the two scouts in either direction; there was no way he'd go out into possibly hostile forest without backup.

Tyrsell walked closer to allow him to mount as Kuari launched himself into the air. He turned to look into the eagle's intelligent eyes.

_:Lead the way, Kilara:_ he told her. The eagle gave a triumphant cry and threw herself into the air.

In a moment of semi-consciousness, Skyfire hoped that Kilara would return soon. It was almost worst, knowing help was coming and having to wait, then having no hope of help coming at all.

She slipped in and out, her headache so all consuming that she had no idea whether a minute or a day had passed. It could have been either…

Suddenly, the bird was back.

_:I come: _She crowed into Skyfire's mind, making the girl wince. _:Brought friends, hawk friends:_ Skyfire came almost completely conscious at that, finding the will to drag herself partially out of the hollow to make herself more visible.

"Skyfire!" She knew that voice… Darian ran towards the girl half hidden by one of the forest giants, Tyrsell and Wintersky right behind him. He fell to his knees next to the girl, Kilara landing near him to mantle protectively over her.

"Skyfire?" He asked, turning her onto her back gently. "Skyfire, are you alright?" She looked like death warmed over, and judging by her unfocused eyes, she couldn't see much.

"I've… been better… Big brother…" She croaked, giving up on trying to see him and closing her eyes. "Can… we… Go home, please?"

"Yes," Darian said shortly, eying the eagle glaring at him over Skyfire's prone body.

_:I'm going to pick her up:_ he told the eagle, not liking how she was glaring at him. _:It may hurt her, but we have to get her home.:_

The bird eyed him carefully, considering his words. _:Home. Good.: _She said finally. _:Go now.:_

Well, if that wasn't an order, he didn't know what was. Carefully working his arms under the girl, he lifted her as gently as he could and mounted Tyrsell, who had knelt down to make things as easy for the girl as possible.

_:Should I go slowly, or quickly, so we may get her to the Healers more quickly: _The stag asked.

Darian sighed and hugged the girl closer to his body, cradling her head so she wouldn't be jostled too much. _:Quickly, my friend… I think she needs help more than she needs to be cosseted, right now.:_

The stag nodded and leapt into a ground eating lope, which was thankfully less teeth rattling than his gallop.

"We'll be home soon, Skyfire… You're safe now." The only reply he got was a whimper.

Silverfox stood quietly outside Keisha's sickroom. Skyfire had been completely unconscious by the time Darian had gotten her back to the Vale. Keisha had immediately put her to bed and started Healing the most obvious of her injuries. She'd had two broken ribs, a sprained ankle, and several cuts on the back of her head.

She'd also had a concussion. That injury had been the most severe, and was still the most worrying.

Children often started developing Gifts at Skyfire's age; any trauma made that development all the more likely. In fact, trauma often caused Gifts to develop suddenly and explosively, to their fullest possible potential.

Starfall believed that Skyfire's channels had been forced open by the concussion. What her Gifts were remained to be seen; she'd inherited huge amounts and varied types of potential from Firesong.

Silverfox sighed deeply and put his head in his hands. The damage caused by channels opening under trauma like Skyfire's had could only be Healed by a Healing Adept. Darian had never had to Heal human magical injuries, and Keisha had said he shouldn't try, not yet. There was still no trace of Firesong.

He raised his head only when Aya flapped onto the bench next to him, radiating sadness and worry. He hadn't yet collapsed, which meant Firesong was still alive… But Aya couldn't find Firesong, even with Silverfox's help. The firebird cuddled into Silverfox's side, crooning quietly. He stroked the bird's feathers as he stared into space, waiting for Keisha to come out of her Healing trance and let others back into the room. She'd forbidden _anyone_ to enter while she was Healing Skyfire; not harming the charred channels any further would require all her concentration, and distractions could seriously harm the girl.

Starfall came into the clearing and sat down next to Silverfox. The older man clasped the kestra'chern's shoulder, lending his silent support. The younger man leaned into Starfall's shoulder, closing his eyes.

"Firesong?" Silverfox asked quietly.

Starfall shook his head. "Still no trace of him… Perhaps Skyfire will be able to tell us something."

Silverfox nodded and continued stroking Aya's feathers. His thoughts turned back to Skyfire; she'd looked horrible when Darian had carried her in… And she hadn't been alone.

The huge black eagle perched in the trees just above them hadn't left her spot since Keisha had started the Healing. She'd displayed none of the shiftiness typical of raptors… They generally did not take well to waiting. The fact that she had not left told the Tayledras that she had bonded to the young girl, though the bond likely had not fully taken root yet; Skyfire had been too delirious to recognize it.

They stood together in silence, waiting. Silverfox didn't know how long they waited before Darian ran up to them.

Starfall looked up from the ground towards Darian, surprised. "Darian?" he asked.

"Darkwind, Elspeth, and Windstar are here," he said without preamble.

Silverfox's head came up at that. "What? Why?"

Darian shook his head, running his hand through his hair. "I don't know. But they're here. Windstar wants to know if she can help Keisha."

"Is she a Healer?"

"Healing Adept. She thinks she can help."

"Please," a female voice said. Windstar walked into the clearing, her face sympathetic. "I think this is why I needed to be here."

Starfall's brows furrowed. "Needed to be here?"

The young woman nodded. "Foresight… My mother and I both felt a _need_ to be here."

Silverfox nodded silently. "If Keisha will have you, I can't see what harm it will do…"

Windstar gave Silverfox a tiny, reassuring smile, and went to the door of the Healing room. It seemed she sent a mental inquiry to Keisha, because a few moments later, the door opened and Windstar went into the room.

The men outside went back to waiting, and hoping…

A shriek of utter fury echoed through the halls, raising the hair on the back of Firesong's neck. He shuddered, praying that whatever had caused the outburst, it didn't concern Skyfire or himself.

It seemed his goddess wasn't listening to prayers right now, as the door blew open and Icestorm strode in, hell in his eyes.

"Icestorm," Firesong croaked, knowing peace making attempts were hopeless, but trying anyways. He held out his hands in a feeble attempt to calm the other man.

It didn't work. He'd never seen the other mage in a silent rage like this one…

As pain roared through his body, he realized he never wanted to again. For the first time since he'd been captured, Firesong screamed.


End file.
